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19 Oct 10 22:38
Date Joined: 14 Sep 10
| Topic/replies: 15,035 | Blogger: revedesivola's blog
Can anyone help me here, im trying to extend my vocabulary. one that comes to mind is.... he wouldnt beat eggs in a cement mixer. any more?
Pause Switch to Standard View FUNNY HORSERACING SAYINGS
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Report Rowley Mile October 19, 2010 10:50 PM BST
wouldn't train ivy to grow up a wall
Report Orchardist October 19, 2010 10:51 PM BST
only stay a mile in a horsebox / stays longer than the mother-in-law
Report Gerry Gallbladder October 19, 2010 10:51 PM BST
Always trying
Report revedesivola October 19, 2010 10:56 PM BST
im liking em Laugh
Report Mooono October 19, 2010 11:02 PM BST
He started to come off the bridle in parade ring..Just listen out for Terry Norman on Timeform Radio some of his quotes are priceless..
Report brigust1 October 19, 2010 11:05 PM BST
fell into a hole.
Jumped like a stag.
Pulled like a train.
Hung like a barge?
Report Gerry Gallbladder October 19, 2010 11:06 PM BST
Ran in snatches
Report revedesivola October 19, 2010 11:10 PM BST
am likin it moono haaaaaahhhhGrinGrin
Report subaru October 19, 2010 11:16 PM BST
'Clare, why dont you explain to the viewers what 'in season' means'

Willie, Royal Ascut, priceless!
Report doantwin2easy October 19, 2010 11:16 PM BST
came there pulling a cart
if he comes back to his best he'd pick em up and carry em
hanging like a gate
hung like a horse
Report revedesivola October 19, 2010 11:20 PM BST
Report Xerophyte October 19, 2010 11:25 PM BST
X and Y locking horns.
Report Orchardist October 19, 2010 11:33 PM BST
travelling like a travelly thing
Report fawwon October 19, 2010 11:38 PM BST
Squirted up the backside
Report crags October 19, 2010 11:57 PM BST
Always in the van
Report crags October 19, 2010 11:58 PM BST
It jumped from fence to fence.. er, that's what a horse in a chase has to do [smiley:crazy]
Report crags October 20, 2010 12:00 AM BST
And from the old boy on sportslive radio.. It's got a longer lead than a hoover.
Report Gracie October 20, 2010 12:06 AM BST
In the box seat... WTF??!
Report Gracie October 20, 2010 12:08 AM BST
When a horse wins from start to finish - led them all a merry dance!
Report revedesivola October 20, 2010 12:12 AM BST
hoover one is great.Laugh
Report BlindProbe October 20, 2010 12:20 AM BST
There;s an Iriah radio commentator that covers GAA(gaelic football and hurling). He commentated for RTE radio for about 60 years, only retired in september. His name is Mícheál O'Muircheartaigh and he came out with some crackers.

    * The stopwatch has stopped. It's up to God and the referee now. The referee is Pat Horan. God is God.

    * "1-5 to 0-8...well from Lapland to the Antarctic, that's level scores in any man's language".
    * "Pat Fox has it on his hurl and is motoring well now ... but here comes Joe Rabbitte hot on his tail ...... I've seen it all now, a Rabbitte chasing a Fox around Croke Park!"

    * "Some players are consistent and some players are brilliant. Colm McAlarney is consistently brilliant. "

    * "He grabs the sliotar, he's on the 50......he's on the 40......he's on the 30....... he's on the ground."

    * "Seán Óg Ó hAilpín.... his father's from Fermanagh, his mother's from Fiji, neither one of them a hurling stronghold."

    * "Teddy McCarthy to John McCarthy, no relation, John McCarthy back to Teddy McCarthy, still no relation."

    * "Colin Corkery on the 45 lets go with the right boot. It's over the bar. This man shouldn't be playing football. He's made an almost Lazarus-like recovery from a heart condition. Lazarus was a great man but he couldn't kick points like Colin Corkery."

    * "In the first half they played with the wind. In the second half they played with the ball."

    * "Setanta Ó hAilpín....the original Setanta from the old Gaelic stories was ten foot tall, had ten fingers on each hand and ten toes on each foot but even he couldn't be playing better hurling than his namesake here today."

    * "... and Brian Dooher is down injured. And while he is, I'll tell ye a little story. I was in Times Square in New York last week, and I was missing the Championship back home. So I approached a newsstand and I said 'I suppose you wouldn't have the Kerryman would you?' To which the Egyptian man behind the counter replied 'do you want the North Kerry edition or the South Kerry edition?'. He had both, so I bought both. And Dooher is back on his feet..."

    * "Anthony Lynch, the Cork corner-back, would be the last person to let you down - his people are undertakers"

    * "Teddy looks at the ball, the ball looks at Teddy."

    * " Dublin have scored two points, one from the hand and one from the land."

    * "Pat Fox out to the forty and grabs the sliothar. I bought a dog from his father last week. Fox turns and sprints for goal. The dog ran a great race last Tuesday in Limerick. Fox to the 21 fires a shot, it goes to the left and wide… And the dog lost as well."

    * "I saw a few Sligo people at Mass in Gardiner Street this morning and the omens seem to be good for them, the priest was wearing the same colours as the Sligo jersey! 40 yards out on the Hogan Stand side of the field Ciarán Whelan goes on a rampage, it's a goal. So much for religion."

    * "There's a streaker now on the pitch, I'd say he's a Kilkenny fan because he looks happy with the situation"
Report revedesivola October 20, 2010 12:29 AM BST
michael was a true genius and i will always associate the gaa with him. evrything he said was worth listening to. a comic at times too
Report ilikewavingatbuses October 20, 2010 12:35 AM BST
'i only ever knew 3 certainties and 2 of them got beat'Laugh
Report revedesivola October 20, 2010 12:38 AM BST
Report crags October 20, 2010 12:54 AM BST
Talking of funny, I expect most have seen this but for those who may not have...
Report ilikewavingatbuses October 20, 2010 1:20 AM BST
not bad crags but ill raise u this

Report revedesivola October 20, 2010 1:44 AM BST
Report revedesivola October 20, 2010 2:14 PM BST
wuldnt train a dog to bark
Report saddo October 20, 2010 2:45 PM BST
FRANK, YOU W@NKER, always makes me chuckle.
Report Tiger Tiger January 15, 2020 4:53 PM GMT

Proper thread.
Report punchestown January 15, 2020 5:05 PM GMT
Ears pricked,loads left in the tank.
Report Callisto-moon January 15, 2020 5:06 PM GMT
mt bets equals full account
Report handtorofe January 15, 2020 5:07 PM GMT
Catching pigeons at home.
Will win half the track.
Only has to turn up.
Has a ton in hand.
These sayings should all be taken with a pinch of saltLaugh
Report longbridge January 15, 2020 5:58 PM GMT
Not so much funny but the odd language that is used in racing commentaries

first-time blinkers or whatever "worked the oracle"

the horse "lost no caste in defeat"

"A weak race in which few landed a serious blow" as if it were a combat sport
Report mymumsfinethankyou January 15, 2020 6:00 PM GMT
full compliment   CryCryCryCry
Report brassneck January 15, 2020 6:23 PM GMT
"but the jockey called a cab at that fence after giving him an armchair ride up to then"Crazy
Report flushgordon1 January 15, 2020 6:37 PM GMT
I'll give it a reet good kick in the tits at the two pole.
Royston on how he was going to ride in a 5f race at Hamilton.
Report TheFerrett January 16, 2020 7:52 AM GMT
Wearing more contraptions than Freddie Kruger
Report brassneck January 16, 2020 5:57 PM GMT
The favourite got stuck in behind a WALL OF HORSES with nowhere to go.Shocked="stupid horse"Laugh
Report flushgordon1 January 16, 2020 6:05 PM GMT
It blew up.
Report ItsMeSwaddle January 16, 2020 9:18 PM GMT


Report Northofperth January 17, 2020 11:19 AM GMT
Some great reading in this thread . Especially the GAA stuff . Keep up the good work .
Report Dr Crippen January 17, 2020 11:40 AM GMT
One from Thommo.

''They're into the straight in line for home. Now which one's going to win?''

And a voice was heard - ''the one that passes the post first you f'in clown.''
Report kavvie January 17, 2020 11:45 AM GMT
he only has to go down to the start and be steered back
Report dambuster January 17, 2020 11:51 AM GMT
The shrewdies were on early at big prices  this morning....LaughLaughLaughLaughLaughLaughLaughLaugh
Report Alices January 17, 2020 11:59 AM GMT
He,s pulling harder than a teenager watching an episode of Hollyoaks.
Report mwnn January 17, 2020 12:11 PM GMT
Hit a bigger flat spot than Holland.
Report happysandwich January 17, 2020 12:22 PM GMT
There's one fallen there - we'll pick it up in a moment
Report unbiased January 17, 2020 1:38 PM GMT
TV pundits,especially Luke Harvey,referring to a trainer.
   "He knows the time of day"!!!
Must be wearing a watch.
"Can ready one first time"
Yes,that is why they were given a licence to train
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