Yorky Pud

I was hoping to be able to write a blog entry today about me taking a shot at higher stakes, crushing the game and winning a shed load (for the stakes anyway)) of money. However, something happened last Monday that prevented that from happening. Someone paid me a visit, it was the dreaded Tilt Monster.

Anyone who has ever read any of my blogs will know that one of the biggest hurdles I have been struggling to overcome at the poker tables is keeping tilt at bay. Usually my tilt issues do not see me spunk dozens of stacks away, instead it leads me to chop and change the games I play, which in turn makes me even more disillusioned with the game. Rinse and repeat.

However, last Monday saw me fall of the wagon in spectacular fashion and drop close to nine stacks in one session. All of October I ran like crap, no matter what I did Lady Luck pissed on my chips. Then I started playing pretty badly too, which coupled with Lady Luck making me her bitch, saw me essentially break even and have a very frustrating time at the tables. I was looking forward to starting November on the right foot and well and truly saying goodbye to the previous month but it never happened.

I think it all started when I had aces cracked by 98s all-in preflop and then had AT lose to 82 all-in on a T22 flop. FML. All through October **** like that happened and I simply laughed it off and carried on but this must have tipped me over the edge as I had the bright idea to go play Pot Limit Omaha and the equivalent of seven stacks doing so. Looking at the hands where I lost I look like a complete donkey and God only knows what notes my opponents will have made on me but whatever. To prevent myself from playing, and playing badly, I withdrew my bankroll back to my bank account and took an enforced break.

For the first couple of days I was so angry for allowing myself to go on monkey tilt, especially as I had put in a ton of work to get over the mental side of the game, something that has hindered me from day one. But then I realised that is is not falling down that should be looked at as failure, it is not getting back up and trying again that should be viewed as so. People quitting smoking have a crafty **** and even dieters grab a Greggs whilst out and about their daily business. It does not make them a failure, especially if they manage to reach their end goal of being nicotine-less of less chunky. Blips are to be expected, especially playing short-handed poker, especially playing short-handed poker in the style that I do. I'm still disappointed by the fact I went on tilt but I was always told to not worry about the things you cannot control and as it is now in the past I cannot control it.

I will probably jump right back on the horse tonight once the kids are in bed, as my cashout is now in my account. I have no monetary or volume based goals set though I am going to try and make sure that I play the best I can each session, do not look at my cashier balance or any stats in my Hold'em Manager until I have played a few thousand hands and just let the game go with the flow.

On a side note, only 13 more days until EPT Barcelona!

As always, thanks for reading and best of luck at the tables!