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21 Jan 15
11:31
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Date Joined:
24 Jul 06
WHEN ITS RAINING
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Replies: 73
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I BET NOT MANY PEOPLE REALISE THAT
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YOU TRY AND REMEMBER THE LAST WAR FILM YOU EVER SAW WHERE IT WAS RAINING AND YOU SAW ANYONE ON BOARD A SHIP CARRYING AN UMBRELLA
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EVEN THE SAILORS ON THE BISMARK NEVER CARRIED AN UMBRELLA WHEN IT WAS RAINING
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Have you ever seen an ashtray on a motorbike?
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IM SURE THEY WOULD HAVE AT LEAST BEEN ABLE TO USE ONE ,WHEN THEY WASNT ON DUTY ON BOARD THE SHIP
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I DONT GO ON MOTORBIKES ANYMORE EVER SINCE SOME ONE TOLD ME OFF FOR GRIPPING THEIR WAIST TOO TIGHT
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IVE SEEN THEM FISHERMEN ON BOARD DECK WHEN ITS ABSOLUTLY POURING DOWN IN ICELANDIC WATERS,AND NOT ONE OF THEM IS USEING AN UMBRELLA,MY MAM WONT LET ME EVEN GO TO THE LOCAL SHOPS WITHOUT AN UMBRELLA IF THERES THE SIGN OF A CLOUD IN THE SKY
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I KNOW THEM FISHERMEN NEED TO PULL THE NETS UP BUT ALL THEY HAVE TO DO IS ASK ONE OF THEIR FRIENDS TO HOLD IT WHILE THEY PULL IT UP
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I WOULD RATHER LOOK A SISSY THAN GET WET,
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IM NOT BOTHERED WHAT OTHER PEOPLE THINK WHEN I WEAR MY EAR MUFFS IN WINTER,ESPECIALLY THEM THAT LOOK AT ME ODDLY WHEN IM SAT IN THE LIBARY WEARING THEM,ONCE SOMEONE SAID SOMETHING TO ME ,BUT I COULDNT HEAR THEM
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Have you noticed that football managers never use an umbrella?
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THEY DONT BOTHER ME,IF I WANT TO WEAR FLIP FLOPS I WILL,AND ILL WEAR SOCKS WITH THEM IF I WANT
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THEY DO NICK BUT NOT ON BOARD SHIPS
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HARRY REDNAPP DOES MANY A TIME ,HE ONCE WAS TOLD TO TAKE IT DOWN WHEN IT STOPPED RAINING WHEN HE WAS IN THE DRESSING ROOM
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YOU NEVER DO YOU
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YOUR GREEN WITH ENVY
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AND STOP LOOKING AT ME LIKE THAT
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HAVE YOU SEEN THE SHAPE OF YOUR BELLY YOU WANT TO JOIN A GYM AND WORK OUT
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AND I DONT WANT TO WORRY YOU ,BUT YOUR EYES LOOK A FUNNY COLOUR TO ME
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MY EYES NEVER WENT LIKE THAT EVEN WHEN I WENT WITH DIRTY GIRTY
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YOUVE GOT SPOTS ON YOUR BELLY ,YOUVE NOT BEEN TO MAGALUFF WITH THEM DIRTY GIRLS HAVE YOU
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DONT GO HOME TO YOUR MOTHER LOOKING LIKE THAT ,OR SHELL HAVE SOMETHING TO SAY
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AND SEE A CHIROPODIST WITH THEM FEET
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HURRY NOW BEFORE YOU CROAK
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AND STAY OFF THE CRICKETS UNTILL YOU LOOK A LITTLE BETTER
FORGET THE OLD WIFES TALE A CRICKET A DAY KEEPS THE DOCTOR AWAY, DARWIN SAID THEY WILL GIVE YOU DIAREAR |
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Was going to post on here DwD but sent you a PM instead......
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DEAR AUNTY POST,IVE RED YOUR PERSONEL MESSAGE ,AND IV GOT IN TOUCH WITH A A AND THEVE ADVISED ME TO TELL YOU TO RING THEM AND THEY WILL SEND SOMEONE ROUND TO SEE YOU ,BUT IN THE MEANTIME TRY AND DRESS YOUR SELF AND HAVE A WASH
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LET TODAY BE A FRESH START ,NO LONGER WILL THE BOTTLE HAVE TO RULE YOU
YOU RULE THE BOTTLE,AND LETS HOPE THE RED BLOTCHES ON YOUR FACE SOON FADE AWAY ,IF NOT FOR YOU BUT YOUR PARTNERS SAKE AT LEAST |
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NO MORE WILL YOU BE UPSET ,WHEN YOUR PARTNER SAYS GET OVER ONTO YOUR OWN SIDE OF THE BED YOU STINK OF ALCOHOL
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NO MORE WILL YOU HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT GETTING A BAN FOR DRINK DRIVEING ,IF YOU DONT DRINK
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NO MORE WILL YOU HAVE ROWS WHEN YOU WANT TO GO TO THE PUB,BUT IT MUST BE REMEMBERED THERE WILL STILL BE ROWS OVER YOU GOING GAMBLING
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NO MORE HEADACHES WHEN YOU WAKE UP IN THE MORNING ,UNLESS YOUR PARNERS TOLD YOU TO PUT THE WHEELY BINS OUT AND YOUVE FORGOT AND SHES NOTICED
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NO MORE WORRYING ABOUT MONEY FOR DRINK,YOU CAN PUT ALL YOUR ENERGY INTO WORRYING ABOUT MONEY FOR GAMBLING
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YOU MAY SAY WHY HAS DO WAH DIDDY PUT THIS THREAD UP WHEN I PERSONEL MESSAGED HIM ,WELL I SAY BE LIKE ELTON JOHN WHEN HE CAME OUT ,LET THE WHOLE WORLD KNOW AND THEN YOU DONT HAVE TO HAVE WOMEN GROUPIES FOLLOWING YOU WANTING SEX
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IF YOU DECIDE YOU WANT TO GO TO AN A A MEETING DONT WORRY NO ONE WILL LOOK AT YOU AS THOUGH YOUR A DRUNK ,EVEN THOUGH YOU ARE ,THEY WILL COMFORT YOU WITH SEVERAL CUPS OF TEA AND BISCUITS ,IF THE TEA PERSONS TURNED UP ,AND IF ANYONES OTHERED TO BRING SOME BISCUITS
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I WILL HAVE TO GO NOW AS MY PERSONAL MESSAGES ARE BUILDING UP ,THERES LOADS WHO NEED MY HELP ,BUT THEVE ALL STRESSED ME FOR CONFEENTIDALITY,AS YOU DIDNT IM USEING YOU AS A GUINEA PIG,IF IM NOT SUCCESFULL WITH TREATING YOU DONT WORRY THERES LOADS MORE THAT NEED HELP ON HERE AND ILL TRY SOMETHING ELSE WITHNTHEM
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PS WHAT A LOT OF FORMITES DONT REALISE ,IS THAT ALOT OF THE FORMITES THAT HAVE LEFT ARE NOW IN MY CARE SINCE THEY PERSONAL MESSAGED ME ,AND EVEN THOUGH MANY ARE SKINT AND DEVORCED AND HOMELESS THEIR STILL MUCH HAPPIER THAN THEY WERE ,WITH ALL THAT PARRANOYA AND NONSENCE GOING AROUND IN THEIR HEAD
WE HAVE A SAYING IN DO WAH DIDDY LAND THREE CHEERS FOR DO WAH |
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AP....an alcoholic....got to give it up now !
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