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Tip 1, If you cannot afford the bubbly at Royal Ascot purchase a soda stream fountain and add fiz to the cheaper stuff.
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Tip 2, If you are unsure of what to wear at the cheltenham festival a simple solution is to pop your finest chinos and best white shirt in the wash with a selection of clothes dyes.
the resulting "COLOUR" will fit in well, but do try to use orange reds and pinks, the older you are the pinker you go.
the resulting "COLOUR" will fit in well, but do try to use orange reds and pinks, the older you are the pinker you go.
In addition to the clothes at festival make sure that the shoes you wear clash with the rest of your attire.
TIP 3, If you can not afford the ascot drinks but are a bit of a cheap t4rt and need to be drunk, buy the kids binoculars that squirt water and fill with asda value vodka, or meths. you will look like a pro.
Infact if you are like the woman I bumped into there with said article you will look like a pro in more ways than one, and possible get so drunk you wet yourself like she did.
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