Tearing the cartilage in my knee or rupturing my achilles tendon. I thought I wanted to die when the second one happened.

Appendix nearly bursting.

I've yet to experience serious pain.

Most I can offer here is when I had my nose cauterised at 13/14 years old. Felt like a lighter was being held under my nose for about 5 seconds. My eyes started streaming. It was over just before I was about to cry. :D

Three things come to mind...I ruptured my cruciate ligament playing footie, anyway, many months later I ended up having reconstructive surgery. After a couple of days in the hospital a throng of nurses gathered round to remove the drains that had been placed inside my knee. There's not much to it, all they do is attach some pliers to the end of the tube poking out of your knee then pull it out as fast as they can. The reason for more than one nurse is so that after you've felt the pain from the first drain coming out they have to restrain you for the second one.

Whilst on one of my many outpatient visits for follow up checks I complained about an area of swelling on theinside of my leg just below the knee. It turned out to be fluid that had no place to go so they decided to vent it. I'm not one for needles and when I saw the size of the thing lying in the kidney tray on the trolley I knew it was gonna be bad. The doctor told me it was going to hurt. He wasn't wrong. To vent the fluid from the medial area of the knee they go in from the opposite side so as not to rip through your medial ligament...so basically they shove a needle right through the knee from one side to the other tthen suck out the fluid. I clearly remember the doctor telling me there was 'no need for abuse' when I yelled out 'B@stard' as he shoved the needle in. I also bit one of the nurses whose arm was acros my chest holding me down.

A third occasion occurred in a clap clinic in Dundee. I had a rash on my c0ck and I though I had better get it sorted so I made an appointment. The guy gets me to lie down and starts chit chatting about my job and sexual activity and all that. During the course of our conversation, and at a point where I was completely off guard, he jammed an 8 inch cotton bud down my**s eye which felt like I had been skewered to the table. It was in and out as quick as a flash but I kid you not it was extremely unpleasant. To add insult to injury I had to wait a week to see if my kn0b was going to fall off or not. To further terrorise me I was sent home armed with lots of pamphlets to read...one's about the nastiest of infections, some of which can kill you. I finally got summoned and it turned out that I didn't have any kind of std, I actually had an alergic reaction to some of the oils and greases we used at work.

two broken arms and internal bleeding around teh elbow joints, didnt take anything for the pain, nurses nearly fainted when I told them.

Swearbox 12 Nov 14:40
I had a rash on my c0ck [...] I actually had an alergic reaction to some of the oils and greases we used at work.

I think there's more to this story than you're letting on, Swearbox.

How do you break your pelvis?

Smashed into a car that some** was reversing on to a main road back in Jan 03.

"Needed the top man in the country to put it back together."

I'm not quite sure how a rural branch of a retailer of low quality clothing to the poor is going to help you with your pelvis.

I once jumped over a picket fence and my mate pulled my hand away so that I landed right on my side with half my body dangling on either side of the fence.

That didn't hurt much at all but the paper cut I got from my cornflakes box this morning is fecking killing me.

giving birth would surely top all of these , like pushing a melon out lol

kidney stones

Seems I wasn't wrong about my kidney stones. Was only a few weeks ago, I keep getting twinges, like it's starting up again. Thankfully, so far it hasn't. Ultrasound scan for them next week :(

camera down my thingy when they checked my bladder out - absolute agony

myself, dislocated knee cap, broken ribs

worst ive ever seen was a guy whose kneecap shattered on a ruigby field, never seen a groan man scream like that

Having part of bowel removed was painful as was having the drains pulled out. A South African doctor i heard talking to another patient suffering gall stones said the worst 3 pains someone could suffer are;

1. A Neuralgia which is known to cause people to commit suicide to escape the pain.
2. Kidney stones/gall stones
3. Giving birth.

made me feel better, although the other patient wasnt happy.

I've not has renal colic, but I'd like to hear from someone who has had both as I can't imagine worse pain than that caused by gallstones. The pain was beyond excruciating and constant. I've had several 'attacks', though thankfully, none for a couple of years, but the worst one lasted nearly 8 hours with no relief.

I completely snapped my achillies tendon in my left foot. The pain is unimaginable.

Ive broken bones and had teeth drilled when the dentist didnt do the anethesis correctly (and then caught the nerve) but the tendon was by far the worst.

I lost the whole of the 2nd finger on my left hand when it got trapped in a door.

That hurt!

been pretty lucky so far, but most pain was tearing anterior and medial knee ligaments