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Dear Chancellor of the Exchequer,
Please don't tax us. We love punters really. Signed, the bookies. PS no I can't give you a price, the terminal's over there between the FOBTs. |
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Dear Rachel,
Trying to balance a book is so last century - but if you are determined to try: If you don't tax us, we'd be willing to give you a lend of some of our software that could solve all of your problems. The software will enable you to profile, identify and target a huge number of people that are very susceptible to being fleeced. RSVP to: The Society for the Protection (& Proliferation) of The Wheels & Reels. |
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Safer gambling week.
Woke carp. |
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Betflimpers & Roguebook are both insisting that all addicts
(I mean clients) wear a condom whilst playing the new "Who's The Daddy" slots game. |
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Talking about woke.
Just had a card flier posted through the door inviting me to see Father and MRS CHRISTMAS turn on the village tree lights. wtf is going on in these peoples heads? |
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The new software at RobUblind.com can identify both a safe height and safe heat for optimum gameplay.
Men playing roulette up ladders and women playing slots near a hot stove - will automatically be redirected to safer spinning environments. |
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show your bank statements - wheres your money come from - deposit limits - limit your time - bla bla bla
now heres 10 free spins on the slots something you've never been on or had an interest in but we will try n get you hooked. |
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Get_U_Hooked_On_Slots.com (the ethical Bingo site), they're a "community" not a gambling company don't you know - have installed some new Bingo Callers for the week.
The new calls will include: 10) Number Ten - Deposit again. 80) Eight and Blank - You've done your bank. 34) Ask for more - we're breaking the law. 17) Dancing Queen - sell your spleen. 30) Dirty Gertie - Lost your shirtie. 44) Droopy Draws - we want what's yours. 61) Six and one - You've been well done. On it's own.... - You've lost your home. |