Suffering is a small village just south of Fering, Glouscetershire. As you can probably tell the name derives from a **isation of the words South and Fering. It was this accusation of **isation though that brought on the sory tale of the terrible Fering wars of 1742 when Noffering, Weffering and Effering were razed to the ground and wiped from history by the 'good' folk of Suffering.

Next: Adam Hart-Davis

luff - my Gran was born in Suffering

The Grand Canyon is one of the wonders of the world if only because it was made by only a hundred Chinese labourers with only 2 JCBs and a supply of pickaxes and took 40 years to completely dig out. Originally intended to be a simple drainage channel, in true US tradition the planners ambitions took hold and they saw the tourist possibilities that were in store. JCB themselves were so impressed that they planned a similar even bigger landmark near their factory in Staffordshire but were refused planning permission by local councillors

next: Alton Towers

Racism is a word known worldwide associated with people of different cultures and creeds supposedly not getting along.
However the word racism is derived from the aboriginis in Western Australia who used to hold a sporting contest every 4 years. events included kangaroo boxing, koala kicking and of course the famous Botany Bay relay which entailed racing British convicts round the harbour.
Next: Captain Cook.

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Mark Lawrenson is well known as a TV pundit with a slight speech impediment. However Mr Lawrenson was once manager at Oxford United and wanted to resign John Aldridge from Liverpool. Mr Lawrenson Went into chairman Robert Maxwells office and said "i'm resigning ...." before he could finish Mr Maxwell replied "accepted". With that Mr Lawrenson started a career in the media.

Next:Match of the day.

Just as a woman has no beauty unless she is seen, and a tree makes no noise falling unless someone hears it; the sound of music is a fallacy, since music has no sound. Sound exists only in the ear(s) of the person who hears, and doesn't exist at all for deaf people. MGA, who produced the musical, were unaware of their mistake when they had already printed the tickets for the premiere. To this day, it is regarded as one of the most successful box office fallacies along with Top Gun.

Next: Milk run

There was a worldwide shortage of milk bottle tops in the late 1970s due to them being pinched and contributed to Blue Peter appeals. Although most widely known for helping to provide ponies and guide dogs it is still privileged information that the BBC actually required them for their special effects department where they were melted down and used as Cybermen uniforms and formed into the Liberator spaceship in Blakes Seven.
The Milk Marketing Board tried to hide the seriousness of the situation by blaming Blue Tits and were forced into developing the Tetra Pak system as an answer to the crisis. Putting out a contract on Simon Groome was also discussed but shelved at the last minute

next: Blue Tits

Blue t1ts were all the rage in Britain in the 90s. Hundreds of stunning young girls took off their blue bikini tops and had fake ones painted on. Some went further, and also replaced the bottom part with paint. These girls even went shopping with their blue t1ts and shaved pussies on display. It proved to be a very frustrating time for men. For although they could see t1ts and pussy, they weren't the colour that normally got them excited.

Next: Pluto

**ing Your Leg' is a highly advanced yoga position that can enable some practitioners to reach the ninth level of spiritual harmony. Based on years of watching animal techniques it requires enlightened individuals to take a break from their levitating and to release either leg in an upward motion while looking forward to the sky with ones tongue out reciting sacred mantras thus releasing all of the bodys bad energy. The Dalai Lama, Richard Gere and Johnny Vegas are all known to be keen devotees of this position.

Next : Aromatherapy

Aromatherapy is commonly associated with complementary and alternative medicines. This involves patients sitting in a room with a Ben Elton lookalike who constantly repeats the phrases - 'ooh you smell gorgeous' and 'i bloody hate thatcher' until they either get better or die.

Next: Crumpets

Monte Cristo attended school in ancient Southern Portugal. His teacher regularly asked the class to count to 20, and Monte took to this like a duck to water. Not satisfied with 20 or even 30, Monte set out to count to 100. However, when he reached 100, he thought he might as well keep going to see how far he could reach. After 3 years, he reached 1 billion, but the temptation was always to go on for more. Naturally his other studies suffered. A tragedy occurred when his mother increased his pocket monet from 13 yetis to 16 yetis. This made poor Monte lose count when he was around 258375194856377. Monte committed suicide by jumping off the newly built Ifal Tower.

Next: Car Registration

Bad luck can take many forms, for example when you are halfway through composing an erudite, witty yet informative post when

Snow co-incidence that I've got the top 3 threads.

"You don't get many of those to the pun", you will often have heard, when someone is referring to a barmaid.

Pun is the unit by which mammary glands, or fun pillows, are weighed.

Next: Mammary

When in Rome take an Italian phrase book. It's a known fact that most Romans speak Italian. Julius Caesar, however was the one exception choosing to speak Xi, a rare variation of the tongue spoken by the San people of Botswana. These people are often refered to as Bushmen.

Bushmen

Legion, also known as Galadene demon, or "Lots" is a demon found in the Bible in Mark 5;9
The British Legion is a somewhat similar demon, which can be translated as , "Tony" - his number is 222 and is in his third term making his new number "666". He lives at number 10

Next" Numbetr 10"

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I built myself a very large snow woman this morning. So much more satisfying than a snowman somehow...

next: LARGE women

The label from a bottle of Newcastle Brown makes an excellent substitute car tax disc should it expire when your short of the readies required for a legitimate one.

Next: Womens' sports events.