Excuses you have used to leave work early

Bloke I worked with was late one day, his excuse was someone had stolen his front door and he had to wait for the carpenter to fit a new one.

My Aunt was an assistant bank manager, one day she turned up a couple of hours late nursing a Mother of a hangover. The manager asked her why was she late and she, diva style just said, "I don't want to talk about it" and went on her merry way. Nothing more was said, I thought that was quite cool!

Defective junction box, New Malden, for me.

Working from home.

I have a doctor's appointment was the simplest and best.

This was a good one:

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http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-bradford-west-yorkshire-12169711

Feb 24, 2017 -- 11:04AM, i_agree_with_nick wrote:

Defective junction box, New Malden, for me.

Not necessarily leaving early but used to work with a guy who phoned in saying he would be late as some kids have broken the BT junction box near his house. He would then come into work when BT had phoned/contacted him to say it was OK. Needless to say, he never arrived at work...!!!

Defective junction box, New Malden, for me.

i.a.w.n. The youngsters on here will not get that at all!

Feb 24, 2017 -- 12:44PM, SlippyBlue wrote:

Defective junction box, New Malden, for me.i.a.w.n. The youngsters on here will not get that at all!

I didn't get where I am today by not getting things at all...!!!

One of the things I hated most about employment was that the most valid reason of all for leaving work early - "I've finished all the jobs I have to do" - was completely unacceptable.

"I've got a migraine, so I'm going home early" on the other hand ... do that often enough and you're guaranteed promotion. After all, you're clearly not going to be any use in the post for which you're employed, so promotion out of it is the obvious solution.

When I was doing my AS Levels (the year before A Levels) I was stuck in a politics lecture from 11-2 on the first day of the Cheltenham Festival.

I had an exam the following week so my mum forced me to attend. I couldn't hold a thought in my head as I was stuck in the classroom. I debated feigning some sort of epileptic fit (despite not having epilepsy). I was in a state of utter desperation knowing that the only chance of me getting home (the town my High School was in didn't have a bookies) was to get the 12:30 bus which would get me home for 1pm.

As soon as the teacher had his back turned I jumped out of my seat and ran like Usain Bolt out of the classroom. I couldn't stop - it was quite exhilarating actually - I felt like a criminal on the run.

I arrived into the bus stop and waved down my bus just as it was leaving. Thank Christ I caught it because I'd have had some explaining to do to the politics teacher if I wondered back in the same day.

Got home just as the tapes were going up for the Supreme Novices. Failed the exam and dropped politics a week later.

a few of us were in a meeting with the boss

fellow worker came in 45 mins late

boss - why are you late?
worker -  waiting for a urgent letter postman
boss - did u get the letter ok
worker - yes thx
boss - you do realise postman are on strike
everyone in room looks at fellow worker
worker - looks down ,keeps head down next 20 minutes

Very good echobelly

Mr E, Mum and Dad always took us 6 kids to Epsom for Derby Day when it was on a Wednesday to have a picnic on the Downs. Next day my form teacher never even asked me for an absence note as he knew full well where I was, he'd just say "Did you back the winner?"

Fantastic scenes mate.

I became obsessed with cricket when I was at primary school and would regularly develop 'sickness' as soon as the summer Test Matches began. My head teacher, god rest his soul, knew I was at home watching the cricket but he never questioned me on it.

Owzat?

I told my boss last Friday that i was finishing early as Colin's Sister was running in the 240 at Sandown and I need to visit a few betting shops.

I once gave the excuse that I slipped on the icy pavement and as I fell the box of matches in my back pocket ignited and burnt a hole in my trousers...obviously had to return home for another pair of trousers.

oops..being late.

i once tried to leave Biology class by saying I had a chess tournament to go to in Glasgow.
The teacher didn't believe me as I was leaving the class. That class was utter boredom I think she broke me with the boring drone.
She made me sit. while she fetched the head of the house? form?
I started to panic slightly and made up a back story about the tournament?
It was in the central hotel in Glasgow, it was various school clubs etc.
when the head man showed up eventually? I said he'd made me late and as it was a timer game I'd probably forfeited the game and they spoiled the tournament for me. The head teacher offered to drive me into Glasgow? and I kept accelerating the importance of the timing clock. eventually they both apologized and said in the future to bring in a letter? I sat back down in the biology class for the last five minutes of the lesson.
learnt my lesson with that one.

In my last job, I had decided that I hated work and wanted to pack it all in. I particularly hated that job - the boss was clueless and wanted a quick job doing rather than a good job, which p1ssed me off totally (the job was testing computer systems so doing a bad job is a total false economy as you will get it back in a few months to correct things).

Anyway, one Friday, after a particularly bad week, I finally had enough about 11 o'clock, so I stood up and told the boss that I had to go to an appointment that I could not miss, and apologised for not telling her earlier as I had 'forgot'. Then I just walked out.

Strangely, a few weeks later she told me they had run out of money so had to let me go. Never been so happy at getting the bullet!

Genuinely I can only remember one occasion....

It was late afternoon, and I had to service a call in Newcastle (160 mile round trip).

Just finishing a meeting and I just sloped off and sat in a corner.

One of the girls saw me and I told her I thought it was a panic attack.

Short of breath and tight chest.

Next I seemed to have the entire company looking down at me, and only minutes later an ambulance arrived....lol

No turning back so had to milk it, whilst I had electrodes all over me, and was assured I was ok and it was obviously a panic attack!

Less than an hour later I was sitting in the sunshine, outside the pub with the family, and waiting for my food to arrive.

Any other time I just left when I wanted, because it was recognised that, on other occasions, I came in early, worked through lunch and stayed till late.