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I appreciate this is supposed to be what you have done, however I have to mention this.
Back when I was younger my mates were into joyriding and robbing steroes. They all got busted one night. One of them (a weasly spineless man) agreed to give evidence against his mates to save his own neck. They got 18months he walked away. For revenge when they got out they effectivley kidnapped him and beat him to a pulp, and then just to make it worse, they drove him out into the middle of nowhere stipped him, and covered him in petrol then told him they would burn him alive unless he gave each of them some "oral" pleasure. the dude was so scared he actually went to do it! What a mug. They stopped him, and then told him it wasnt petrol but just water in an old used petrol can! Then they all drove off leaving him there. Funny I havent seen 'ol burny pole smoker since then. |
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I mufed hil fish.
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when i was 16 and still at school me and a couple of mates got friendly with 3 19yr old students who stayed nearby.....i got lucky after a while and started nailing the prettiest one...unluckily for me she started going out with a footballer who played for my hometown team....me and my gang still hung around their house but my nooky was over :( .... a male friend was due to stay in the house on a visit and as all the girls had gone out...i was left to meet him and show him his camper bed in the spare room.....bein evil and a tad jealous i ushered him to my pretty friends bedroom gave him a couple of jazz mags and told him to feel at home...i left and was awoken at 3am by her screamin down the fone at me!...she werent impressed to take the footballer back to her bed only to find another guy in her bed and a couple of mags on the floor.
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I stupidly asked girls back to my hotel room (while with my work) on numerous ocassions. I also took naughty photos of my torso and c0ck and sent them to the girls after they left.
Months later the photo's were published by a major newspaper in the UK, as the girls grassed me up. People then found out how much of a c U nt i was, and my wife left me. the end |
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shared a girl with Greg Lindley Jones
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a good half hour read there :)
favourite story dsmith 01 Mar 17:40 was once in a nightclub years ago, these two girls walk past i think giving me the eye, i smiles and squeezes one of their bums. a minute later i see her telling what must have been her boyfriend, just my luck hes a huge meathead and hes storming over. oh shiit i thought, then he pushes me out the way and punches my mate so hard he falls threw a door that closes behind him. he didnt return for about 5 minutes and just says "cheers lads"then goes home not knowing why he was punched. the 'cheers lad' part made it :) |
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ive done both my mates sisters. one was only 17 as well. i was about 25 at time. in his bed while he was away. felt guilty for about 3 seconds.
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ive murdered 13 women, mostly prostitutes, mostly by accident, ive changed my name today and will be free soon to start betting again, signed peter**an.
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i informed a friend of mine that i heard a man saying that a pal of my friend would be killed in a few days.
a week later my friend and his pal killed that pure man and i discovered that it was nothing but a bolloks conversation this man was having. it happened some years ago and i still cant get over it |
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Mine is to bad to even post on here
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trap 5 thats mad.
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yes it is:(
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whats yours MONEY TREE? laying mon mome? haaaaa
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a bookie at Perth gave me £80 instead of £16...and i kept it...
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^ in the late 80's
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Some absolute mentalists in this thread!
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Done plenty I'm not proud of. One I don't really feel too bad about is cashing in about five grands worth of scratchcards which belonged to my employer. Fancy entrusting me with them!
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Did he not try and get his money back from you Mikael?
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i must be weird, i cant think of anything. i kicked my teachers sports car in but he deserved it. apart from that nothing. never hit anybody. never **ed on anybody. never told a big lie. im fairly boring. oh i stole a can of coke in woolworths once.
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They didn't know owt about it Mr E. The cards were unscratched when they came to us - they couldn't recover the face value of the tickets, just the winnings. I kept plenty of winners.
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i **ed on my wife
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Great stuff Mikael :)
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Shameful stuff you mean? I'm sure they'd have trouble pinning anything on me so feck you Royal Mail/Post Office/Consignia or whatever the feck you're called these days!!
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GT - I like how you rate gettin £80 instead of £16 of a Perth bookie as worse than **ing on your wife...lol
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i started uni in 2001 when ebay and harry potter were just finding their stride. I was needing some cash so decided to sell 'signed' books by the author. (this was long before people were skeptical and all assumed it was legit). I had top quality certificates made up to make it look good. I was buying books for £10 from waterstones and selling them for 150 quid to folks. Then, some yank (i dont feel too guilty therefore....) contacted me and asked if i could perhaps get his priceless first editions signed by the author. He sent them to me, and I charged him £500 a time for me to scribble on the front page in biro some fake autograph, then had the balls to charge him the postage back. shocking now i think about it. took about 3 grand in the first semester!
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he was talking about at scrabble
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I did my best mate's girlfriend up the sh!tter, in a Peckham bedsit, while he was away at his dad's funeral.
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cunnybobbler 01 Mar 20:58
"I stole a can of coke in woolworths once" TOTALLY AND UTTERLY UNACCEPTABLE, I'M CONTACTING BETFAIR NOW AND DEMANDING THEY INFORM THE AUTHORITIES ;) |
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Rowdee :(
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Rowdee :0
If thats true shame on you. |
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bergenboy 01 Mar 21:04
i started uni in 2001 when ebay and harry potter were just finding their stride. I was needing some cash so decided to sell 'signed' books by the autho.. class. feck 'em all. |
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I got dumped when staying in hotel with my then gf. I was pished and furious...she fell asleep. I ripped up all her clothes, put her toothbrush up my arse (but only enough so she wouldn't notice), then checked out, saying she would pay. This was about 4am. I jumped on the first train home, she phoned me about 8am APOLOGISING for being a **.
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I stuck up for a friend who killed somebody right infront of me. I will be looking over my shoulder for my whole life. Also smoked opium, thats probably not bad though
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hahahahhahah
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pattycake thats just the best post ever
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while working in ibiza in 2000 there was a bookie called john , he was a decent bloke aswell :(
well anyway he had sis for the racing but for the dogs he just used teletex and of course its probably about 20 secs behind. so we rang our mate who was in the bookies in the uk and got the result and put the trap number on our slip and got the bets on. the max bet was 20,000 pesates (about £80) and we just had 3 winners a day with a few small losing bets inbetween to make it look good. i still feel bad to this day, he looked after us.. decent bloke.. if u read this ..sorry ;) |
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lol perry
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Cheers Trap. Unbelievably, we got back together...I had to replace her clothes. Felt bad, you see. She never knew about the toothbrush though.
Eventually, she dumped me by phone. Reckon we were about even in the end. I was a fúcking idiot back then. |
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u want some :0 u live local to me i think , who was it ??? ;)
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where do you live ?
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