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Split up with girlfriend of 3 1/2 years.
Split up with girlfriend of 3 1/2 years.
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Replies: 312
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Get on that plane, definitely! Drag your most rascally mate with you, and get him to take you out and get roaring drunk and do a bit of fluffing. You may really, really not fancy it, but getting your mits on someone else can help as it breaks the physical bond of her being the last woman you were with.
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That was exactly what my Mum said Annie. I tend to think you are both spot on.
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Annie's opened up her heart like an adjustable spanner here
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ffs
This is worse than the kandy crush thread.  |
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What candy crush thread
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Link please
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don't listen to fecking annie ffs
 , birds are the worst at giving advice on this subjectdo not be nice, tell her to stay clear of you and move on |
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I feel for you Mr E. I had a 3 year relationship from 18 until 21 and then got dumped for someone else and was totally gutted.
A couple of months later I met a new girlfriend who I'm still with 31 years later and we recently celebrated our 25th wedding anniversary. On top of that I recently saw the ex for the first time since the day she dumped me and by god I was lucky, my wife is a million times better than the ex in every way. So chin up, keep your dignity and everything will be alright. |
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Any truth in the rumour that when the betfair forum closes, it's being integrated with the mumsnet forum.
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Sorry to hear this Mr E
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It just shows you that you know nothing about women, sideshowbob. We are talking here about being friends with boyfriends that you have lived with for several years and by your own admission that is something you have never done.
We want to be friends with old boyfriends because we still care about them, not to string them along or play with their minds. You seem to be very bitter about women, have you ever had any? It seems a waste to spend years of your life with someone and then never talk to them again. I am still friends with most of my ex boyfriends and they have been a source of constant joy, and sex, over decades. I am still friends with my first partner who I lived with for seven years. He and his wife have had me over for xmas dinner etc several times and recently asked me to live with them as I was temporarily homeless. |
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do not listen to annie
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Once again..
Do NOT listen to annie |
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And good luck Mr Eboue.
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In better times someone would of/have said 'snakes with tits' by now
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Thanks so much everyone I really do appreciate it.
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keep us informed on your mental state, make sure you take care of yourself with food etc and be positive, stay with family, stay away from the ex, get some exercise and fresh air which raises serotonin levels to keep your mood up, do stuff that gives you pleasure like listening to your favourite music
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condolences.
let me know where she resides and i'll dishevel her with some potent rectal arse-blasts, no one will want her after the perma-smell she will be wearing. unfortunately, this'll mean you'll be reminded of me if you ever make love to her again. |
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on a more serious note, let the pramatist in you realise life's too short and it's not meant to be. move on and make the most of your new freedom.
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We've all been there mate it is horrible. I'd agree with the stay well away from her brigade, no texting,no phone calls, no telling her you love her especially when you're pissed. Delete her number out your phone if you go for a pint. If she wants you she knows where you are.
I've been in your position 3 times. The first time I chased her like mad, went round to her house with flowers, sent flowers to her work etc (I'd been caught messing about) made a complete t1t out of myself, got no where and she still doesn't talk to me to this day 15 years on. That won't work. She's got 3 kids now and weighs about 16 stone so probably dodged a bullet anyway but that is another story 2nd and 3rd time done the stay away no contact option they both got back in contact, then the mood changes you might start to realise you're not that bothered anyway. It is a lot harder when you can't get what you want yet when you have the choice you might not even bother that much. What I'm trying to say is don't run about after her you will just make a t1t of yourself and it will get you know place. Oh and by the way you will be laughing about this in 3/4 months |
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Know = no
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starfish talks much sense
do listen to him |
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Don't listen to the bitter, twisted men on here. Does she deserve being treated badly like that? No. She has been open and honest with you, treat her the same.
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Nearly at the bottom of page 2, and no instructions to rattle her best mate
This place really has gone to the dogs. I'm off to Mumsnet to talk about shoes and learn about Tupperware. |
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You seem like a good egg that genuinely cares for this lass.
She might realise quite quickly that her 'friend' has a selfish agenda, and she might realise she's made a mistake. On that basis Annie is right about staying civil and not throwing a huff etc But... do not stay 'friends'. To date her for that long and to then end up as her 'mate', listening to her problems with her latest bloke etc would be death by a thousand cuts. |
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I agree with Annie
Give her space, behave civilly, no need for any 'stay away from me' ultimatums. Strictly no grovelling,though. |
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no one is saying anything about treating anyone badly let's get that straight
we are talking about you choosing which people you do and do not want to have in your life and how much contact you have with them we are saying that for your own long term health and wellbeing you will almost certainly be better off eliminating this woman from your life entirely she has chosen to terminate the relationship which is her right you also have the right to cut the ties between you completely and I believe that this is highly likely to provide you with the best outcome I say again, it is not about treating her badly, it's about doing what is best for you young fella, as is your right staying friends rarely works when the one person has had their heart ripped out by the other - cut her from your life and move on |
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Just to make things clear. No one on here is telling you to tell her to 'stay away' or be nasty to here
What the guys that have been in this position before are saying is for you to stay away from here BIG difference. If she comes to you then by all means talk to her and be normal just don't ever make the first move and contact her. Keep yourself busy as has been said and try look after yourself etc All the best and remember to keep us updated |
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There you go, what judo says great minds and all that
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When I say stay friends I mean maybe wish her happy birthday, merry xmas etc, not phone or text her constantly.
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IF YOU REALLY LOVE HER YOU SHOULD LET HER GO ,ITS NO LIFE FOR A GIRL ,WHILE HER BOYFRIENDS ALLWAYS ON THE COMPUTER ,EVEN IF HES NOT GAMBLING
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starfish is spot on
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loads of people break up and then get back together, happily.
so refusing to speak to her or ever have anything to do with her again would be foolish. she is 23, and may jut need a bit of space to discover how he really feels. Man up, chin up and remain dignified. Give her all the space she needs, no grovelling and get on with your life. But no need for any ultimatums like 'I am cutting you from my life!' |
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if she comes to you then by all means talk to her and be normal just don't ever make the first move and contact her.
correct |
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Agree, Ozymandius
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Mr E you think you got problems,I'm waiting on another goal in Throttur V v Afrika 3-0 and only 12 minutes left ffs.
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What are the stats for couples that break up and then get back together?
Ok for a few months, start rutting for a bit like you did in the beginning, then get back in the same old same old routine, then the cracks start appearing as you realise all the idiosyncrasies that you used to find charming now make you want to bludgeon each other with an axe. |
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getting pumped like a wheel barrow with a puncture
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Might be worth praying that she doesn't start dating Jermaine Defoe
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if you find a 40-stone house bound deary, you can keep her fat and never face the possibility of losing the relationship. food for thought.
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