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she tied it to a pylon...
...10,000 volts shot up it's @rse and turned it's wool to nylon!
HIC
...10,000 volts shot up it's @rse and turned it's wool to nylon!
HIC
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A man is in the pub with is mates, telling them about hìs latest purchase -a blow up doll. Arent they great? He says. I mean, where else can u find a woman that always looks shocked at the size of your pen1s?
IM BORED FFS
IM BORED FFS
A very drunk paddy met a prostitute up a dark alley. He asks how much for full sex. '£20' she replies 'Ok.' says Paddy an they get down to business. Next min a cop appears and shines his torch in their faces, 'Wots goin on here?' he asks. 'Nothing Officer, I'm just having sex with my wife.' 'Sorry Sir,' apologises the cop, 'I didn't know it was your wife.' Paddy shouts, 'Neither did I till you shone ur fckin torch in her face!' 
Mary had a little lamb,
It´s fleece was black as soot,
And everywhere that Mary went,
The lamb was sure to go the other way.
It´s fleece was black as soot,
And everywhere that Mary went,
The lamb was sure to go the other way.
Mary had a little lamb
She also had a duck
She stood them on the mantlepeice
to see if they
would ffffffall off
She also had a duck
She stood them on the mantlepeice
to see if they
would ffffffall off
There was a young lady named Tuck...
Had the really most frightfully rum Luck;
One day in a Punt...
SHe fell over the front...
Had the really most frightfully rum Luck;
One day in a Punt...
SHe fell over the front...
On the t!ts of a barmaid from Sale,
Was a list of the price of the ale,
Upon her behind, for the sake of the blind,
Was the very same list, but in braille.
Was a list of the price of the ale,
Upon her behind, for the sake of the blind,
Was the very same list, but in braille.
Nymphomaniacal Alice
Used a dynamite stick for a Phallus
Gthey found her vag1na
In North Carolina
AND HER @SRHOLE IN BUCKINGHAM PALACE!!
Used a dynamite stick for a Phallus
Gthey found her vag1na
In North Carolina
AND HER @SRHOLE IN BUCKINGHAM PALACE!!
There was a young girl of Devizes
Who had t!ts of two different sizes
One was so small, it was no good at all.
The other that large, it won prizes.
that´s it, I´m off for a pint
Who had t!ts of two different sizes
One was so small, it was no good at all.
The other that large, it won prizes.
that´s it, I´m off for a pint
There was a young man from Cape Cod
He put his own mom in a pod
His name, it was Tucker
The bugger the fooker
The bleeder the b@stard the sod
He put his own mom in a pod
His name, it was Tucker
The bugger the fooker
The bleeder the b@stard the sod
hey frankel
THERE WAS AN OLD LADY FROM GLUM
SHE MADE A FUNNY NOISE WITH HER BUM
Have you heard it mate ?
THERE WAS AN OLD LADY FROM GLUM
SHE MADE A FUNNY NOISE WITH HER BUM
Have you heard it mate ?
There was a young lady from Tottenham
Who one day at the vicars
She threw off her knickers
Because she said she felt hot in 'em
Who one day at the vicars
She threw off her knickers
Because she said she felt hot in 'em
mary had a little lamb
she put it in a basin
and every time it came out
she'd kick its feckn face in
she put it in a basin
and every time it came out
she'd kick its feckn face in
Jack and Jill went up the hill
so Jack could lick Jill's fanny.
Jack got a shock
and a mouthful of ****
cos Jill's a fckn tranny.
so Jack could lick Jill's fanny.
Jack got a shock
and a mouthful of ****
cos Jill's a fckn tranny.
Jack and jill went up the hill
To fetch a pale of water
Jill came down
With half a crown
But not for fetching water
To fetch a pale of water
Jill came down
With half a crown
But not for fetching water
There was a fresh student at McGill
Who swallowed a nuclear pill
Tney found HER vag1na in SOUTH Carolina
...
AND HER TITS UP A TREE IN BRAZIL!!
Who swallowed a nuclear pill
Tney found HER vag1na in SOUTH Carolina
...
AND HER TITS UP A TREE IN BRAZIL!!
Mary had a little lamb
Her father shot it dead
And now it goes to school with her
Between two hunks of bread.
Her father shot it dead
And now it goes to school with her
Between two hunks of bread.
Frankelstein 30 Sep 11 18:10
@Greg... never heard it...
faaaaaaaaaartblmmumph
@Greg... never heard it...
faaaaaaaaaartblmmumph
A youg ABle Seaman from Torbay
Set sail for China, one day
He was tied to the tiller
by a sex-starved gorilla
AND CHINA'S AN EFFING LONG WAY!!
Set sail for China, one day
He was tied to the tiller
by a sex-starved gorilla
AND CHINA'S AN EFFING LONG WAY!!
mary had a little lamb,
it **** upon the floor
she had it ritualistically slaughtered for halal meat.
it **** upon the floor
she had it ritualistically slaughtered for halal meat.
mary had a little lamb
she kept it in a bucket,
she let it out occasionally
to let the welshmen feed it.
she kept it in a bucket,
she let it out occasionally
to let the welshmen feed it.
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