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mememe
12 Aug 14 20:13
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Date Joined: 21 Jan 11
| Topic/replies: 2,767 | Blogger: mememe's blog
Ok, not told anybody this for 50 years ...
It's the mid sixties, mini skirts, heavy eye make up etc (no, not me). Daughter of shopkeeper a doll about 16/17 helping in shop at weekend.
Me 14, my mum had sent me to buy a loaf.
I go to shop, the doll is serving and asked me what I wanted (no self service in those days) and I was tongue tied and blurted out "a loaf of bread please"
She nearly wets herself laughing and says "nobody says loaf of bread, it's just loaf" and hands me a Mother's Pride.
I pay her and slink out of the shop, red faced.  But at least I left her with a smile on her face.
Please don't tell anybody, I shudder even now.
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Report Burton-Brewers August 12, 2014 8:27 PM BST
before a school basketball match I thought it would be great to give the girlfriend one on the floor of their changing rooms, they were quite new and had under floor heating. I then went to the basketball court where everyone proceeded to laugh and point at me, I had not realised that I certain bodily fluids splattered around my vest and shorts. Good job we always had extra kit. I also got caught fondling a girls jubblies in the needlework room by my French teacher, luckily she was more embarrassed than me and made her excuses.
Report akabula August 12, 2014 9:22 PM BST
I would have thought that coming out as a Burton Albion fan was the more embarrassing.
I went to school to get educated hence the higher intellect to yours BB Laugh
Report Burton-Brewers August 12, 2014 9:42 PM BST
Mr Alkyboozer basketball was an after school activity hence I enjoyed a full education and I did not waste my time standing outside off licenses unlike yourself
Report akabula August 12, 2014 9:51 PM BST
Did you excel at the needlework? Blush
Report Burton-Brewers August 12, 2014 9:52 PM BST
why do you want ya heed stitching?
Report doantwin2easy August 12, 2014 9:55 PM BST
liking that misspent youth Burton.
Report sideshowbob August 12, 2014 9:58 PM BST
i p1ssed on my buckaroo. doesnt get much worse than that.
Report akabula August 12, 2014 10:03 PM BST
@BB Hats off to you m8. A weegie couldn't have put that any better.
Report akabula August 12, 2014 10:09 PM BST
Apart from journeys in my dad's car I only ever travelled by bus.
First time I was in a train station I put my hand out to get the train to stop as you would do for a bus.
I was 17 ffs Blush and was with my new girlfriend.
Report Burton-Brewers August 12, 2014 10:09 PM BST
what's a weegie?
Report SlippyBlue August 12, 2014 10:12 PM BST
I was gawping at the women across the road thruppeny bits on my way to cubs and split my head open bashing into a telegraph pole.Blush
Report Burton-Brewers August 12, 2014 10:13 PM BST
now that is perverted
Report Hank Hill August 12, 2014 10:15 PM BST
Crapped myself at a summer job CryLaugh
Report SlippyBlue August 12, 2014 10:17 PM BST
To be fair B-B, she had a lovely rack. Hope all is good with you. Dad laughed when I told him what had happened when I got carried home in a bloody mess Plain
Report Burton-Brewers August 12, 2014 10:21 PM BST
I know but the cubs you must have been about 7. Things are fine mate, tooth is finally healing and if the wife gets the all clear on Friday we'll be gone next week. Is your mum still battling?
Report akabula August 12, 2014 10:22 PM BST
@BB
a weegie is a 'citizen' of Glasgow.
Are you wanting that stitched the gang member would ask before slashing their victim. Evil bugg3rs the weegies.
Report akabula August 12, 2014 10:23 PM BST
Where you off too BB?
Report Burton-Brewers August 12, 2014 10:26 PM BST
Toulon for about 8 weeks
Report akabula August 12, 2014 10:27 PM BST
Lovely. Has the wife been poorly?
Report Burton-Brewers August 12, 2014 10:29 PM BST
she had a bit of an op about 10 weeks ago but we haven't been able to go until her consultant discharges her, hopefully that will be this Friday
Report SlippyBlue August 12, 2014 10:30 PM BST
Good news about the hampsteads, you were in a bit of distress the other week but at least you still maintained your sense of humour! Am up for another beer next time you are in London. Ma is ok, she has got a wedding to go to in Leeds but has to take oxygen tanks, I spoke to the Hilton and they were undecided if they would allow them in the hotel ffs Angry. I've already booked the room. I can't go as I'm in Newcastle that weekend to see Palace play.
Report akabula August 12, 2014 10:34 PM BST
Good luck with that then BB I hope the wife gets the all clear.
12th August and it's wet, windy and freezing here. Could do with getting away myself.
Report Burton-Brewers August 12, 2014 10:35 PM BST
miserable gits take it to the top slippy and tell them your mum has always enjoyed their hospitality in the past, a bit of sweet talking goes a long way
Report Angel Gabrial August 12, 2014 10:35 PM BST
Has it been a while akabukla? Toulon?
Report SlippyBlue August 12, 2014 10:40 PM BST
I couldn't believe it B-B, I spoke to the duty manager earlier and he couldn't make a decision and said he would ring me tomorrow, just unbelievably bad form from a firm like Hilton. I despair sometimes.
Report Burton-Brewers August 12, 2014 10:41 PM BST
suppose it's bloody health and safety again
Report akabula August 12, 2014 10:42 PM BST
Has what been a while? If getting away then no just sick of the dramatic change in the weather.
Report SlippyBlue August 12, 2014 10:46 PM BST
Yep exactly right B-B, he said he wasn't sure if it would breach health and safety regulations.
Report Back High Lay Low August 13, 2014 10:57 AM BST
On Christmas day when i was seven years old we had about twenty relatives over for lunch and afterwards everyone was sitting around chatting and the conversation got around to religion. I was making a point about the long term ramifications of the reformation when i stated that Martin Luther's Ninety-Five Theses had been written in 1715 when in-fact it was 1517.

Still get red cheeks thinking about it today.
Report Ken Masters August 13, 2014 11:18 AM BST
Should have just launched into his "I have a dream" speech, no-one would have noticed.
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