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I became cavalier and careless, and, anyway - let me set the scene ...
4 years ago I bought £30 Phillips Hairdressing Shears fro Amazon and have done my own since (I hate going to have my hair cut and I hate even more having to pay £20 to be tortured). Started cautiously and it used to take me ages - but ok results and Mrs mememe impressed. Got better and better and slightly more adventurous, with very passable reults.
Then, this morning DISASTER. I had given myself a pre-Christmas tidy up, but wasn't too happy, so I planned to take a bit more off after the hols.
This morning I prepared myself mentally (a bit like them high divers do before taking the plunge) stood in the shower cubicle, shearer in hand (no, not Alan Shearer before some chit chat wag responds) - I cut my hair in the shower cubicle so that Mrs mememe doesn't shout about hair being all over the place - buzzzz and a clump of hair falls to the floor. Fookin hell, I thought, that's a lot of hair - and it was. Gulp. The shearer has a guard that stops you cutting your hair too short (supposedly). Never happened before - just carelessness. I think I've recovered the situation and should be able to go out with Mrs mememe for Valentine's Day meal, just not yet.
4 years ago I bought £30 Phillips Hairdressing Shears fro Amazon and have done my own since (I hate going to have my hair cut and I hate even more having to pay £20 to be tortured). Started cautiously and it used to take me ages - but ok results and Mrs mememe impressed. Got better and better and slightly more adventurous, with very passable reults.
Then, this morning DISASTER. I had given myself a pre-Christmas tidy up, but wasn't too happy, so I planned to take a bit more off after the hols.
This morning I prepared myself mentally (a bit like them high divers do before taking the plunge) stood in the shower cubicle, shearer in hand (no, not Alan Shearer before some chit chat wag responds) - I cut my hair in the shower cubicle so that Mrs mememe doesn't shout about hair being all over the place - buzzzz and a clump of hair falls to the floor. Fookin hell, I thought, that's a lot of hair - and it was. Gulp. The shearer has a guard that stops you cutting your hair too short (supposedly). Never happened before - just carelessness. I think I've recovered the situation and should be able to go out with Mrs mememe for Valentine's Day meal, just not yet.
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Yes, indeedy Crisp ... and you can't stick it back on 
I'll just tell my daughters' that it's the new retro punk look
I'll just tell my daughters' that it's the new retro punk look
Lol... I do mine with clippers, beard too. The lot off every 3 or so days. It will grow back pal.
Kenny,
No, not bald ... but a lot balder than yesterday ...
I call it the tufty look
No, not bald ... but a lot balder than yesterday ...
I call it the tufty look
I bumped into a pal of mine one day in the supermarket, and he looked like something off Schindler's List.
So I said very quietly so as not to embarrass him in front of everybody
'' WHAT THE HELL HAVE YOU DONE TO YOUR HAIR!''
He'd said he'd started to cut it without the hair length thing on and gone straight back to his scalp, so he had to cut it all off to match.
So I said very quietly so as not to embarrass him in front of everybody
'' WHAT THE HELL HAVE YOU DONE TO YOUR HAIR!''
He'd said he'd started to cut it without the hair length thing on and gone straight back to his scalp, so he had to cut it all off to match.
Started cutting my own hair about 10 years ago. Used to do it every 6 weeks then every month now every 2 weeks. Should be doing it every week but can't be arsed.
lol I do my own too. One of my fears is the guard will fall off and I'll look like one of the Mitchell brothers 
I was revenged for shaving my mates eyebrow off in my early 20's by having a band about two inches wide shaved from ear to ear over the top of my head one night after a drunken escapade. What can you do? I shaved the rest off and quite liked it given I was so handsome. I've just kept it shaved close for the last 25 years and never bothered with a hairdresser asking me where I'm going on holiday.
I've just kept it shaved close for the last 25 years and never bothered with a hairdresser asking me where I'm going on holiday.
I think the lasses at Uni thought I was a bit of rough and seemed to enjoy giving the stubble a bit of a rub. Never refuse any reasonable requests. 
mememe you dopey imbecille!!! imagine....................................
Doing what I did 3 months ago, except I was even worse, I had cut mine then noticed a bit long at the back and ran the clippers up the back all the way to my forehead, and had forgotten I had removed the guard to clean the trimmers to put it back in it's case. What a dopey plank. 
I had a fckin reverse Mohican!!! it nearly grown back another 3/4 weeks will do it, btw the sides grow really quickly and have been trimmed this week without mishap, the already thinning top taking much longer. Happy New Year. 
Doing what I did 3 months ago,
except I was even worse, I had cut mine then noticed a bit long at the back and ran the clippers up the back all the way to my forehead, and had forgotten I had removed the guard to clean the trimmers to put it back in it's case. What a dopey plank. I had a fckin reverse Mohican!!! it nearly grown back another 3/4 weeks will do it, btw the sides grow really quickly and have been trimmed this week without mishap, the already thinning top taking much longer.
Happy New Year.
A real man would use a pair of Nicky Clarke scissors and a mirror.
Jan 5, 2016 -- 8:16PM, doantwin2easy wrote:
A real man would use a pair of Nicky Clarke scissors and a mirror.
Quite right!
Boxing ... happy new year to you too!
In all my life, I can't remember a more heart-stopping moment than when with my first swoop a big pile of hair - my hair -fell on the floor.
I felt sick ... what should I do?
No choice ... plough on ... and stay in for 3 weeks!
The mad thing is - when you've done it, it stays done .
A bit like losing your viginity ... it can't be undone.
In all my life, I can't remember a more heart-stopping moment than when with my first swoop a big pile of hair - my hair -fell on the floor.
I felt sick ... what should I do?
No choice ... plough on ... and stay in for 3 weeks!
The mad thing is - when you've done it, it stays done .
A bit like losing your viginity ... it can't be undone.
Yes the sick feeling sounds too familiar. Baseball caps have been my friends since then. 
just got to the point where wearing them is optional.
just got to the point where wearing them is optional.
And to you sir. May the fruits of your loin continue to spring forth like East German long jumpers.
Cutting his own hair hasn't done Boris Johnson any harm.
I assume things have moved on since the Ronco hair trimmer, which was basically a razor blade in a comb!
she uses the Remington Fuzzaway Turbo
noticed a bit long at the back and ran the clippers up the back all the way to my forehead
That's known as a "Reversed Mohican"....becoming even more popular at the mo!
That's known as a "Reversed Mohican"....becoming even more popular at the mo!
Update ...
Showered this morning and hair not grown much on the side that's been intimate with the shears!
Got a golf club dinner tomorrow night (yes, I know, thinly veiled etc, etc) ... my conundrum is this ... golf caps, hats whatever are not allowed to be worn in the club house, but there are no rules about the dining room.
So should I wear my bobble hat (it's got no bobble, btw) or a baseball cap
or should I wear something stiking and, well, a bit racy, such as a fedora ... a la Malcolm Allison?
Showered this morning and hair not grown much on the side that's been intimate with the shears!
Got a golf club dinner tomorrow night (yes, I know, thinly veiled etc, etc) ... my conundrum is this ... golf caps, hats whatever are not allowed to be worn in the club house, but there are no rules about the dining room.
So should I wear my bobble hat (it's got no bobble, btw) or a baseball cap
or should I wear something stiking and, well, a bit racy, such as a fedora ... a la Malcolm Allison?
mememe....I don't think that the headwear issue applies to kitchen staff and servers....
All you do it walk in there shouting "who sliced the ball off the tee on hole 4" and then point to the missing hair.
First thing you should do is ring Trading Standards. Imagine being sold a bobble hat and taking it home only discover it's got no bobble. 
He cut it long he cut it short - cut it with a knife and fork.
Thanks to you all for the helpful suggestions ...
The NITS one is not a bad idea and got me thinking
Maybe I should get a red marker pen and put lots of red dots on the side of my head. I'll get one of 2 reactions:
1. sympathy and free drinks, OR
2. a table all to myself (with Mrs mememe)
The NITS one is not a bad idea and got me thinking
Maybe I should get a red marker pen and put lots of red dots on the side of my head. I'll get one of 2 reactions:
1. sympathy and free drinks, OR
2. a table all to myself (with Mrs mememe)
Avoid the red marker at all costs!!, just for a couple of months become a pretendy Sikh or a Jew and wear a Yarmulke/kippah, or a Rasta, your missus wouldn't need a handbag, as everything can fit where the dred's normally go. I've got a nice baseball cap you can have.
or a Jew and wear a Yarmulke/kippah, or a Rasta, your missus wouldn't need a handbag, as everything can fit where the dred's normally go. I've got a nice baseball cap you can have.
just been reading a thread about 2 chimpanzees that were stuck in an horrible zoo in Germany and then were liberated to Wales (??) - prob better off in zoo - put up by kenny mann ... scared me
In these miserable conditions, the intelligent animals could not fulfil their natural urges to exercise and play. They became overweight because visitors fed them popcorn and biscuits and threw sweets at them. Unsurprisingly, they were deeply depressed, constantly plucking out their own body hair – a recognisable sign of mental distress in primates.
I didn't think I was that depressed, just a bit sad now that Christmas is over - and thought that I'd just tidy up my hair - well that's what I thought I was doing!
In these miserable conditions, the intelligent animals could not fulfil their natural urges to exercise and play. They became overweight because visitors fed them popcorn and biscuits and threw sweets at them. Unsurprisingly, they were deeply depressed, constantly plucking out their own body hair – a recognisable sign of mental distress in primates.
I didn't think I was that depressed, just a bit sad now that Christmas is over - and thought that I'd just tidy up my hair - well that's what I thought I was doing!
I've forgotten the cutter guard twice in the past!
I've forgotten the cutter guard twice in the past!
You've obviously got no balls!
You've obviously got no balls!
Pokermonster It's easily done mate.
I didn't think I was that depressed, just a bit sad now that Christmas is over - and thought that I'd just tidy up my hair - well that's what I thought I was doing!
Kinell, I wasn't feeling great when I had my 'mishap' FFS is the unconscious mind avin a larf.
It's easily done mate. I didn't think I was that depressed, just a bit sad now that Christmas is over - and thought that I'd just tidy up my hair - well that's what I thought I was doing!
Kinell, I wasn't feeling great when I had my 'mishap' FFS is the unconscious mind avin a larf.
I have a number one cut all over anyway so it's not a disaster for me, just have to wear a baseball cap for a week. It's amazing how different one looks completely bald, though, even for somebody with really short hair.
Other half cuts mine with clippers, but does it in the bath to avoid hair getting everywhere.
In our early days her mum used to do it for me in the garden to avoid a hairy house - that's not fun in winter!
Too worried about doing it myself that I'll miss a big chunk on the back that she has to do it. Mind you, her most recent effort was fecking shocking. Long ends everywhere. Of course she blames the clippers and claims I need to buy new ones. A bad workman and all that....
In our early days her mum used to do it for me in the garden to avoid a hairy house - that's not fun in winter!
Too worried about doing it myself that I'll miss a big chunk on the back that she has to do it. Mind you, her most recent effort was fecking shocking. Long ends everywhere. Of course she blames the clippers and claims I need to buy new ones. A bad workman and all that....
I'm afraid I too am guilty of the do-it-yourself-job, often with alarming results.
This is usually because I decide to 'have a little trim' with a pair of nail scissors - more often than not when I've had a drink or two.
This often results in me looking like Stan Laurel for several weeks.
This is usually because I decide to 'have a little trim' with a pair of nail scissors - more often than not when I've had a drink or two.
This often results in me looking like Stan Laurel for several weeks.
Just typed out a long message and it disappeared before I could hit the post button. 
I've never had it happen before, TT. The whole reply window just vanished.
It's happened to me several times over the years, PM.
Shame, it was a comical tale about suffering a power-cut midway through clipping my hair.
haha!
I know how you feel though - you don't feel like typing it all out again when you've been 'robbed' of your post.
I know how you feel though - you don't feel like typing it all out again when you've been 'robbed' of your post.
breaking news ...
decided to straighten up the retro punk look in the shower this morning ... good result, now look like that North Korean leader guy but at least it's the same all the way round now.
People giving me a wide berth in the street and funny looks, though.
decided to straighten up the retro punk look in the shower this morning ... good result, now look like that North Korean leader guy but at least it's the same all the way round now.
People giving me a wide berth in the street and funny looks, though.
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