People in supermarkets

Send your butler out for your goods instead then

Seriously though.. I was in Tesco's this morning and this soppy old ba$tard continually blocked my way.It was like he was doing it on purpose.If i moved to the left he moved to the right.If i went to take an item off the shelf he was right on my shoulder..it was like being stalked and to top it all off he was behind me at the checkout..as i putting my items on the conveyor belt he began to put his clobber on the belt without using a divider hence all my shopping got muddled up with his..fcking idiot.

I'm in a bad mood today

'better to be ready if you rattle my cage'   

Your going to tell me next he put his blue coin in the same charity slot as you?

shocking to know people still shop at Tesco"s

I've done nearly a full tour today, Tesco, Asda and Iceland.............Lidl tomorrow morning

Always shop in the afternoons. The (mostly old/much older than me) annoying people, who get in the way, have to be home for their lunch.

I feel sorry for the old and aint looking forward to it myself,watched a documentary about care home abuse moving to say the least

I used to shop through the night for a couple of years nice relaxed atmos,now I shop to fill in time what a boring **** I am

yes, avoid the mornings to avoid the coffin dodgers

I like Sainsbury's - keeps the riffraff out of Waitrose.

Probably 'upskirting' you.

OP drives a motability scooter (NAP)

he began to put his clobber on the belt without using a divider

Always start loading your stuff right at the very end off the conveyer belt and remain there until the belt moves down to make more room for your goods.

Never give up the end position, otherwise some dead brain will start loading their stuff behind you and take your space.

You seem to meet many ignorant people Dr, what with the queue farting and conveyor hogging. Do you live in The Stan?

I think I can put up with a few plebs when I go shopping saddo.
Good grief man, I expect I'll probably bump into you one day.

Easy to get your own back if they say "One day you will be old and decrepit like me"! Answer" I will never be like you. I have money to take me to Dignitas in Switzerland if I show any signs of it!"

Early morning shopper here.  Never see me in one after 9am - unless I'm getting bevvy.  Too many coonts everywhere otherwise.

Surely if you go late afternoon you will be trampled by the hordes following the assistant with the mark down price gun?

There is a gang of quite vicious old ladies at M+S in Leeds who follow the sticker man round and would have your eye out for a pain au chocolat.

Easy to get your own back if they say "One day you will be old and decrepit like me"! Answer" I will never be like you. I have money to take me to Dignitas in Switzerland if I show any signs of it!"


Ah yes the old "I'd top myself before I got to that state"

Funny how hardly anyone does it?

Shame really we could have a whip round if we thought you'd do it.

TBF Baron most people that would do it are in no condition to do it .. when the time comes ..

Thanks for the support Mr Case. Most on here couldn't have a whip round to buy a penny chew because according to BetFair's figures of a few years ago, about 1.11% of punters on here make consistent profits. And on a serious note- more do it than you think, it's just not reported because it is illegal to assist. The clever ones are those who make the trip just before the time comes.

Last week I heard a teenage girl ask her mum if prunes were meat.

I like to put products into other people's trolley that I think they'd like as a surprise.

Sainsbury's self service checkout beat me again today. Total came to £2.60, I put 10p in and 3x£ coins, gave me 2x20p and 2x5p back. Those machines are incapable of reason.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IWwCj-GPel0