The Christmas Disaster ?

Large supermarket chain will fail to deliver some lady's Turkey, ruining Christmas for her and her family.

The oven will break on Christmas morning

My Mums oven took an hour to get working last Xmas hope it works this year or it's sarnies

Cue Card and Thistlecrack will both fall in the King George.

Diane Abbott goes on a diet and Hackney supermarkets go skint.

My dishwasher packed up this afternoon...I going to cook as much as I can in disposable tin foil trays on Christmas day.

"Cue Card and Thistlecrack will both fall in the King George"

One year Mrs Mustang forgot to put the Pol Roger in the fridge early enough with the net result us having to serve fizz which wasn't 100% chilled. I've never been so humiliated in my life.

Lambrini^

My Auntie went to check on the turkey on Christmas morning and two hours later my Uncle found her dead on the kitchen floor

Poor bugger, he must have been starving.

roma better win tonight or it is on the streets for xmas for  Mrs Mo!!!!!

"My Auntie went to check on the turkey on Christmas morning and two hours later my Uncle found her dead on the kitchen floor"

quake in israel?

This is from an article in the Daily Mail online, about the Queen's Christmas at Sandringham where they always have a 20ft Christmas tree....

"Only once has there been a disaster with the tree. That was in 2008 when a footman tripped and fell into it, bringing it crashing down in a mess of pine needles and shattered baubles just 30 minutes before the Queen was due to give it the final touches."

That really is a true disaster and makes my Aunt dying pale into insignificance

family christmas about 10 years ago,the electrics all went,had to get an emergency electrician out 1 o clock halfway through cooking christmas dinner.took about 3 hours to sort it out as the previous owner was a fireman who fancied himself as a handyman and had the house wired upside down back to front.

a fireman-the irony!

Managed to get my Mums oven going thank God

The Queen is taken ill and Nicola Sturgeon does the 15 minute speech to the nation on Christmas Day.

Better than Corbyn doing it

"My Auntie went to check on the turkey on Christmas morning and two hours later my Uncle found her dead on the kitchen floor"

Was the turkey ok?

Handed some washed knickers back to my girlfriend this morning................apparently they are not hers.

jamie oliver

Turkeys between 4-6kg should be rested for 1½ hours, and ones from 6-10kg can rest for two hours

auntie timing was perfect

fav auntie reveals xmas prez to you during xmas meal,and you have fcuk all

dont eat the last chipolata




http://www.bbc.co.uk/bbcthree/item/785b2111-9c0c-449b-939e-e54fed7ad0b0

Puncture

My Mrs has had the turkey on since 6pm last night, she likes to make sure it's well done Think I'll eat mine with a hammer and chisel.

Sorry to hear about your Auntie, tonic, XMas must be the most stressful time of the year.