Poor quality bait.

Lift your game  or head back to the fish-farm, wasting your time in these waters.

Last time I went to the Melbourne Cup was in 1987. I was in one of those celebrity marquees and met a terrific old boiler called Lady Susan Renouf. She said she had been married to some of the richest and most powerful men in the land but she had never got over an encounter she had a year ago with a gentleman she had met at the Melbourne Cup. A private school man of impeccable manners with the LOUDEST BELCH on any human being she had ever met. A prodigious user of alcohol with a most offensive sense of humour who had difficulty in both keeping his hands to himself and his trousers on. I asked what was it about this man that had so changed her life. She said mostly because of the fact that he had given her AIDS!! I was unperturbed by this news. I was preoccupied trying to get a particulary stubborn champagne cork out of a bottle of Moet. She said no man had touched her since that day. She was a bit sad about that because the old girl really LOVED A ROOOT!!

We went back to her place in TOOORACK. I said get undressed bitch 'cause I'm about to fire the ROCKETS TO THE ASSS!!' She said 'but you can't. I've got AIDS.'  By this time I was on my 7th bottle of MOET I didn't give a FCKK ABOUT AIDS. YOU CAN SHOVE YOUR AIDS UP MY ASS FOR ALL I CARE!! Lady Susan was most appreciative of my BONER. She said no one she had ever met had been able to consume SO MUCH ALCOHOL and maintain a perfect erection. No one except for the BAD MAN that gave her AIDS. I said the CNTT was probably on DRUGS. Lady Susan gives a terrific BJ. She can actually suck your dick while drinking a glass of MOET and organise her social engagements for the coming week with her personal secretary all at the same time. At one point she said she had to take an important call and asked if I'd mind if the personal secretary took over on the BJ and I said 'that's fine go right ahead' and I gotta say Nigel did a terrific job in her absence.

Anyway it was a lovely day. I never got AIDS either which was a bonus. Just chlamydia.

my experience much the same as Pittsburgh Phil and we had a runner so do go prepared for a bit of a bun fight to say the least. getting to and from the racecourse not the easiest either if you're not going by train.

Joined: 30 Apr 12 | Topic/replies: 553 | Blogger: PittsburghPhil's blog
As a party, it's grossly overpriced.

As a day at the races it blows goat.

Unless you fork out the extra money (and plenty of it) for reserved seating you'll be watching the races on a screen. Might as well stay home and watch it on T.V. You'll certainly see a lot more. If you're on the lawn you will literally not be able to move. Getting a bet on will be a major logistical exercise. Getting a drink will cost a king's ransom and will be about as hard as getting a bet on.

The only decent viewing spot at Flemington is the Hill Stand and the seats there will cost a fortune. The Members is a terrible place to watch the races from because you're behind plastic, except for the old stand which is much too low to get a decent view, the pylons obscure your view and it's about a furlong short of the winning post so a photo finish is anyone's guess.

Then there's all the corporate areas which are OK if you're a B-list celebrity hoping to see a few A-list celebrities. But if you're interested in the races, forget it.

I've only ever been to one Melbourne Cup ... 1997 ... Might And Power. Even though I finished in front on the day it was probably the most miserable day I've ever spent on a racecourse. Never again.

If you want to see a big race meeting at Flemington the time to go is the autumn. Super Saturday. Australia Cup day. Check it out before it gets too popular and becomes just like Melbourne Cup day.





What a load of crap, been a member at flemington for many years never watched a race threw plastic, have always had a great elevated view about 30m from the line, I think your 2nd last paragraphs 1st sentence is the only one that needs reading

opps ..I mean Pittsburg Pete not early crow who was just quoting the first named