How come Tarzan never has a beard?

this will offend me I know

why isn't tarzan a woman? - it is an imperialist, warmongering, misogynist, dictating, capitalist construct.

I know coz I read it in the guardian

Why does Jessica Rabbit show her bust off in cartoons and not cover up?

has she had a boob job or are they natural ?

See, we have been brainwashed. Everything good and of authority was made white. We look at Jesus, we see a white with blond hair and blue eyes. We look at all the angels, we see white with blond hair and blue eyes. Now, I'm sure if there's a heaven in the sky and the colored folks die and go to heaven, where are the colored angels? They must be in the kitchen preparing the milk and honey. We look at Miss America, we see white. We look at Miss World, we see white. We look at Miss Universe, we see white. Even Tarzan, the king of the jungle in black Africa, he's white!

/\

http://www.filmlight.ltd.uk/store/wp-content/uploads/2016/07/legend-tarzan-spots.jpg

yeah but the attacker with the gun is black so it equals it up

Cos the coont is full of stods..

guiness did you mean to add that t on the third word?

in the old cowboy movies the good guys all wore white hats and were clean shaven while the bad guys has black hats and had beards.

Zorro wore a black hat and had an East German lady tache..

use all needs to go to the guardian re-education KAMP

think I will do a double zorro to win his next two challenges.
betfair open a book zorro v the rest

The Lone Ranger wore a mask and a very camp outfit

The Lone Ranger wore a mask and a very camp outfit

Always thought that The Lone Rangers gear influenced the outfits in Blazing Saddles.

Heard in the school playground:

''Tarzan swings Tarzan falls. Jane catches him by his balls.''

They don't write 'em like that any more.

Edgar Rice Burrough's passage explaining WHY :

"After the abduction of Jane Porter, Tarzan grew ever more restless as each day passed without a sighting of the maiden. Yet soon Tarzan found Jane's skirt and hair caught in branches alongside the thick clumps of Burraygo the monkey master's fur.

In an effort to enrage Burraygo and his minions, Tarzan made his face and body clean by shaving with broken bottles left behind by rich hunters. Thus, Burraygo and his hooting, chattering troop would ever differentiate this hairless white ape from themselves...Tarzan would remain clean shaven as a mark of pride and refreshment until the day he departed from the impenetrable jungle with Miss Jane."

brassneck, some things haven't changed.

today the bad guys still wear black and have beards

but once again the forum answered my question,we all learned today that tarzan shaved with a broken bottle,thanks to Velasquez.
so we can store the information in our minds in case sometime later in the path of life someone might say"how come tarzan is clean shaved"and we will know the answer

In one early episode he was assaulted by the depilator, a villain that steals testosterone from Hunky Monkeys. He fought back, but the depilator used up his mojo. Tarzan only recovered by ingesting the energy from the Kumanji tree. The rejuvinating new Drink now available at all Disney Stores.

"As the French hunting party set camp at the edge of the village that night, Colonel Danone pressed Jane about her ordeal at the monkey hands of Burraygo. Jane stood up and began to shiver with suppressed emotion. A brawl quickly broke out amongst the French as Danone's comments were considered to be ungentlemanly by some.

"Bouteilles cassees?!" cried Danone, "A familiar salutation indeed from this perfidious white English savage! A man, so called, who could not rescue you in time from your inconveniences brought about by fevered monkeys!"

Jane ran from the encampment in tears, into the arms of Tarzan, who had traded the French soldiers some jungle beads for a packet of ten Bic Sensitive razors."

Get digging.

How do you shave your own face, Bodil?

I pluck them individually while screaming "you've been an enormous disappointment to me" at them.

Why do you ask?

Iask - I mean I ask - because shaving ITSELF seems to be driving this thread...I myself am disappointed in the lack of available bearded emoticons.

Well, I guess 'we' really have had enough.  But that's not enough.  Now we must punish them.

Pleasingly ironic that our Brexit-hating elite who fled to New York and similar liberal refuges get a double dose.



Keep digging (and remember to install a toilet).

Hey man, you're going in the wrong direction!

Not at all - my last ex became a prepper and has a ranch dug into a hill in Idaho.  I've got a permanent invitation.  Though I'll probably stay here and browse on the liberal financial-political-economic elite as they stampede from coffee shop to plastic surgeon.  Yum.

"In the morning, Jane said nothing, yet those long, miserable nights of bondage at the hands of monkeys had been expunged. As the Abbysinian cavalry finally rode north, she saw nothing peculiar in Tarzan's plan to use a straight cut-throat razor and carbolic soap that had been obtained from Fenstermacher the Bavarian trader."

TARZAN AND THE JEWELS OF OFOPAR.

Jane was his beard.

I have a great idea,TARZAN SOAP.buy one and get one tree .

And of course Soap on a rope for christmas

very strange
everyone in the jungle has a beard esp the vulnerable children

[   This image is no longer available.   ]

.