An Open Letter to An Taoiseach

Just got sent this e-mail . .Funny but sadly true

Dear Mr. Kenny

Please find below my suggestion for fixing the Irish economy.

Instead of giving billions of pounds to banks that will squander the

money on lavish parties and unearned bonuses, use the following plan.

You can call it the Patriotic Retirement Plan:

There are about 400 thousand people over 50 in the work force.

Pay them €1 million each severance for early retirement with the

following stipulations:

1) They MUST retire.

400 thousand job openings - unemployment fixed

2) They MUST buy a new car.

400 thousand cars ordered - Car Industry fixed

3) They MUST either buy a house or pay off their mortgage - Housing Crisis fixed

4) They MUST send their kids to school/college/university - Crime rate fixed

5) They MUST buy €100 WORTH of alcohol/tobacco a week .....

And there's your money back in duty/tax etc

It can't get any easier than that!

P.S. If more money is needed, have all members of the Dail pay back

their falsely claimed expenses and second home allowances

If you think this would work, please forward to everyone you know.

Also;

Let's put the pensioners in jail and the criminals in a nursing home.

This way the pensioners would have access to showers, hobbies and walks.

They'd receive unlimited free prescriptions, dental and medical

treatment, wheel chairs etc and they'd receive money instead of paying

it out.

They would have constant video monitoring, so they could be helped

instantly, if they fell, or needed assistance.

Bedding would be washed twice a week, and all clothing would be ironed

and returned to them.

A guard would check on them every 20 minutes and bring their meals and

snacks to their cell.

They would have family visits in a suite built for that purpose.

They would have access to a library, weight room, spiritual

counselling, pool and education.

Simple clothing, shoes, slippers, PJ's and legal aid would be free, on request.

Private, secure rooms for all, with an exercise outdoor yard, with gardens.

Each senior could have a PC a TV radio and daily phone calls.

There would be a board of directors to hear complaints, and the guards

would have a code of conduct that would be strictly adhered to.

The criminals would get cold food, be left all alone and unsupervised...

Lights off at 8pm, and showers once a week.  Live in a tiny room and

pay €600 per week and have no hope of ever getting out.

Think about this (more points of contention):

COWS

Is it just me, or does anyone else find it amazing that during the mad

cow epidemic our government could track a single cow, born in Mayo

almost three years ago, right to the stall where she slept

And, they even tracked her calves to their stalls. But they are unable

to locate 125,000 illegal immigrants wandering around our country.

Maybe we should give each of them a cow.

Also;

Think about this ... If you don't want to forward this for fear of

offending someone -- YOU ARE PART OF THE PROBLEM! It is time for us

grumpy old folk of Ireland to speak up!