Boiling The Kettle

Kettle boiled, I’ll go and make myself a brew .........

When I got out of bed this morning my wife shouted "I'll be getting up myself soon" of which I immediately thought oo err. Also the 'I'll put the kettle on' always comes back with the remark 'are you sure it fits you?'

The pepperpots swivel round to look at the TV set in the corner of the room.

First Pepperpot:    What's that on the television then?
Second Pepperpot:    Looks like a penguin.
On the TV set there is indeed a penguin. It sits contentedly looking at them in a stuffed sort of way. There is nothing on the screen.
First Pepperpot:    No, no, no, I didn't mean what's on the television set, I meant what programme.
Second Pepperpot:    Oh.

://www.ibras.dk/montypython/episode22.htm

Catch the bus.
Someone throws a bus at you, the last think you want to do is try and catch it.

Huge financial and environmental blunder by anyone who overfills or overboils their kettle.

I think overboil is the wrong word - I mean stop when it's like 70% of the way there.

Come on Richie, in these dangerous days of pandemic viruses, 100 degrees is essential

planet > people imo

Good one with the bus, can also throw in colds and fish for unlikely items to have been caught.
That said, I know someone who was hit by a flying fish whilst out at sea sailing, if they had been a bit sharper, they could have literally caught a fish.

Angling also unethical.

He was sailing, not angling

I don't see how anyone can pull a fish out of water with a hook in it's mouth without feeling bad about it. I'll add the caveat that people who need to do this to stay alive is fine.

Fish enjoy being caught and hooked in the mouth.

In fact they come back for more.
Catch one and throw it back, and it immediately takes you bait again.

This is quite common.

Lighting the fire....

Why would you do that, when it's already lit?

Turn on the telly.
You are the most beautiful television in the world, with your ample 50 inch screen and slender chrome legs, but for the moment I just want to watch the football.

"i'm going to jump in the shower"

Strange thing to do but each to their own.........

“Nip out to the shops”