Chit Chat
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23 Jan 16
22:44
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Date Joined:
28 Jun 10
Let's say you hadn't been drinking and a genie popped out of a bottle in front of your eyes and said he could grant you either a huge pecker and every woman you met wanting some of your sausage or alternatively £10 million in cash. Which would you go for?
Those in that position with both pecker and money are excused from answering of course.
Those in that position with both pecker and money are excused from answering of course.
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Replies: 29
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The cash will usually pay for the women.
With the money I'd diversify a bit and also start an absolutely rubbish failing hotel, with zero customers, just so I could have a visit from a well-known suited and booted Inspector, to receive a richly-deserved verbal onslaught. Ideally followed by "Dahhhling". |
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You're a cunning old devil alun but with the sausage and unconditional aquiescence she wouldn't just be ringing your door bell. Ding dong.
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The cash. I've already got a huge pecker.
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Only £10 million? Bit of a skinflint that genie.
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neither.... Just a request for the good & great of chit chatters to enjoy 5 glorious days in a hospitality box at Royal Ascot ...10 million may just cover it mind !
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Yes but at your age how much wood do you have to splint it with kenny? Think of the environment?
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Zero wood these days. **** the environment. It would go nto several cat rescue centres, minus a few grand to keep me in viagra.
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Those ffyfes boxes could yet come in handy.
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I must agree though. Once me and the missus were comfortable I suspect the rest would go on animals.
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I'd take the money and buy Facts a bigger home so he could take in even more immigrants.
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There's no suspecting with me mate. That's exactly where it would go. Sadly though, even though I use my pro gambler skills to supplement my meagre pensions, I will never get anywhere near that.
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Nor me kenny but you can't buy happiness and you can't buy the love of a good animal.
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when you say animals do you mean politics forum ?
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I refer to that by it's more accurate name of the mad house Capt.
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I'd take the money and buy Facts a bigger home so he could take in even more immigrants.
He would be living the dream with his 72 virgins, all 20 year old males from Syria. |
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My wife got one of these wishes but unfortunately for her the genie was hard of hearing. Well that's what she told me when a handsome lad turned up at the door with a twelve inch clock for her.
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Easy one this I'd just wish I had a million wishes.
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A little bit off subject - but a GENIE Joke ...
So this man walks into a Pub, he's got a PARROT on his shoulder and he's holding hands with a DWARF. Goes up to the Bar- put's his hand in his pocket pulls out a big wad of cash and orders.. A gin and tonic for me please Landlord , fruit juice for the PARROT and a pint of Lager for the DWARF. He knocks back the Gin, the PARROT swigs the fruit juice, the DWARF takes a couple of slurps from the Lager and spills the rest of it all over a customers head !!! Man boll ocks the DWARF...makes his excuses to the customer and buys the irrate customer a large one. Man returns to the Bar and orders another round .. A gin and tonic for me please Landlord , fruit juice for the PARROT and a pint of Lager for the DWARF. He knocks back the Gin, the PARROT swigs the fruit juice, the DWARK takes a couple of slurps from the Lager and this time a poor woman customer get's the Lager all over her lap ! She goes nuts ...anyway Man placates her ...buys her a couple of doubles,bungs her a few quid and Man returns to the Bar to order another round. Now the Landlord having seen all this is not happy at all ...and says to the guy .. Listen mate - what's going on ? ...you come in here with a PARROT on your shoulder holding hands with a DWARF !!! I mean c'mon looks bleedin strange dunnit ? Man replies ...well you won't beleive this but ...I was in this antique shop and saw this rather nice old looking .... LAMP. When I got it home ..I started cleaning it ...rubbing it like ...and out pops this phucking GENIE .. Anyway ...GENIE says most gratefully ...thanks for releasing me for that you can have three wishes.. MMmm I thought yeahhhh right well OK I'll give it a try (Landlord now most intrigued) ... Landlord says ..."well what did you wish for" Man says .. Well my first wish was for Lots of MONEY ...and look whenever I put my hand in my pocket I can pull out a wad of cash .. Yes says the Landlord - what next ? Man says for my second wish ...I want a fabulous bird ...and I got a bleedin PARROT !!! Landlord says ...well what about the DWARF ??? Man says ...for my third wish - I asked for a two foot prick ...and I got this phuckin DWARF !!!... |
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Never read the op properly so I'll get back in my box, but I would go for the cash.
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Was to Crisp....oc |
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I'd wish I had infinity wishes. We all know that.
It’s the second wish that is important. If you are ever given a wish by a supernatural creature, such as a goblin or an unplugged fairground fortune-telling machine, then your second wish has to be - ‘I wish that none of my future wishes, including this one, will be misunderstood or misconstrued in any way, to give consequences that were not what I intended. Nor that if I use the phrase 'I wish' as a figure of speech in every day conversation, will that wish be granted. In fact, every time you think I have made a wish, I would like a written contract to appear, detailing the exact consequences of my wish, from now until the end of time, so I can check that there are no tricks and traps in it. Only when I am happy with it and have signed the contract will the wish come true. |
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Have you been reading Stephen King?
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but getting back to the original question I'd go for the money as I've never had a problem with my small penis.
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what a massive anti-climax of a punchline that was
anyway, back to the original question, the money obviously. women want your dosh not your d1ck |
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Good reply. All blokes with lots of money seem to be attractive to women. A mate of mine bought a Porshe. He is by his own admittance middle aged, small ,fat, balding and ugly. Women were all over him until he sold the car and became invisible to them again.
Bernie Ecclestone, Rupert Murdoch Mick Hucknall etc |
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we live in a perfect balanced world, where
men try to get into womens knickers women try to get into mens wallets |
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I did get a wish from a genie once
Asked for a c0ck that touched the floor Fecker cut my legs off |