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Always
There is always some form of catastrophe or murder on Christmas Day.
Never
No two characters have the same first name.
Even the most despicable of gangsters or angry person never uses foul language.
Nobody ever sits a indoors watching Coronation Street or Eastenders
There is always some form of catastrophe or murder on Christmas Day.
Never
No two characters have the same first name.
Even the most despicable of gangsters or angry person never uses foul language.
Nobody ever sits a indoors watching Coronation Street or Eastenders
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No two characters have the same first name
Exactomundo. No 2 geezers in the same street called John? No thanks, I'll get my fix of reality TV with Bagpuss |
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coronation street set in Manchester, but I have yet to see any city or united fans in the rovers return either pre or post match. also eastenders set in londons east end but I have still to see a group of west ham or millwall fans having a drink on matchday in the queen vic..maybe football fans are just good judges..
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Nobody goes to the toilet except to speak to somebody else
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They both keep the NHS very busy and everybody
gets a job locally. |
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rita puts a t infront of every tother word
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doc cotton goes to visit her long lost cousin in Cornation Street , Manchester
dev goes to visit his long lost cousin in Walford , East London |
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No birds ever boast about being fingered.
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Strangest thing in soapland at the moment is surely the sweet factory in
Emmerdale. |
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Has Walford got more more blacks and asians than whites?
Is there a mosque in Walford? |
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It never happens that good looking girls tell
Tyrone or Chesney that they are UMF s !!! In Corry they go with these ghouls !! |
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Things that always happen - I switch to something else.
Things that never happen - I watch it/them. |
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Does anyone own a washing machine in EE?
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People go to the cafe for breakfast/coffee/sandwich when they only live 5 yards away.
Characters not used for a few weeks and return the colour of mahogany but their partner/spouse is deathly pale. All characters have relatives abroad who need looking after for a few months when actor needs time off. Characters have glistening white teeth. people buy/sell properties and businesses in days. |
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Murder Rates
Coronation Street: 3 per 1000 (16 in 54 years) Eastenders: 11 per 1000 (23 in 29 years) British soaps have a higher murder rate than the world’s homicide capital of San Pedro Sula in north-western Honduras. http://www.manchestereveningnews.co.uk/whats-on/whats-on-news/coronation-street-killings-soap-fewer-7165697 |
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River City is a soap only shown in Scotland, the set has a bus stop
but you never ever see a bus. The show also has a murder rate the equal of the English soaps. |
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If anyone dies,their gravestone is up within a day of the funeral. In real life,you have to wait six months for the ground to settle.
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A friendly card game will end up with someone throwing their car or house keys into the pot (Nap)
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No one ever has a conversation with their friends about operation yew tree and who the next to be arrested might be.
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ALWAYS-EASTENDERS
Whenever an old character walks in the queen vic the music stops,its like they've got the fooking jukebox wired up to the door People go into the cafe and ask whoever is behind the counter if they've seen 'so and so' like its fooking missing persons and while they are there they order a coffee and then leave without it Every 'do' is in the Vic,wedding receptions,wakes,birthdays,christenings,new year,engagement parties,stag/hen nights,first dates,anniversaries YOU LIVE IN LONDON FOR FOOKS SAKE 'Can you look after my stall for five minutes?' Why?u never sell anything All the streets around the square are close knit and tight yet people still get mown down at 50mph NEVER-EASTENDERS-Queen Vic Nobody ever complains about the beer or asks the staff to top up their pint Nobody ever comes back from the toilet and talks about the dump they just had Where do they cook all the meals they serve? |
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Nobody ever sits in silence, soon as we see them its nyap nyap nyap ... things that always happen, when they get drunk it always leads to some big arguement .. they never just strip of and proceed to make babies
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never have ad break in East Enders
always have ad break in Corrie |
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There are always people who enjoy a Big Shout up down the Pub ,in Eastenders ...
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"Characters have glistening white teeth."
Yes, this is something I also noticed in The Village! |
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How are Walford Town doing these days?
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Characters who've been there for years just pack a bag and leave.......usually returning after their attempt to have a career as a proper actor didn't work out.
Half a dozen people live in a two up two down and theres always room for another. Every man is devastated when he finds out his girlfriend has had an abortion. |
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How are Walford Town doing these days?
They're away to Weatherfield County in the next round of the FA Cup |
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Half a dozen people live in a two up two down and theres always room for another.
I haven't watched EE for a while but when I did, they all seemed to take it in turns to live in each of the different houses. Also, I could never keep track of who owned which business |
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Everyone always asks for a pint.
Never heard anyone ask what the guest beer is this week. |
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The pubs are always full every night,
They're shutting down left right and centre in the real eastend, Nobody never moans about the amount of blacks and foreigners in the area. |
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"Phil; we gotta talk."
"Not now. Later." "What's goin' on?" "You're fam'ly." |
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Half the plotlines revolve around somebody keeping a secret from someone and then that person finding out...."Why didn't you tell me" "I didn't want to worry you"...etc.
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How is Ben out of the nick? Not watched this rubbish for ages! Didnt he get done for murder? Also Phil got caught carrying out an armed robbery and got about 6 weeks!
Ian's always fancied Sharon. Must be his turn soon! |
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never seen katy and eva have a lesbian scene in corrie
 , yet we see the gays get it on regurly |
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Only time you ever hear
"The drinks are on the house" is in a soap. No-one ever goes to the toilet. They're poorly written, badly acted sketch shows and unwatchable anyway. |
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No one ever sneezes
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Little Chinese bloke selling dvd's in the pub.
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A few weeks ago , there were about 5 Indian women in saris , sitting in the pub at lunchtime drinking.
I suppose you can find that in every east end pub every lunchtime !!  |
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There's never any dog poo, white or otherwise, on the pavements
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No one ever says, "I wonder what happened to Dave Compton."
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