Drink a Drink a Drink

well may as well drink tonight, it's a saturday

was out in glasgow earlier, pish, cos fat boy fat was there

fat boy fat?

Depends...if you had a good time whilst you were out the night before then it was worth it...if it wasn't very memorable then it wasn't.

aye fat boy fat, fat cvnt that was out, out to get me, fat boy fat cvnt

am gonna batter him on monday

massive insecure cvnt

yeah had a great time last night really good laugh but just could not help to think how many days ive lost to hangovers

^ :^0 the mind boggles

there's always a bad and an evil, outweighs each other

you wanna have a laugh, then you're gonna get sh!t the next day, it always evens out

boring people have, a very boring life

fat boy cvut has a problem with me, hides behind me, but it's gonna even out, he'll get his comeuppance

only just got my nut together, just finished off a kebab and thats me back to norm

hides behind others from me, I mean

where are ye heed the baw? glasgow?

motherwell

is fat boy a mate

Motherwell! I sh@gged a bird off the internet up in Newarthill once!

he was a mate, not any more, can't stand the cvnt, he's a ***** got found out

haha, i tried checking out birds thru that gumtree, spam i tell ye bloody spam

Nothing better than that getting back to normal feeling after a day of sh!te from a hangover imo.

gumtree? heard of it but thought it was for advertising wares rather than ladies bodies

try dating agencies...........don't get too serious with somebody off a dating agency.......find burds, keep it light and you'll get a sh@g

that bird in Newharthill, she give my number to her friend cos she wanted sex as well, dunno if it was a one off or not? as in, I dunno if burds you meet from online sharing numbers is the norm or not?

i don't do the dating agency thing much but every now and again

yep its a great feeling once that hangover goes, tempted to go to the pub but cant be arsed walking

met a** off the net once, met in glasgow, and went back to hers in Maybole

watched Top Gun, and nae sex..............pish

ch!nk

yep gumtree has a dating bit but any ad ive replied to for some good old fashioned sex is always spam. never tried any other dating site coz my mates used them and he never gets any, gets the date and thats it, none of them seem to want a one nighter

anyone know what the name of the drink a drink a drink song is, or who famouslysang it?

so decided not to bother see her anymore but i asked her online, "how many times do I have to meet you to get off with you?"

she replied "about 20 times, am Chinese, you need to woo me, am not a Scottish lass"

thats funny the bird passing your number to her mate they mustve been dirty fooks

lily the pink a pink a pink

the saviour off the human race - thats about all i remember from that song

She must have been a stoater fae Maybole

Scaffold - Lily the Pink

thats a pity heed the baw for yer mate, is he ugly? if so that can be a downside, it does take a bit of effort though, that's why i don't do it often but I don't want to have a girlfriend, so I have to try and find an even balance

I've never tried gumtree and it's not something I thought of, it's if you go to a dating agency that you paid, at least the girl would think "well he paid for the site so he must be looking for something"

I've had funny times from it, once met a bird while peering over a newspaper in that pub in Glasgow Central, Conners or something? ended up going to the SECC thing in January, she was into palm reading reading, pure pish

met a bird up in Dundee once, she never had a pic on the website, but I was in Dundee at the time and I had her number so I texted her asking to meet her, she said yea, so I met her, she was a skinny 50 year old, ugly as **, couldn't wait to get back out

next day, she started showing her f@nny on webcam to me on this computer, she telt me she never had a webcam, lying b!tch

8 fingers, 12 toes

scabby old granny f@nny, naw

heed the baw 14 Nov 23:38
thats funny the bird passing your number to her mate they mustve been dirty fooks

they were, dirty fooks indeed, met the bird at her friend's hoose, there was a guy in there with the home owner, them 2 must've been there to see if I was a dodgy guy or not, but they fvcked after 20 mins and suddenly this burd pushes me down on the settee snogging and wanting to take my trousers off

done it on her friend's bed...next morning, I had a night out arranged in Glasgow so I had to go, asked this burd for a number for a taxi but she wouldn't give me it, her friend got her ned son to take me to a bus stop to back to Motherwell

and I was dressed smart as fvck, me walking with this spotty ned, must've made me look like a drug pusher, thank god no polis cars drove by

nah i wouldnt say my mates ugly but he uses that match.com says hes using it to get his end away but but idont think hes had any joy with it, i think most birds on them sites are looking for more than just a pump

School reunions are a big craze now. Have heard so many stories about**in going on. Thinking of organising one.

plentyfish has some good ones up for it in all areas. Mate has met 2 in Edin to make sure nobody knows him. I have still to pluckupthe courage,prefer just going out + trying to pick up local slapper.

hmm, well is your friend any good at conversing online?........one can try and find with subtlety if the girl is looking for a relationship or a sh@g

I wouldn't be embarrassed, I telt all my friends about it so am not embarrassed, but I once spoke to a woman constantly trying to get her attention, not in a bad way as such, turned out this woman works at the same place as me.........she has given me funny looks when she walks by me but not said anything

there was another bird at work on the site but I figure it out, so I give her email address to my Greek mate, and he managed to get pics of her f@nny and he sent it to me, and I see her walking by me, and I laugh, knowing that I've seen her f@nny, she was a shaven haven, such a pity

i pulled this bird at a festival a few year back. went out into the field for some fun. i was in some nick i dont know how i managed to get it up. anyway was sitting on her back giving her a massage and when i got up i realised i id left a skidmark on her right down her back

haha! is that true? fvcking hell!

without a word of a lie

You manky**t heid the baw

was it at balado?

are women easy there for a fυcking? i've never been into the music scene

i had a bottle of water with me so i emtied it on her and wiped it off, she never knew a thing hahaha

aye was up at t in the park, love my festivals

fυcking hell, i wouldn't have wasted the water on her, I would've drank it to re-hydrate myself from too much bevvying

heed the baw, did you ever use AOL back in the year 2000?

i had to do something couldnt just let go like that plus was giving her a lift back to the train station so couldnt let her in the car knowing what just happened was still on her

AOL nope why u ask

you must've got to know her pretty well then

well back in 2000 when I was 20, I was unemployed for 3 months, so I just started using the pub quiz on AOL, (like a chat room but quizzes as well)

and then so there was a conversation brought up, about where we all lived, and I said I was in Paisley, and there was other bird in the room in Paisley too

so she started talking to me........and eventually she came over to my bit one night.............this is true honest...........she starts sucking my kn0b, and I'm writing on the computer on AOL messenger to her boyfriend, "could you please call a taxi for kerry?"

he replies "what the fυck?" while she's down there sucking it, honest!

ahaha thats very naughty, funny but badass

Swearbox 14 Nov 23:22
Depends...if you had a good time whilst you were out the night before then it was worth it...if it wasn't very memorable then it wasn't.

I agree, I once had a non-memorable night once, and on Monday I got a fone call from some guy saying "Don't fvcking touch my wife ever again!"

not very fair on the boyfriends/husbands is it?

to be honest, kerry said she had hard times with her boyfriend and he treated her like sh!t

that's why I don't feel so bad

he bought me a curry a couple weeks later, he didn't have a clue

plus you were only 20

indeed heed the baw! ;)

she was 30 something

mate just rung my mobile wondering where I am, he can get to fvck

what fat boy

but 2 wrongs dont make a right, surely

haha!, nah a proper mate, but fat boy will be there wae him, but fvck it

theres a bus at 1am that am supposed to be on, fvck them

2 wrongs does make a right for example

Germany did a wrong by invading Poland, so by us starting a war, that makes 2 wrongs, did that make a right?

did that make sense that just boggled me, i aint got the thinking cap on

if someone hits me, i hit back, thats 2 wrongs apparently

but if some country starts a war on another but the country fights back, then its ok?

are you telling me fat boy hit you so you hit him

indeed yea

but it hasn't happened

I wanna hit him first actually

ah feckit, if your gona do it your gona do it,

you could throw a jobby at him

haha, don't wanna get my hands mucky!

poop bags or a stick would be sufficient

they're foning again, fvck them

am gonna send a text, but a poop bag is not fine, I won't involve poop

just sent a text, fone ringing now, fvck them

anyway enjoy punching fat boy, im goin back to bed

i will one day, have a good sleep