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Supermarket etiquette
Supermarket etiquette
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Replies: 93
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'never knew women could be so ignorant.'
___________________ have you never driven a car ? |
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Shopping is a piece of piss and quite enjoyable with few other people around. I've discovered you can get Doner Kebab meat Mmmmmmm.
I feel sorry for those blokes who get dragged around by their wives with a look of "kill me now" on their face. |
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A different strain of the same problem...when someone behind you has just say, 2 or 3 items and you have a trolley load on the belt. You are keeping the head down, doing your best to avoid eye contact when suddenly bam! they hit you with that the sad puppy eyes expression, gesturing at their few items, saying "Oh look I have 2 items..could I jump in front of you...puurrrleeese?" Fork off!
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mememe • March 16, 2015 3:26 PM GMT
Tesco "Click & Collect" is the way forward, imo. It's free, Mrs mememe sets up collection time a few days ahead and then, quite nonchalantly, it seems, adds stuff to her on-line basket during the next few days. And when the appointed time arrives, (occasionally when the racing is crap) I drive with her to Tesco and sit smugly in my car as the click & collect wallah loads the stuff in the car (all the stuff has already been picked and packed by some octogenarian drone in the middle of the night). I never need to go in the shop, it's a free service, and I never see those unpleasant fat women in leggings with their unhealthy children. Why bother going to fetch it when they'll deliver it to your house at anytime you want? |
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I am particularly puzzled by the self service tills in Morrisons that don't accept £2 coins, but give them out in the change.
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When they open a new checkoot hingmy there is no established etiquette...customers must join the new queue at their own discretion.
In essence, it can be considered as a SUPERMARKET EVENT HORIZON...  |
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The only problem with self service (in Ireland) is that when you buy alcohol, it wont let you proceed with checking-out until your item has been validated by a customer service individual. This usually means me waiting at my self service till, looking like a desperate alcoholic with said bottle in hand, until a spotty kid comes along to validate my item and I can continue.
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People turning up at the self-service with a trolley or an overflowing basket is what pisses me off.
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People turning up at the self-service with a trolley or an overflowing basket is what pisses me off.
Agreed. |
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If you lot weren't so miserable you'd get your wife, girlfriend or boyfriend to do your shopping for you, while you stay at home, or wait in the car.
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Classic Fred
 Well done to all involved |
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good thread, what pisses me off is when people dont have their payment method ready, when that happens I feel like I want to kill someone
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My habit is to go early on Sunday morning, before the tills are open, and hit the tills at 10:00.
What I've learned to watch out for is the supercilious, self righteous tw@t who was at the till before me on three occasions. Don't know what the heck he and the checkout girl are gassing about, but they're determined to drag it out as long as possible. She is incapable of talking and scanning, so after each item there is a long pause before another one goes down. He has three or four stiff sided bags, and her slowness suits him, as he has to be the worlds slowest packer, whilst he deliberates into which bag to put things. Then the bags go in the trolley, with military precision, as a pre-cursor to faffing around in his wallet, and then for her to shut up and tell him the cost. Then the gassing continues, with my failed attempt to crowd his space with my trolley, suggesting that maybe he should just fek off! |
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You lot would have enjoyed checkout etiquette at the branch of Spar I used when I was working in W Germany in the 1980s.
You handed the money to the cashier with a "Bitte schoen," to which she replied "Danke schoen," and accompanied your change with her own "Bitte schoen," to which you must reply "Danke schoen," which triggered a further "Bitte schoen" from the cashier. You'd look behind you and see a queue stretching back to the deli counter(*) and consider that theoretically you could still be having this conversation 30 years later. (*) It was the world's Wurst. |
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I was arrested in W Germany when I went into a newsagent's and demanded to see the owner's papers.
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^^^ very civilized, the British are the most charmless lot.
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Things in Germany are very inefficient and they have no entrepreneurs, thank goodness.
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1. Never, ever go supermarket shopping with women.
2. Buy most of your groceries online and get it delivered. Twice a month is enough if you plan ahead and have a decent sized freezer. 3. For anything else, there's Aldi/Lidl. 4. Go in the morning, between 9 and 10 is best - the trackies are still in their scratchers. I have a 5th rule, but it's purely personal. I have never and will never use a self-service checkout. |
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^ Can be daunting for the technophobe
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Yeah early morning shopping is good but that goes back to my original complaint (in Ireland)...you can not purchase alcohol before 10am. Which then calls for 2 shopping trips, one for groceries and the other for alcohol at a later time in the day.
Happy St Patricks day btw  |
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I dislike when the cashier comments on your groceries.
If I want to buy a basket full of sweets and sh!t, then that's my business. "Oh, having a party?" |
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i blame dale winton.
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I dislike when the cashier comments on your groceries.
If I want to buy a basket full of sweets and sh!t, then that's my business. "Oh, having a party?" Plain pop a box of tampons in,that usually curtails the conversation. |
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BARROWBOY 17 Mar 15 12:15
i blame dale winton. When you're at the checkout and you here the beep..think of the fun you could be having on.... Classic Unemployed 90s Tv  |
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hear*
 No wonder I was unemployable |
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Another reason why I prefer self service (after 10am) is that you don't get 'helped' by one of those charity bag packers. They dont help, they get in the way then you have to tip them afterwards.
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What a bunch of miserable bastards. Go back to the old days before supermarkets, and traipse around all day to lots of different shops instead.
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you tell 'em grammar
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And risk doing a 2 year stretch for scrumping apples
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Spot on spelling. Women today have got it easy.
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Supermarkets should introduce a men-only day once a week. The money they save through increased efficiency could then be spent on topless cashier girls.
Everyone's a winner. |
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that's a bonzer idea Poker
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I find it particularly irritating when, following the obligatory chat about some old bollocks, they then decide something is missing and waddle off back down the aisles to fetch it.
Many is the time I have only trollied about two-thirds of my shopping but, upon spying an empty checkout, thought "fúck it, I'll eat down the pub for three days" That's what blokes do, we're more considerate. |
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People who put loads of change into the self-service, hunting around in handbags, pockets, purses, and come up short of the amount needed. Then they start looking for a debit card or notes.
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That's what blokes do, we're more considerate
_________________ wait until you get stuck behind some old bint with a months worth of coupons cut out from magazines  that's when i walk out |
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what I cant stand in swondering which ones to choose upermarkets is dopey ****s who block up a whole ailse with a trolley stuck sideways while they are gazing at fooking products in a trace like state contemplating which one to choose ,then looking at you as though you are from another planet when you knock your trolley into theirs to move it out of the way so you can pass ,then ther are the other fecking idiots(women ) who after queing up for ages in front of you on the checkout till start engaging the checkout girl in small talk about the fookin weather or fecking x factor or some other life changing issues and that takes up more feckin time then too cap it all the checkout girl says that will be £77.84 please and the dopey b,stard starts rifeling through her shopping bag then her fookin handbag looking for her purse with her credit card in ! "you have been queing for 15 mins love" HAVE IT TOO HAND YOU DOPEY **** "
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Pokermonster 17 Mar 15 15:37
Supermarkets should introduce a men-only day once a week. The money they save through increased efficiency could then be spent on topless cashier girls. Everyone's a winner. Great idea Poker, at my local sainbury's all the cashiers are over sixty  Any other bright ideas  |