Dear STAN ...

Poor stuff sow :(

soul of shi imo :-(

Soul of wit - oh dear . Not living up to your username with that effort i'm afraid .

stake: (ah) soul of sh"t, surely.

custard: apologies for lowering the tone, couldn't resist.

first time I've read this, absolutely fantastic

Gene Hackman 16 Jan 17:17


Fella at work had a boy last year.Called it STAN.
I laughed.
It's true.He did.



:0

Does he deserve a rhyme today ?:|

BEN 10 - Just working on it !

:D

Have taken the 33-1 myself, nice to see you Custard !!!

Will Venetia have him fully tuned on his first start back for her iyo?

Dear Stan
Hi hows it going man ?
i didnt expect to see you before cheltenham
you finished 4th in this race last year
but your out of form now i fear
your priced up as a 33-1 shot
can you land a final big pot ?
you only have 8 rivals to beat
just finish in the first 3 we need to eat
but most of all jump safely around
and come back safe and sound

Who knows Ben, if he is, then off this mark there is no reason why he wont be thereabouts, as i said on the other fred, you can chuck his efforts on soft or heavy into the bin, and hes won after seemingly bad performances.

Nice one CC ;)

Possibly worth a small punt today and will be watching closely.

today won't be the day though will it....

zil /ben , hi , i'm just hoping STAN shows a bit of the old sparkle today .
I think a few of todays other runners are having a prep race for the national and he shouldn't be a 33-1 no-hoper . cc .

Dear Stan
you are not the man
second name James
third name sham

Who's in for a little tickle on the old boy? The boy Challoner could be just the lad for him imo.

Potential thread carnage here!

Good luck custard, hope he runs well for you.

Dear Stan
No show again i'm afraid to say
maybe you should be lay of the day
at least i knew my fate after a mile
i knew then you wouldn't make me smile
retirement could be a few weeks away
standing in a field munching on hay
or maybe one more run at aintree
whatever will be will be
i was hoping for 2 weeks in the bahamas
but im sitting here in my pyjamas .

LOL

:^0

Quality!!!!!!!!!

How are you man?
youre out for a day at the festival
the racing is the very best of all
youre now running over3 miles
if you win this ill be all smiles
im not expecting a great deal
but maybe you can provide one final thrill
im going to invest my few pound
just come back safe and sound

Good luck cc. Great thread.

STAN, Don't you DARE...........

Dear Custard
This is your best buddy Stan
I want to thank you again man
I know i've gone downhill these days
You'd have made a packet with plenty place lays
What I was i'm not that force
but i'll do my best for the cause
i'd have to be at my very best
if i'm to over come this test
To win this race would be a dream
now go and enjoy yourself a custard cream

Hi far from trouble
i think ive burst my bubble
but ill try my best for custard
look out for the flat , his tips are mustard
i think i will retire in a few weeks time
put my feet up with a vodka & lime
look out for me on channel four
ill be peering out of my stable door

Dear Stan
i hope you are safe & well man
you showed a bit more life yesterday
until a mile out when you dropped away
you were in the first 3 at halfway
i thought you were gonna make my day
the distance was too far we all know that
but when i see you next ill give you a pat
until then put youre feet up
im off to pick the winner of the coral cup

ttt .

Dear Stan
i hope you are well man
your owner as invited me to liverpool
sadly i'm working ,oh what a fool
i hear it's gonna be your last outing
so i'll be watching on tv doing some shouting
it's a shame i can't be there in person
if i could i'd bring paul merson
so just jump around and enjoy yourself
i'll keep your photo on my shelve

Dear Custard
Stan here once again man
On Thursday i'll run the best I can
It might not be good enough to win this race
But i'm happy as long as myself I don't disgrace
I return to the scene of my biggest success to date
At 25/1 the bookies thought I was great
It's the llast race of my career
And afterwards i'll enjoy a cool beer
I'm sure there'll be a few tears that you'll weep
But for now i'm off to get me some sleep

Dear Stan
Hi it's custard your biggest fan
it looks like this is gonna be your last race
i just hope you don't sink without trace
thanks for all the wonderful times
i'm glad youre retiring i'm running out of rhymes
youre the outsider in the race
but i'll be backing you win and place
it's a shame i can't come and see you run
it would have been a great deal of fun
so do your best it's only 2 miles
if you make the frame i'll be all smiles

so farewell to these our favourite poems
For once , a thread with lack of moans
Custard cream the last romantic
and far from trouble (a bit pedantic)
and the owner with graceful song
becomes the man to right those wrongs
All ends well, stan's last flings
tomorrow when the fat lady sings

:x

Be class if he runs a good race, poor race so chance at a price hopefully

Dear STAN,
how was it in Liverpool man ?
you ended up 6th so no disgrace
you came home safe from the race
that was the last time you will perform
taking it easy now will be the norm
its been great following your career
i will toast you tonight with a beer
i started following you over 5 years ago
back then you weren't so slow !
on 6 occasions you made those bookies pay
you even won on my birthday
but father time catches up with us all
so its retirement now you will have a ball
i'm sure Aidan will find you a new playmate
the sun will be shining life will be great
so its goodbye to my old friend Stan
have a nice long life from your biggest fan .


STAN

39 runs

6 wins

5 seconds

5 thirds .

CCK, just got home from Aintree and thought he ran well 6th, jockey said he would have been fourth if not hampered in straight first time.
VW and jockey think strongly he has a race in him, I am not so sure but they have pleaded with me to reconsider retirement.
He is still enjoying the job but wish he could talk mate....what do u think....difficult given he loves the job and he is a long time in a field
....entered at Cheltenham next week.....

Hi Paul ,
I hope you had an enjoyable day at Aintree .
As for Stan ,obviously you are the owner and
the one that pays the bills so the final word should
be yours .
He may have finished 4th or 5th this afternoon
without the interference but he would still have
been beaten a long way .
I've had a look at the entries for wednesdays race
at Cheltenham and i honestly couldn't see him being
involved in the finish unless the race cuts up badly .
If Stan is feeling well in himself and VW thinks he is
still up to it then who am i to say otherwise -she's
trained a lot more winners than me !
I would sleep on it tonight and then have another chat
with VW over the weekend .

All the best , Rob .

Like you I am struggling to see what he can do but VW is staying at our house for the 3 days over Aintree and she is usually spot on and with all respect is the best women in the world at what she does !!.....(coming from the man who took him away from her last year)
Stan was full of beans today, Daryl Jacobs confirmed that he has plenty to offer so I guess we move on with him.....only time will tell whether he goes out on a high.
He will never point to point or hunter chase and to be frank as long as he enjoys himself he can continue.....this year at least.
When I am totally convinced he is either hating the game or cannot compete I will pull up stumps and he will retire to Ireland.
He really is a lucky horse in that his girl Sarah, VW, AC and the CCK not to mention his owner think the world of him.
In this sport it is about opinions and I hope I do not rue not retiring him.....only time will tell

Hi Paul,

If you see this i'd give him one more shot at Cheltenham on wednesday if he's fit and well as i think it's the first race he's had a fair while where everything is perfect in him. It seems key that Aidan Coleman rides him looking at the form and would honestly think he has a massive EW chance if a few of the top ones come out (looks like they will) and AC rides him. I've kind of outlined by argument in a thread i've just started called '*** Cheltenham April Meeting - Old Favourites***", though obviously what's best for the horse comes first. He's been a pleasure to follow as i'm sure he has been to own.

Good luck on whatever route you choose to follow.

Apologies to not respond but been away.
VW likes this race tonight having won it regularly before and hopefully Stan will go well tonight.
Like you I felt Wednesday was perfect but she knows best....lets hope so !!

Dear Stan
how you feeling man ?
you were set for a journey across the irish sea
but there's been a re - think and it's now plan B
only 8 rivals to take on tonight
i know you will put up a brave fight
are you gonna give us one last thrill ?
all guns blazing up that hill
you are the best horse in the race
i will back you win and place

Dear Stan
i hope you are ok man
you ended up fourth of eight
you tried your best but it wasn't great
i think the time as come to call it a day
get over to ireland and relax with some hay
thanks for all the fun over the years
i would hate to see it all end in tears .

Dear Stan
hows it going man ?
it's time for yet another race
i'll back you to win and not the place
only 6 rivals to worry about
i think you may have a shout
so its off to wales to try and win
i hope my ticket doesn't end up in the bin

Dear Stan
Don't think i've backed you before
I guess from me that's pretty poor
But i'll put a few quid on tonight
At Aintree you showed some of that fight
I would have a big smiling face
If you could win this pretty average race
Let's go out with a win for Venetia's team
And not forgetting your biggest fan, Custardcream

Dear Stan
I know I've never backed you before,
but thats because you're pi$$ poor.
I think its about time you won a race,
because poor custard is losing face.
Whilst its true you are no Mon Mome,
surely this time you can beat the ambulance home.
Imagine the shock if you get first place,
i'll end up with egg on my face!


;)

dear stan
you've got the added wt of fft
i'll guess we'll have to wait and see
i hope this does'nt burst your bubble
carrying mug money from that man trouble
he really is a bit of w@nk
with too much money in the bank.
:^0

both reported

trev :^0

:^0

noooooooooooooooooooo !!

unlucky Stan

SSSOOOO CLOOSSEEE :(

well done old boy.

:(

Agony :(

!!!!!!!

that big summer race at Market rasen could be his thing.

I'm sure this hoss can win once more
A flickering light of years before
But more than capable at this level
This grissly old tenacious devil
Will once again grace winners enclosure
Before the racing days are over.

Dear Stan
You really should have won tonight,
but instead you lost you pile of shyte!
I hope the retire you soon,
cuz the last time you won there was a blue moon.
I feel sorry for poor old custard,
because you really aren't the mustard.
Enjoy your years eating grass,
but don't get as fat as FFT's a$$.

:p

X-(

:^0 :^0 :^0

:^0

:p

:x

Cracking thread :)

Apologies for lowering the tone, all in good humour :p

Dear down
This is Stan here you dough-peek-hunt
I don't like the way you pulled that stunt
I can see you don't like me very much
But honestly, I couldn't give a flying f**k
FFT can see why you're picking on him a bit
You're still seething cause you didn't back Don't Push It
You really should get over that now
P.S. I've really got my claws out here. MEOW

Dear Stan
well what can i say man ?
you so nearly got back up and won
and i would have a nice ton
but it just wasn't meant to be
so it's beans on toast for tea
but at least you showed some fight
it was so nearly a special night
if only you had gone just that little bit faster
but not to worry , i'm a postie so i saved on postmaster
that was probably youre last ever race
so it certainly wasn't no disgrace
have a nice retirement out to grass
i'll give you a carrot if i ever pass .

custard

your Stan posts have given me more pleasure than almost anything ever put on the forum. Well done mate, and give fido a carrot from me when you pass him,.

Cry - thanks , i do my best .

:x excellent post lads... and Down , your talents are wasted... winner looked to me to have a bit in hand...one to follow over summer...

I was cheering for Stan ...unlucky man

ttt

A tough retirement this I must say

Dear Stan
i see you're out again man
it's a step back in trip i'm not sure it will suit
but i hope you win i'm running out of loot
i'm sure retirement is still part of the plan
so just do the very best you can
i think this could be the very last time
it's obvious you are well past your prime
but most of all come back safe and sound
i'm off to invest my pound

Dear Stan
well you did your best man
you travelled well but couldn't quicken up
sadly you owner won't be collecting a cup
i think you should call it a day
now's a good time , in early may
the summer is approaching fast
i don't want to see you finish last
so it's off back to the stables to have a nap
a then find ireland on your map

shaddow you are a ledgend top thread

Custard,what can i say,your threads and loyalty are fantastic.Bless the lil fella,he's done you proud.
Really enjoyed reading the fun

Custard, its not over yet as your boy will run on Sunday with the aim of putting him spot on for the Summer Plate next Sarurday. Trainer is happy with him and he will bow out at Market Rasen...honest, although I do accept I said this earlier in April
I know many will think he should have ran his last race and indeed they may be right, but he really does love the job and VW is the last trainer in the world to run a horse on the wrong ground or when he is not right. He loves good ground and is not getting any faster so logically cannot compete in the winter with his best chance this summer (we were never going to let him off and bring him back again after a break) in his case his final race over 2m 6 at MR. Stan would love it if you could make it, if not no worries...all the best

Dear Stan
It's off to Stratford for a blow out
the trip is short but your in with a shout
i hope your not as big as a shire
reading the above you sound like a non-trier
so enjoy the day in the summer sunshine
i'll be watching on ATR with a bottle of wine
there's one more race next weekend
so take it easy my horsey friend

Dear Stan

Have fun chasing home Passato
I hope you run faster than a frozen tomato
You mite finish with a late rare rattle
If not back to the field with the hairy cattle
All in all i wish you the best Stan
Do it for your number 1 fan Custardcream man

Boooom

dear stan
why dont they put you out to grass
you dont enjoy being last.
i will have a word the trainer
you need a rest..its a no brainer.

Dear Stan

How you feeling man ?
i was sad to see you pull up yesterday
fingers crossed everything is ok
will you still be running this weekend
or is this the end my 4 legged friend ?
i hope you are feeling better in yourself
i'm just concerned for your health

Dear Stan

Well here we are man
today is your last ever race
its 2m 6f you should go the pace
i'll be watching on channel four
just get around safe dont hit the floor
its been great following your career
but now retirement day is near
so its just one more race to go
go fast man don't go slow

Dear Stan,

Hope you retire well,
Lie in the hay in a dingly dell,
But one thing I have to ask
Is today, just don't do your task
I've gone have had a lay of you
I'm sure you want to have a slow race too
Look after yourself we all like you
Go out and do what you do

good luck Stan..come back safe old chum

Dear Stan,

Thank you for being the man
You stuck to the masterplan
Grand Slam Hero may have won
But we all respect what you have done
So off to paddock to eat some hay
Maybe a gallop on some day
Youve given us all a lot of fun
We'll never forget what you have done

Dear Stan

I hope you are ok man
that was your final ever race
you finished 9th but couldn't go the pace
so it's off to Ireland for a rest
you deserve it after giving your best
i've followed you throughout the years
im relieved it didn't end in tears
so it's a fond farewell that i bid
but at least i still have custard cream kid

Stan has had more retirements than George Foreman [:o]

Well Custard the old boy pulled up well this morning and goes off to Ireland on Thursday. Ownership has been transfered to young Aidan Coleman who loves the horse for very good reason even though some say he may have cost him a Grand National win...now that is love !!
For me many fond memories particularly new year at Cheltenham, a course record at Aintree and of course your thread which like Stan has stood the test of time and is a credit to the horse and you.
Good luck with the Kid

Hi Paul ,
He is retiring in one piece to enjoy a happy
and hopefully long retirement and that's the main thing .
New's year day at Cheltenham was my personal highlight
of Stans career .It was a pity he couldn't win just one
more time after that but it wasn't meant to be and like
all of us time catches up .
Have a great time in Ireland STAN

Dear Stan

You're retired now man!
no more work for you in the early morning
a whole new lifestyle is about to be dawning
after 45 races it's time to quit
so put away that racing bit
6 times you came in first
on new years day my wallet burst
so it's one final little rhyme
go and enjoy your retirement time .

Top class thread and thanks CC64 for all your 'ditties' over the years, top class

End of an era with Stan now being retired

up for winkle

Dear Stan

How's it going man ?
You're retired and out to grass
I'm here sitting on my ar5e
sitting quietly passing the time
thinking of some words that rhyme
you did your best in all your races
punters pulled some funny faces
custard followed you all the way
and lives to bet another day
we cheer, we shout, we even swear
some of us even ride the chair
we raise our arms as if to whip
and pray that you don't jump and slip
you jump the last and we give a cheer
'GO ON MY SON - THE LINE IS NEAR'
we win, we lose, we have our dream
just like your mate custard cream.

Lovely thread 

I would urge anyone who has not seen it to see the video of 'Stan' by Eminem and read the words of the song, you will enjoy the thread more.  I am not a fan of rap, but this one is great.

nice won CC et al