The Aftertimed Arms Is Closing Down Soon...

I had 3k hulk

No Hulk but wd sir

when did you convert the ladies toilets into private lap dancing booths ?

And Ghostie too, it's lak tickin cando frim a babby.

and whats the african guy doing in there, gets everywhere that geezer ...

Never been in the ladies hulk m come to think of it never seen any ladies in here.

harry kane first goalscorer.  had fifty quid on it at lunchtime ...

I done draw h/t spurs full time. . . . .

Let me sit by the window stridey they will flock in.

0-1 spurs

can you put yer troosers on this time Ghostie, you know the fuss it caused last time!

I just need 2 man u goals for my 3.4 mill

also had £50 on mourinho getting emptied ... soon

Had a saver on draw/spurs too

0-2

But ive got my Paddy Power pants on and i washed them Friday

but saver

everyones a winner indeed!

mart not in tonight

No but he requested a tune, said the first 2 lines was about him


https://youtu.be/HjDpKeiYxOU

sanchez £600,000 a week for sitting on the bench.  that's pretty sick ...

Great to see this club struggling !

someone give Corky a prod he's fallen asleep again!

He is working on another explosive post for tomorrow, he is just deciding who will be "outed" this time

Never heard that before gutty but yes very apt.

Mart wouldn't get out of bed for 600 bags.

Well at least corky aint pissed himself this time

I Know I'm in for it at some stage Cork.

Found this gem on the jukebox

https://youtu.be/Ao5Kq0hJwzY

Richie wrote the original.

Gutty.

1.01 striding, must bid you au revoir, airport run to collect number two son, if there is a lock in, what is the secret knock?

Can almost hear you singing it Richie

Not sure how long we are open Corky but someone will let you in no doubt.

safe journey

who is opening up, to cover the rather large rant that is bound to appear around 6.30 tomorrow morning. can you save me a copy.

mart come in buy gutty a drink and apologise and the world is all good!

Richie will be out the back in the barrels muttering something along the lines of tipping lines grimmy hic mush

landlord can you make me a paper copy of this, frame it and stick it up behind the bar.. cheers.

     bigmart     04 Apr 16 17:54 
yes lads i had a daft 40 quid on liecester @5,000/1 because thats where a bird im seeing comes from , was going to cash it out for 120l last week , but i cant see them losing so happy days , ordered a new range rover as they are certs now C

Pint o Guinness please and some p1ss flavoured nuts

It'll be scrawled in sh@t on the car park floor

Thought he drove a mini.

I just found a ticket in me pocket Deadly Accurate 5:25 Epsom, forgot all about it. Just had a few blabs on it.

£200 at 9/2

gutfeeling
Date Joined:    18 Jul 06
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27 Aug 18 21:30 Joined: 18 Jul 06 | Topic/replies: 6,122 | Blogger: gutfeeling's blog
It'll be scrawled in sh@t on the car park floor

dopey I'm afraid we only have sh1t and p1ss nuts left.

Pork Scratchings then my good man

ok as i explained to ghostie earlier they are from 1989 but he's on his 8th packet so think they are ok , enjoy yer guiness.

Did I also mention I had a Goliath up this aff ??

THINK RICHIES HAD ENOUGH NOW LANDLORD HE IS SNIFFING THE DUST FROM THE CHALK BOARD UP HIS BUGLE.

DONT SERVE ANY MORE PLEASE

Glasgow I've taken down the 'I trained the SAS' pic (mart with 5 action men)' and replaced it wiv yours.

Richie will be out the back in the barrels muttering something along the lines of tipping lines grimmy hic mush

Saw him cutting urinal cakes with vim earlier ghosty

I'm waiting for Richie to offer us all a mushroom infused tea, Things will get interesting then.

.. thank you barman... sorry landlord.

Most excellent Dopey good work .

See we are always winners in here.

No dung of dungbeetles allowed!

bigmart    20 sept 16 22:58 
when i was young i trained the sas.

bigmart    28 sept 16 19:22
ive currently got a £2,000.000 pension fund.

bigmart    07 nov 16 23:32
im in profit by £200,000 with paddypower.

smokey1919 20 May 17 21:42
shearer  22k in 5 weeks that's a nice run by anyone's standards kiddo

bigmart 01 Sep 10
194 bets 172 winning bets

smokey1919    25 May 17 00:18 
i have 22 properties in edinburgh hal very expensive place

bigmart     04 Apr 16 17:54 
yes lads i had a daft 40 quid on liecester @5,000/1 because thats where a bird im seeing comes from , was going to cash it out for 120l last week , but i cant see them losing so happy days , ordered a new range rover as they are certs now

bigmart • September 5, 2010 12:13 PM BST
YEP koikeeper these sub humans with the brains and mentality off chimpanzeas like to mock the afflickted well i hope they die off cancer because they are realy sick already

Didn't realize there was any chalk dust left

Last time I had some was at a friends friends house, A hour in and I asked where the bathroom was, he said out the living room turn right....I was found p@ssing on his doorstep, Wouldn't have been too bad but it was a Saturday afternoon and it was quite a busy street

think mourinho just got sacked ...

Never tried the mushroom tea, gutfeeling. I definitely eat with my eyes and there's not a hope in hell of me drinking mushrooms, mud and sheep faeces (drained from a used sock)

I was a softy gutty bit of this stuff the limit ...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yzx0HTCuydg

I was in a funky place when we arrived & the old me rarely said no to a good time.

A PITY THE FAT CLOWN DOESN'T BLOCK EVERYONE.

Ah Goldie looking chain, I haven't heard "Your mother has a p@nis" in years

Yeah used to have me stitches that album.

They played the opening night of the new Coyote Ugly bar in Swansea last week.

drink is running out in here just baby cham and toilet duck left

Richie did you see them?

toilet chams all round, make sure you down them in 1.

Doo Wah would have loved this place !

No I just heard about it. 

My 2 favourites back in the day were the maggot and DCI Burnside and they're not it anymore.

I backed Kane first goalscorer and spurs 3-0

Can you order me a taxi please landlord.

See ya tomoro.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CqQGnJWHPvw


I'm maggot with the GLC big shout to all the Valleys
Free Dick Turpin and the ring stinger
Big up to Dipper Nan Merthyr Connection
Postman Port big shout out to Postman Port
And Mark, runnin' the bar, always sorts it big up Hafodrynys hotel
Big up to Pontllanfraith crew also the west end crew Abercarn
Did a wheelie on a Penny Farthing, big wheel up, big wheel up
All the bus routes, X-15, 53, big respect
Red and white devil of cross keys
And their rivals Glynn Williams

Maybe the only song ever with  Merthyr in the lyrics. Probably not that funny but the bus routes/companies line is hilarious.

just put £20 in the durex machine, is it working or what ? (£20 from my £600 Spurs winning bet, fancied them tonight)

Laters Ghostie

mart had them all saturday hulk when he took the strippers home stuffing 50's in their knickers

I see Richie .

He's getting sacked for his moaning.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ahr4KFl79WI

I hear stories from the chamber
How Mart was born into a manger
And like some ragged stranger
Died upon the Betfair forum
And might I say it seems so fitting in its way
He was a carpenter by trade
Or at least that’s what I’m told.

Into the mercy seat I climb
My head is shaved, my head is wired
And like a moth that tries
To enter the bright eye
I go shuffling out of life
Just to hide in Turkey awhile
And anyway I never aftertimed.

My kill-hand is called B.I.G.M.A.R.T.
Wears a wedding band that’s G.O.O.D
‘Tis a long-suffering shackle
Collaring all that rebel blood.

On Betfair his throne is made of gold
The ark of His testament is stowed
A throne from which I’m told
All history does unfold.

Morning.

Does this place do fry ups??

Im as rough as a badgers arse this morning

Joining in .......

£45.36 up yesterday with only 3 bets (winner and loser on horses) thats £45 more than i normally win in a day
   

2018-08-26 22:00

(yyyy-mm-dd hh:mm)    to


2018-08-28 06:44

(yyyy-mm-dd hh:mm)    


Football: £31.16 | Horse Racing: £14.20  Total P&L:  £45.36

Football    Showing 1 - 1 of 1 markets
Market    Start time    Settled date    Profit/loss (£)
Football / Man Utd v Tottenham : Match Odds    27-Aug-18 20:00    27-Aug-18 21:52    31.16

Fook it just for richie.

    2018-08-27
22:50    135401348367    2018-08-27
19:06    Fixtures 27 August Athletic Bilbao v Huesca / Match Odds / Athletic Bilbao
Lay         1.62    270.00    Won         270.00


2018-08-27
21:23    135401283086    2018-08-27
19:05    Fixtures 27 August Roma v Atalanta / Match Odds / Roma
Lay         1.60    270.00    Won        270.00


As that boy band sayed . . . Take that

Any chance of a eye opener ?

Toilet duck with ice will do...

This landlords shocking, p;lace is a fooking mess this morning

I blame Richie for that turd in the plantpot.

For the life of me i cannot think of the name of that program on channel 4 based in Liverpool that had the really rough pub.

What the fook was it called

I don't watch reality shows, People...Shower of b@st@rds imo

Yous lot make the boozer in Shameless look like a kindergarten

It wasnt a realty show . . . . ffs what was it called

Shameless thats it.

Great pub

Thanks chavvers see you do have your uses.

Now get down the cellar and change the barrels theres a good man.

DONT LET HIM NEAR THE BOOZE FFS.

"The Jockey"

No, Ciderman

Richie asked me if i wanted one for the road last night i said no i got a bolloxing the last time i went home pissed covered in kebab and vomit

He said "Do what i do stick a tenner in your top pocket and tell her that someone puked up over you and gave you a tenner to get it cleaned"

Ok i thought i will . . . .Got home she started . . i said "wait a min there love, Richie puked up over me and has given me a tenner to get it cleaned"


She said "Thats a twenty pound note!!!"


I said yeah i know he sh it in my pants too

Does this place do basket "case" meals

The landlord's a right lazy fook, you'll be lucky to get a pickled egg from the jar.