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Its like Karma paying you back,but the biggest of them all is
THE TRAFFIC LIGHTS ARE ALWAYS RED.
THE TRAFFIC LIGHTS ARE ALWAYS RED.
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You only notice them because you are in a hurry.
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Unless its a women in the bank looking for something in her hand bag ,then you will end up being in a hurry
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you can't find your keys.
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If I'm at home and in a hurry to go out it's not unusual to suddenly need a poo.
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The car won't start no matter how many times you jiggle you8r foot on the accelerator...and the Monster's still coming!!
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The full stop in the question mark is all that is required. No need to put a full stop before it as well. You were clearly not in a hurry.
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Your bus or train are late.
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I used to get the odd decent tip, usually just before the off. One day I took a call about a cert that was due off in about 15 minutes and I was at least that far from a bookies (this is an old story).
I jumped in the car and set off at a fair clip to get on, I wanted £50 at 6/1-ish as I recall. Anyway about 300 yards from the bookies, I'm bombing along and there is a car about 100 yards in front of me indicating to turn right, leaving my run clear. There was nothing coming the other way, so I didn't bother even lifting off. Sure enough a speck appeared on the horizon and the Doris in my lane decided to wait. I dropped anchor, but it was too late and I gave her a decent nudge. I jumped out, immediately apologised, admitted that it was my fault and told her to stay put for five minutes. I ran the rest of the way to the bookies and put every penny I had on me, which was around £130, on the beast as I knew I was going to have to fork out for the damages. Obviously it got nutted on the wire. Desperate day. I tend not hurry too much these days and when I am in hurry and starting to get stressed out, that little voice in my head says "Remember China Castle". |
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This has to be the worst happening by far...
It was the day of my sisters funeral and I had stacks of time to get ready. I knew what I was to wear so didn't check everything before hand. I hadn't worn a suit, shirt and tie for yeras. Got out the shirt and my favourite cuff links but it wouldn't fasten anywhere near at the neck. Now I was in a panic pulling out and trying a dozen shirts that didn't fit! Decided on one that was half an inch too tight so I had to tie a big knot to fill the gap. Got out my most favourite suit and it was Two inches to small at the waist. I'm now in panic free-fall, with shirts and suits thrown every where, so had to decide to just hold things together with a belt, and keep my jacket fastened. So off I go but then realised, when I arrived, that I hadn't taken my hearing aids and specs! So I couldn't read the hymn book, and the funeral woman lent me a pair of off the shelf ones, but they didn't help! The worst thing was that my daughter was to do a reading, but I couldn't hear it! That was probably the most upsetting thing, and I just couldn't say that I couldn't hear.  |
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....* two inches too small
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