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lmfao
14 Dec 09 11:02
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Date Joined: 07 Jun 06
| Topic/replies: 6,403 | Blogger: lmfao's blog
First question she asked:
'Have you ever wondered why everything up in the Cosmos is so ordered and peaceful?'

I stared at the old dear for a moment in disbelief ( pun intended).

'Ordered? Peaceful? My Dear- there are forces up there so powerful that they are ripping apart the very fabric of time and space. I'll do you a deal- you go away - read Stephen Hawkin - then come back and i'll listen to you - and then i'll read your scriptures with an open mind.'

'Oh - I don't think I'm allowed to do that - this book sounds subversive'

She looked a little pale so i was tempted to ask whether she should pop along for a blood transfusion- but I held back and just smiled and wished her a nice day.

Wonder if she will return.
Pause • Switch to Standard View Jehovas Witness called a few days back
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Report Back High Lay Low • December 14, 2009 11:12 AM GMT
Stephen Hawking has written some of the most popular coaster's in the history of literature.
Report french force • December 14, 2009 12:03 PM GMT
I just ask them, what Exactly did you see? they never answer.
Report HRH The Lager Khan • December 14, 2009 12:08 PM GMT
I find the animal horns, pagan symbols and the sacrificed virgins, goats and sheep lying all over the front garden helps put them off ringing the bell
Report ENGLANDAWAY • December 14, 2009 12:35 PM GMT
Two witnesses knock a door and are invited into the kitchen.
The owner makes them a brew and then asks "so, what do you want?"
"Dunno" comes the reply "we have never got this far before"!
Report Euro5 • December 14, 2009 4:47 PM GMT
Jehovah's Witness sold me an advent calendar
I opened the first door and there were 2 of the f****** stood behind it
Report Augustine • December 14, 2009 4:54 PM GMT
When I was a kid, my dad used to argue with them for hours when they came round. He'd keep them standing on the doorstep and he'd never concede any of their points.

They stopped coming eventually.
Report orioles • December 14, 2009 4:57 PM GMT
My father was a geologist and would invite them in and discuss fossil history. I'm sure he destroyed some faith along the way; I hope he was right, or someone will be roasting the poor bugger now.
Report wit-ham • December 14, 2009 5:05 PM GMT
my brother answered the door to them when we were kids and shouted to my dad

it's those shampoo people again
Report speedypro • December 14, 2009 5:14 PM GMT
Callum Gilhooley sold them his book, the honda Haynes manual, £4.50
Report Ivor • December 14, 2009 5:14 PM GMT
What is their missionery position when they do come round? Are they expected to recruit a %age to the fold - or is the door-knocking suffice in itself?
Report Make my hay • December 14, 2009 5:30 PM GMT
"Sir, the answer is Jesus. Now what is the question?"
Report Tony Broke • December 14, 2009 5:32 PM GMT
i dont think jw's would say that tbh
Report HH Sultan Vinegar • December 14, 2009 5:35 PM GMT
no they're not very big on Jesus .
It's all about Jehovah and the Watchtower and Tract Bible Society - a multinational printing and property conglomerate who happen to exploit the Jehovahs Witness© brand.
Report Make my hay • December 14, 2009 5:41 PM GMT
I'm going to have to read up on Jehova because I haven't got a clue who the fk he is
Report HowieTheRookie. • December 14, 2009 6:13 PM GMT
Yahweh
Report HH Sultan Vinegar • December 14, 2009 6:17 PM GMT
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R_hlMK7tCks
Report Make my hay • December 14, 2009 6:24 PM GMT
Come on who threw that stone?
LOL, I knew that was going to be that clip
Report Johnnee • December 14, 2009 7:45 PM GMT
2 called on me back in October. I've told them I might untie them and let them out for Christmas
Report unmatched yet again • December 14, 2009 7:58 PM GMT
whats the difference between a jehovas witness and a lada

you can always shut the door on a jehovas witness
Report NEARCTIC • December 14, 2009 10:35 PM GMT
ask them why they all seem to be having four kids each if the world is going to end next week
Report Aunty Post • December 15, 2009 6:47 AM GMT
This still amuses me when I think of it!

A buddy of mine, who is seriously wealthy, was amusing himself cleaning his £250k plus worth of cars.

He had opened the electric gates as a friend was about to arrive.

He didn't see the four JWs untill they approached him.

In the ensuing banter one of them accused him of being very materialistic to which he replied,
"I'm not materialistic, I just like nice things"!

Classic..............
Report The Magic Flea • December 15, 2009 1:16 PM GMT
it is a really bizzare religion. I think they believe that there is limited space in paradise. Why they then try to recruit more people is beyond me.
Report Clerkmore • December 15, 2009 1:30 PM GMT
There was a story told about Jake LaMotta, the famous boxer in the 1940s, who was out for a training run in New York and was stopped by someone who said: "Would you like to be a Jehovah's Witness?"

LaMotta, who apparently wasn't very bright, replied: "I didn't see nuthin!!"
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