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Willy Shafter the forum nice guy
Willy Shafter the forum nice guy
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Replies: 66
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Has the pedalo pirate been sighted off Cromer yet?
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ty tom and paul..just seen this thread
 look forward to the next meeting. |
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Somalians shot him down mouse
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Cripes, he'll have to swim up the Tyne.
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You could hear the oar beats pound as they raced round and round,
And the clatter of the sails as they spun 'round and 'round. And he sailed into Wallsend street, his skull badge upon his chest, His name was Noxy, and he sailed the fastest rum boat in the west. Now Noxy loved a widow, a ladyboy known as Sue, He lived all alone in Tiddle Lane at number 22. They said he was too good for him, he was haughty, proud and chic, But Noxy got his rum there three times every week. They called him Noxy, (Noxeeeeeeeeeee) And he sailed the fastest rum boat in the west. He said he'd like to bathe in rum, he said, "All right, sweetheart," And when he'd finished work one night he loaded up his yatch. He said, "D'you want it pasturize? 'Cause pasturize is best," He says, "Noxy, I'll be happy if you come over my treasure chest." That tickled old Noxy, (Noxeeeeeeeeeee) And he sailed the fastest rum boat in the west. Now Noxy had a rival, an evil-looking man, Called Willie Shafter from Wallsend and he drove the transit van. He tempted her with his treacle tarts and his tasty wholemeal bread, And when he seen the size of his testicles it very near turned his head. He nearly swooned at his cumberland and he said, "If you treat me right, You'll have hot rolls every morning and crumpets every night." He knew once he sampled his hot squirt cream he'd have his wicked way, And all Noxy had to offer was a pint of rum a day. Poor Noxy, (Noxeeeeeeeeeee) And he sailed the fastest rum boat in the west. One lunch time Willie saw Noxys rum boat outside his door, It drove him mad to find it was still there at half past four. And as he lept down from his van hot blood through his veins did course, And he went across to Noxys boat and didn't half kick its oars Whose name was Oarsy, (Orsyyyyyyy) and they powered the fastest rum boat in the west. Now Noxy rushed out into the street, his gold dubloon in his hand, He said, "If you wanna marry Susie you'll fight for him like a man." "Oh why don't we play cards for her?" he sneeringly replied, "And just to make it interesting we'll have 2 dubloons on the side." Now Noxy dragged him from his van and beneath the blazing sun, They stood there face to face, and Willie went for his gun. But Noxy was too quick, things didn't go the way Willie planned, And a strawberry-flavoured tube of ky jelly sent it spinning from his hand. Now Susie ran between them and tried to keep them apart, And Noxy, he pushed him aside and a tube of ky caught him underneath his heart. And he looked up in pained surprise and the concrete hardened dust, Of a stale greggs pie caught him in the eye and Noxy bit the dust. Poor Noxy, (Noxeeeeeeeeeee) And he sailed the fastest rum boat in the west. Noxy was only 5ft 2, he didn't wanna die, And now he's gone to make deliveries in that rum round in the sky. Where the customers are angels and ferocious dogs are banned, And the rum man's life is full of fun in that fairy, noxy land. But a man's needs are many fold and soon she married Willie, But strange things happened on their wedding night as they lay in their bed. Was that the waves a-crashing? Or the hinges of the gate? Or Noxys ghostly gold dildo a-rattling in his mate ? They won't forget Noxy, (Noxeeeeeeeeee) And he sailed the fastest rum boat in the west. |
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He needs to start courtsiding at Ffos Las. I want a freebie
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No way would the taffia stand fer that.
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Wouldn't last 5 minutes in Llanelli.
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Notice wullie only seems to sort the posher, better educated, wealthier forum user out. (Dealer, shears)
Notice mart only seems to sort the thicker , less. educated, scruffier forum user out. ( ghost , gregg ) |
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welcome anytime briggs..
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Cheers wullie I will take u up on that sometime.
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Can’t hide class wullie.
Hoping mart might buy me youngest a new pair of trainers after reading this |
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ask him the morra
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High Teck?
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diadora
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Lonsdale
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Winfield pumps
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Fat Mike owns 3 of those companies i think
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mart*
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Gayer thread imo.
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Seriously would be definitely be interesting to see the "in-runners" in action. Think I have had two in running bets (both lost).
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Dealer did u send him a card , you known shearer for years who has know stevie for years your not going say anything are u
He still a prat on here thread spoiling at every opertunity , embarrasing You meeer someone for 5 min you think u know them please spare me As him why he does not drink or shy he can’t go abroad  |
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I have to agree here I'm a total knobhead but I've pulled the wool over skinto and gutfeelings eyes
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Nah we knew but we overlooked it cause we're good people
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As him why he does not drink or shy he can’t go abroad
more absolute cringe from the fat balding doylem. |