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Same old stuff churned out day after day on British racecourses by commentators & pundits.
Jumped from fence to fence.
Feels the warmth of the whip.
Enjoying himself out in front.
Jumped from fence to fence.
Feels the warmth of the whip.
Enjoying himself out in front.
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We've done this before but here's my annoying cliches these "pundits" and commentators use as a crutch in case they might have an original thought or put their foot in it.
responding for pressure shadow of the post getting the fractions right (they never get them wrong) for starters ! |
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Lost nothing in defeat. Not much use if you've backed the said nag is it?
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'Got first run' but of course its never used when the horse
that gets first run doesn't win. |
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This could be a very long thread. The British media coverage of this sport is built on a solid bed of cliche.
A personal 'favourite' is to hear of how a jockey 'gave the horse a peach of a ride' . There is seemingly no other way to describe it. |
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it's a game of two halves.
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A fav of AOB usually to Rishi
"We've always thought a lot of him at home" |
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M Johnston horses have more energy when headed than Mr Motivator has after munching through ten packets of fruit pastilles.
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how about 'Done My Bo**ocks'
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blasting away,
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up in the van
box seat given the office  |
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The best horse won anyway.
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Horse racing myths
The so called bounce factor, biggest load of old codswallop ever. Horse never recovered from its hard race at the Cheltenham festival, yet a handicap chaser can win 3 times in a month in the mud around Towcester probably the most testing track in the country yet a horse who runs nine months after Cheltenham is still feeling the effects, what utter bollix. |
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Most annoying cliche is Simon Holt's"nothing if not game"
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By far the worst ever kicked to death by Loughran, Pershad and Parrott.
"...fascinating race, this" |
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'Oi luv this haarse'. Copyright - Mick Fitzgerald.
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Another myth the horse needed the run,
yet nearly every guineas winner hadn't run for the best part of 7 months and go straight to the race and win doing handsprings. You can get a horse race fit at home no horse should ever need a run apart from a 2yo who's learning. Rock of Gibraltor didn't bounce did he? |
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win doing housesprings
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You could throw a blanket over the first 6/7 etc
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Loves to get his toe in. I've never seen a horse with toes.
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jumps for fun!!!!!!!!!!!
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"connections will be pleased with that"
beat in a photo...............odds/on |
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game as a pebble
never understood that one |
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It improved 120 lengths because of the blinkers.
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the other horse wanted it more,
as if any horse likes getting whipped to a pulp?. |
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The comment I hear most frequently on ATR and RUK:
The favourite never picked up. Never picked what remains a mystery to me. |
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^picked up
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that win should boost his confidence!
as if the dumb horse knows its after winning a horse race? |
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One of Sir Bob's favourites:
"He loves it round here". Has the horse told you that Bob? |
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scraping paint.
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stays longer than t'mother in law.
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The winning owner has just picked up £100,000 and says.." I'm really pleased for the horse "
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he knows where the winning post is?,
err its a dumb horse we're talking about, the horse hasn't got a goddamn clue about a winning post only stops running when the jockey pulls it up. |
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oncourse racing interviewers "pre-programmed" to always ask the winning connections of the best two mile hurdler ever seen in living memory......"will he get further ?"......"will he jump a fence?"
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catching pigeons on the gallops.Why would any horse want to catch a pigeon
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He's crying out for a step up in trip.
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"Rattling home"
"We're going for some black type" Or............thiongs you never hear "Ridden out all the way to the line"  |
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Things even ^
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'this one will take a world of beating' - wtf?
'won doing handstands/cartwheels' - still to see a horse win doing a handstand/cartwheel  'stays longer than the mother-in-law' - leaves me seething when I hear that cliche. 'the lucky last, say no more, well done big fella, he could go round again' - just some of Tommo's faves, a man who is a walking, talking book of racing cliches |
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Here are some of my favourites:
The horse has a tail The jockey likes the colours he's/she's wearing Thank goodness the rail is not made from foam |