work colleague had bought a new car (new as in new to him it was a pile of shoite), had a friend who was a local pc coming to meet me for lunch so i suggested when he visited work that we play a prank on my work mate over his car

anyway lunch arrives and i told him a copper was in the car park, he nigh on crapped his pants before he even got to the car, but the copper played a blinder even getting on the radio at one point running some checks, i was struggling to keep a straight face as plod turned the car over, saying that the car was a ringer and the identity had been changed, vin plate removed, engine number filed off etc, although i thought he was taking it a bit too seriously as by now work colleague was looking rather flustered and almost close to tears so i called enough and told him it was a wind up

his look of relief lasted about 5 seconds before plod mate announced that whilst it had started as a joke he was actually serious and the car was probably stolen

My mates sisters are council office cleaners, they nicked  the official headed notepaper.

The recipient of the letter was his elderly uncle, it was about 12/13 years ago.

Dear Mr *****

Since the passing of your wife last year it has come to the councils attention that you have a spare bedroom.

There are two choices, you must opt for one of them.

1) It will mean leaving your friends and neighbours behind, but we can relocate you to a one bedroomed flat in Bow E.3 on a high rise tower block.

2) We can put a family of 4 asians into your spare bedroom to ease the Boroughs housing crisis. 

If you choose option 1)
We may be able to help with your removal expenses.

If you choose option 2)
You must supply 50kgs of rice and a goat each month. The goat will be killed, by you or the asians, on your premises, for food. Upon receipts for the rice and the goat arriving at our offices, you will be fully reimbursed, along with 50% of your gas and electricity bills.

Let us know as early as possible next week what you wish to do.



He got the letter on a Friday upon his return from a short break away and spent all day Saturday and Sunday absolutely seething, and  showing everybody in the local social club.

My mate never told him very late on Sunday night for fear he may have gone to the Housing Department early on Monday morning, and carried out his threat to 'Shove the letter down the coonts throat!!'

Many years ago,when the Saturday National Lottery was on April 1st,a woman at my work recorded the previous week's draw and then bought a ticket with that week's winning numbers and played the recording as the real draw was being made,as a trick on her husband.

I don't recall if she ever mentioned his reaction but had it been me i'd have given her a right proper shagging.

Irish newspaper reported ,that as they were about to join the Eu
they would switch to driving on the right.
It would be phased in, ie first week busses and trucks  would switch
then cars and motorcycles

That's quite funny, M T wallet

I pity you crags.

Like other cambridge punts on here.

MT

Iirc, Tony Blackburn reported something similar back in the 1970s.

There are only two major routes into east London from the east, the A12 and the A13. 

Somebody phoned in and reported that the A13 was blocked solid due to a collapsed flyover.

Blackburn repeated it on traffic news and said to avoid the road altogether. 

The A13 was almost a trouble free ride in the rush hour,  but the A12 came to a standstill at Redbridge with all the rush hour traffic, plus all those dodging the A13.