Chit Chat
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When one thinks of famous beard wearers one instantly thinks of full on nutters like Peter Sutcliffe,Bill Oddie,Rasputin,Brian Blessed and Dave Lee Travis.
After all the years of negative beard publicity,(murderers ,mental illness and Archie Gemmel were never a good selling points imo!) perhaps it's once again time to start trusting these bizzare fringe members of society?
I was on a bus today mixing with the proles and less fortunate in society when a Beardy boarded and you could see the whole bus inwardly shrinking hoping the hairy mess wouldn't sit next to them(he stood in the end!)
So come on Chit Chatters "Think beyond the foilage"..therer's often a sensitive soul lurking beneath the unkempt mess and wild eyes.
After all the years of negative beard publicity,(murderers ,mental illness and Archie Gemmel were never a good selling points imo!) perhaps it's once again time to start trusting these bizzare fringe members of society?
I was on a bus today mixing with the proles and less fortunate in society when a Beardy boarded and you could see the whole bus inwardly shrinking hoping the hairy mess wouldn't sit next to them(he stood in the end!)
So come on Chit Chatters "Think beyond the foilage"..therer's often a sensitive soul lurking beneath the unkempt mess and wild eyes.
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Replies: 58
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Jesus wore a beard
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I'm with BV on this.
Everyone I've ever met with a beard has been 'strange' in some way. I used to work with a bearded misfit. She looked a right mess. |
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a former employer of mine would not set anyone on who had a beard or moustache
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"a former employer of mine would not set anyone on who had a beard or moustache"
Totally understandable on hygiene and health and safety reasons alone |
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They should never, ever be trusted, They'll try and lure you in to a twilight world of ornithology, real ale, ghastly knitwear, Volvo Estates and morris dancing.
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Santa
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ornithology, real ale, ghastly knitwear, Volvo Estates and morris dancing.
A truly sobering thought |
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David Blunkett was a bit of a rogue.Seems the guide dog was just for sniffing out fanny while he was in the cabinet!
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the psychology of having a beard is that 'you', the 'real you' , become hidden. Never trust a bearded person unless theres an absolute stack of cicrcumstancial to suggest you should.
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Goatees.
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A fine point DM...not unlike the presumption that all liberal mp's are homosexuals without absoloute complete and utter proof to the conttary.
Perhaps the bearded should have their CRB checks around their necks for the public to check on before sitting next to them or giving them money for a cup of tea. |
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Men with ponytails should be given a wide berth.
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They won't really spend it on tea or coffee. They'll be all misty eyed, sprawled out in Starbucks with a bottle of Buckfast cunningly hidden in their facial shrubbery.
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[ This image is no longer available. ]
A very recent picture of Michael Foot...NOT to be trusted imo |
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He's clearly an evil wizard. Let's burn him.
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Only one thing worse than the bearded......bearded cyclists.
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Bearded cyclists are the spawn of Satan and maraud in gangs, whisking the vulnerable off to craft fairs.
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Surely Bill Oddie hopes a few tits will nest in his fungus.
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Don't upset The Oddie. Chuck Norris told Oddie he thought that his beard was much better than Oddie's, next thing he knew he was waking up in a hospital, having been roundhoused, flush on the chin. Oddie had simply left a note, explaining that if Norris didn't wish to have to be tube fed for the rest of his life, he should call a press conference from his sick bed and issue a formal apology, which he duly did. Norris wrote in his autobiography that even to this day "The mere mention of Oddie's name in my presence makes a little bit of pee come out."
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Robin Cook.......another famous political fornicator!
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burt
did that rule apply to females only ? |
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Just a bit more background on The Oddie (from wiki)
"He was one of the most dangerous men in Britain. He was the dark lord of the Sixties London gangland scene and, together with his brother Nigel, was as infamous as Ronnie and Reggie Kray and ‘Mad’ Frankie Fraser." ...and to think he now passes himself off as a birdwatcher - absolutely chilling |
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no capt but Liz did get shown the door when she applied
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Admittedly the river runs very deep with the bearded but in their defence the modern day bearded more than often harbour anti establishment qualities, a non conformist stance which perfectly mirrors the feelings between the people and the corrupt establishment.
The modern day bearded should be taken seriously as leaders of men ( in a bearded kind of way). A self muttering bearded man/woman is more likely than not involved in a form of self discovery, were as a self muttering non bearded man/woman is a much more dangerous animal. Jesse Duke is a leader of men. He had a beard. Hitler and Rock Hudson owned a moustache. They are the ones who need to be assessed. |
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Leaders of men?
Such as " Hello. My name is Clive and I'd like to count on your vote in the upcoming election for the presidency of the South West Gloucestershire model railway club." |
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I have a beard and I ride a bike. I don't feel very welcome in this thread :-(
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Don't worry. I'll ask round the Chit Chat females and see if they have a razor you can borrow, and the lads will sort you out with a decent motor.
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Men with ponytails
A pony tail is just a "rear beard". |
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Bearded cyclists are eccentric yet acceptable imo. But bearded cyclists in helmets suggest lives dominated by earnestness and unnatural practices.
If you're on a train and see a bearded cyclist in a helmet approaching, then immediately place your luggage on the adjacent seat. If he's carrying a folding bicycle, move to another carriage. |
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The naked rambler has a beard but unfortunately has no bicycle it seems, but i imagine he would not be a man who would feel the need for a helmet.
Perhaps he should be the poster boy for the bearded. The world would be a duller place without the bearded. |
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You're dabbling in dark forces criticizing beardos
Popular ITV teatime children's show introduced the world ( or at least the under 8s ) to Frederick Edgar Dinenage a man who was a very close friend and, I believe, biographer for the Krays You wouldn't think a man like that would have too much to worry about, and he used to bully Jon Miller and later Gaz Topp ( cutting his hair with a pair of garden shears ) relentlessly Beardy Hargreaves, alleged friend of Oddie, was a different kettle of fish altogether though. Although he had an avuncular appearance and you suspected he spent his time whittling wood and making fishing floats he currently hold the highest Hare Psychopathy Checklist, taking the record from mustachioed menace and scourge of the prison system Charles Bronson. Apparently Charles Manson modelled himself on 'Uncle Jack' (even growing a beard, albeit less luxuriant than the How maestro's) and used to boast about re-enacting Hargreaves famous on air pasting of Mick 'Magpie' Robertson on fellow inmates |
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Beard sporter Anthony Worral Thompson ... Would you tell him you didn't trust him? Even though he was caught helping himself at Tescos... Would you want to be the one that told him???? I'd 4king wouldn't. I'd rathe call Marvin Hagler a nonce. TO HIS FACE!!!!
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It is a little known fact within the film industry that in 2005, following the rather wooden and oh so smug Pierce Brosnan's stint as James Bond, bosses wanted to 'beef up' the lead character. A final short list of 2 men screen tested for the part; Daniel Craig and Richard Stilgoe. Despite far and away out performing Craig in the fight scenes, and doing all his own stunts whilst making amusing anagrams, bosses felt that a bearded Bond wouldn't sit well with the masses. There was also a growing feeling on set that Stilgoe didn't really sit well as a 'James', so the lead characters name was changed to Colin. There was also some concern about Stilgoe ad-libing torture and sex scenes to music. In the end opinion was so split that two separate movies were filmed, one with Craig and one with Stilgoe. The final scenes of Casino Royale, seen by millions of course, show Craig falling in love with a double agent and a climatic finale shot in Venice. The version featuring Stilgoe as Colin Bond ends with Bond enjoying some much deserved R and R, cavorting in some snazzy knitwear on a deserted moor, only to find out that Q is in fact an Al Qaeda sympathiser, and he has hot wired Bond's metal detector, which explodes in to a ball of flames.
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718
Frederick Edgar Dinenage was a bearded abuser of the mulleted Gaz Topps. Is this correct? |
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I would indeed think twice before telling Worral Thompson directly to his beardy face that I didn't trust him.
But as a convicted shoplifter he does rather demonstrate the point of the thread regarding whether we should ever trust a beardy. Hargreaves was, of course, the veteran of many a cider-fuelled rural ruck, and could hold his own with townies like Dinenage no problem. But HOW could we know whether to trust him? The answer was that he was a confirmed pipe-smoker and thus a man of unimpeachable integrity. |
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I was in the dentists waiting room a while back ,when I spotted a woolly jumper wearing beaded freak reading the guardian, luckily someone phoned the police and he was escorted off the premises. He was last seen climbing into a 2cv with a vote labour and save the whale stickers in the back window.
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Those Amish beard cutters in the USA had the right idea.
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Seems Chit Chat has indeed spoken and the bearded can NEVER be trusted.
Who can forget the "Bearded Beast" that is David Bellamy when he paired up with Oddie? there's a reason he's rarely on screen these days(and it's not becuase he's usally to be found in swamps eating beetles and worms) During a Blue Peter wildlife special back in the 70's Bellamy and Oddie were paired up to do a jungle shoot spotting gorillas,oranguats and tigers etc.However after hours in the blazing sun Oddie and Bellamy went berserk when a gorilla wouldn't come out of the bushes..the pair of them literlaly beat a whole "gang" of gorillas to death, sparing nothing in a savage hand to hand beating the jungle had never seen before or since.The blood soaked pair appeared from bush beating their chests and howling asking the other animals if they'd "fancy their fekcing chances" Tigers,elephants and gorillas have NEVER been seen in that area ever again.It took none other than Peter Purvis himself to bring back Bellamy and Oddie..though neither would grace childrens tv again. |
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I imagine the mighty orioles has a beard a la Robert Jay of Leveson fame. Suffice to say, not to be trusted.
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