Things you didn't know about an apocalypse

Do Muslims use toilet paper?

We had a bloke on here once who said we're a dirty lot in the West for using toilet paper, when his lot go to a lot more trouble  to clean themselves after moving their bowels.

I wonder what they do?

They wash

Do Muslims use toilet paper?

I think they could make a rather nice looking turban out of toilet paper.

They wash

How do they manage that in a public convenience?

Whole wheat pasta has more fibre and would require more toilet roll, basic science. These panic buyers are shrewd people.
Come the end times, they're not going to be walking around with a sh1tty arse crack, that's for sure.
For a start all our clothes fall off and you get lifted up into space.
You don't want to appear before your maker for final judgment with an inquisitive bluebottle making a bee line (it's ok, they are qualified, they have a cross species flight training certification) for your skiddy cornhole.

Was in supermarket last night met an old mate who said glad to see you aint stocked up with bog roll.
told him more concerned having plenty of stuff going in toilet paper least of yer worries if theres no snap avaialble.
anyway good old fashioned newspaper that me mam used to cut up and thread thro a string to hang in the outside loo and a gazunder for middle of the night. Happy days.

Scrappin` in Nottinghaaam for loo roll

good old fashioned newspaper that me mam used to cut up and thread thro a string to hang in the outside loo

They still do that in Bilston.

Makings new friends would be difficult in an apocalisp

wot do you know about Bilston  Dr ?

if i daint see you in the wick
i'll see yaou in the candle