The Fast Show BBC2

scorchio!

I'm a fan

I'll get me coat

Today, oi arr mostly be reading this shoite!

Today, oi arr mostly be reading this shoite!

I'm afraid I was very, very drunk.

theth theth theth theth theth Chris Waddle

Anyone fancy a pint?

somebody sitting there mate.

Always thought the most popular sketch was that “suit you sir” pair.  They were the worst ones on it.

Black, black, black - like the endless blackness of space that leads to the chasm of clams!

As far as TV goes, when I think of the 90s I think of Father Ted and the Fast Show.

"Me, the 13th Duke of Wybourne, in a 6th form girl's dormitory at midnight, with my reputation?"

It was an excellent series and has stood the test of time. The Scousers visiting 'that London' was a goodun amongst many others.

Surely that scousers sketch was from the Harry Enfield Television Show and not The Fast Show.

Swiss Tony:



Snooker is very much like making love to a beautiful woman. You have to lay your balls on the table, grip your extended cue and sink the pink making sure not to miss and get the brown instead



And yet, having therapy is very much like making love to a beautiful woman. You ... get on the couch, string 'em along with some half-lies and evasions, probe some deep dark holes, and then hand over all your money.

Going to the brink of death and back, in a nine car pile-up on a dual carriage-way, is very much like making love to a beautiful woman. First of all, brace yourself, hold on tight - particularly if it's a rear-ender. Pray you make contact with her twin airbags as soon as possible.

I think Billy Bleach, the pub know all would be off the fruit machine and on the bookies FOBTs now.

No, no mate, cover all the even numbers, zero and all the evens under 10, now spin it. Hmmm 27 eh bound to happen I suppose, anyway now you need to cover all numbers over 20 and put a pand on zero.

Swiss Tony was immense - so many people in real-life with more than a touch of Swiiss about their person...

....putting up wallpaper is very much like making love to a beautiful woman : you lay her down, cover her in paste and sticvk it up. then you stand back, light your pipe, and admire your handiwork ...

The 20th anniversary episodes they made last year were very poor. Never go back

Most popular sketch show in the Middle East apparently

grrrrrrrrrrrrreat

Oh bugger.

Billy Bleach was a cracker as was Carl Hooper in "that's amazing"

You ain't seen me - roight?

.billy bleach on fruit machines

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=YZYMnmHgIks

on bbc 2 now

What did I say, Roy?

Ah fi fi fi, ah fi fi, ah fi fi fi, DO WAH DIDDY.

Slipster, Harry Enfield wasn't in the Fast Show

How are you getting on with that piece of skirt you picked up. Are you taking her down under?

There may be better comedy shows, but as a pure sketch show, it's hard to argue that the fast show wasn't the best or at least a close second? Some comedy ages fast but the fast show is still brilliant.

I never though I'd meet any of the characters in real life but there are a few Colin Hunt's on this forum

Brilliant!

the long running thing about Ted the gardner and the titled landowner was something great  .. latent homosexuality and so many social comments ...

what was the n ame of the landowner ?

Ralph ?

Sir

I need to get the fast show box set. More I think about it we could be days here with catchphrases.

Nice :)

Is it just me that thinks that in real life, Money Tree dresses like Dave Angel - Eco Warrior?

THAT is the beauty of the fast show, why is a guy in brown slacks turning and pointing at a camera as mike oldfield plays so funny :)

Hello there, Bob Flemming here.
And today we'll be looking at fishing tackle, Hmm Hmm, excuse me.

I hope you don't mind me asking but i've always wondered, why are you called Swiss Tony? I mean you're not actually Swiss are you?! Is it 'cos, you know, Swiss things are reliable and that.

"Well it's partly that Paul, but it's mostly because i'm built like an Alp and rich like a Toblerone. Yes when a lady's been with Swiss Tony she doesn't forget in a hurry.There's a club in this town Paul called the ****club, I am a privileged member, gold card! I walk up to the door and... Swiss Tony, come right on in! I've even got a backstage pass!"

I had the fast show annual once, it was hilarious.  Remember those two off roaders.  Gripped!  Well they were planning some trip where they were gonna go all the way to Timbuktu by 4WD.  After 1 week they were stuck at the end of their road.  After 2 weeks they were on the hard shoulder of the nearest motorway waiting for the AA.

40 years man and boy. Hardest job in the world.

Isn't it? Wasn't It? Hmmm. Giggsy.....Giggsy-wiggsy...jumpers for goalpoasts....marvellous!

I wouldn't know about that, sir.

No Ted.

I need to check the drainage in the lower field sir.