Chit Chat
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Not really sure why I am posting this but here goes...
I recently started a new job at a big media company in London - a big household name. This is after years of working for organisations that could barely be described as medium sized - I did 7 years in a public sector organisation in an office with just two other people (although everyone knew each other in the building and there were lots of social events) and then my last 2 years have been spent at a startup with around 40 people although working alongside a finance team of just two others.
The new place is huge - 5 floors of open plan offices and I am based in the finance department all on one floor - there is as many people in this finance department as there was in my last company. It's a reputable place and many, many people seem to have long and happy careers there. It was supposed to be a hugely positive change in direction for me and having been made redundant from my dream job a couple of years ago I went in with high hopes (it was supposed to be the escape from my rut and worries of job security that comes with a startup).
However, having been there for 10 weeks now and approaching the end of my probation period I feel like I am really struggling to settle in. I don't think I have had one positive thing to say about the place since starting (from my own point of view).
The role itself is something I think I will be fine with, I initially struggled at first but seem to be getting the hang of it now. My team and supervisor are all based out in America and they have hired me in London to provide finance support to the EMEA Sales team (which is based in the same building as me but on a different floor) as the time difference between here and America wasn't working for them or their clients.
I've never worked in a large company before and am definitely going through some adjustment around that. In addition to this, it's quite a "cold" place on a personal level. It's not uncommon for colleagues with whom you may be working directly behind a few feet away to not have even spoken to each other. Some people don't even say good morning to their immediate team when they arrive and leave in the evening without saying a word anyone else as they put their coat on and walk out.
My biggest problem is the isolation. I literally have nothing to do even on a work level with anyone else based in the office so there is zero contact whatsoever. When I started back in July I was placed on a spare desk with the credit control team who had their own team dynamic and kept themselves largely to themselves - they would go to lunch together as a team, etc. I wasn't introduced to anyone else in the department or even shown around the building and the various teams are mostly tight knit and friends amongst themselves. Last week it got 10 times worse as there was a desk move and I was dumped on a bank of 6 spare desks by myself. I have literally gone the entire week without speaking to another human being and it has really gotten to me. I'm thinking negatively and my anxiety is through the roof - I dread going in and feel like everyday is my first day.
I haven't bought any of this up with my supervisor as she is based in America and so our contact is mostly limited to work related issues, she comes across as very professional and she trained me relatively well given the challenges of doing it over the phone and sharing screens or talking over IM. I also don't want to come across as moaning about where I'm sitting as it sounds like something a child would do especially as it sounds like her office in America is made up of those cubicles that you see in American movies.
I thought I would give it some time as I am fairly shy (probably minor social anxiety) and so always take some time to settle and make new friends when I start a new job but after almost 3 months it just doesn't feel like it is going to happen here. I know that companies have different cultures but having come from a startup environment where almost everyone was friendly & outgoing and there was so many out of office activities to a place where I am effectively the office loner is pretty depressing.
As I say, it's been a few weeks now and I'm in a bad way mentally about the company and working environment. I'm not really sure what to do. I don't want this to sound like I'm moaning but what was supposed to be a great move for me feels like anything but.
Does anyone have any similar experiences?
I recently started a new job at a big media company in London - a big household name. This is after years of working for organisations that could barely be described as medium sized - I did 7 years in a public sector organisation in an office with just two other people (although everyone knew each other in the building and there were lots of social events) and then my last 2 years have been spent at a startup with around 40 people although working alongside a finance team of just two others.
The new place is huge - 5 floors of open plan offices and I am based in the finance department all on one floor - there is as many people in this finance department as there was in my last company. It's a reputable place and many, many people seem to have long and happy careers there. It was supposed to be a hugely positive change in direction for me and having been made redundant from my dream job a couple of years ago I went in with high hopes (it was supposed to be the escape from my rut and worries of job security that comes with a startup).
However, having been there for 10 weeks now and approaching the end of my probation period I feel like I am really struggling to settle in. I don't think I have had one positive thing to say about the place since starting (from my own point of view).
The role itself is something I think I will be fine with, I initially struggled at first but seem to be getting the hang of it now. My team and supervisor are all based out in America and they have hired me in London to provide finance support to the EMEA Sales team (which is based in the same building as me but on a different floor) as the time difference between here and America wasn't working for them or their clients.
I've never worked in a large company before and am definitely going through some adjustment around that. In addition to this, it's quite a "cold" place on a personal level. It's not uncommon for colleagues with whom you may be working directly behind a few feet away to not have even spoken to each other. Some people don't even say good morning to their immediate team when they arrive and leave in the evening without saying a word anyone else as they put their coat on and walk out.
My biggest problem is the isolation. I literally have nothing to do even on a work level with anyone else based in the office so there is zero contact whatsoever. When I started back in July I was placed on a spare desk with the credit control team who had their own team dynamic and kept themselves largely to themselves - they would go to lunch together as a team, etc. I wasn't introduced to anyone else in the department or even shown around the building and the various teams are mostly tight knit and friends amongst themselves. Last week it got 10 times worse as there was a desk move and I was dumped on a bank of 6 spare desks by myself. I have literally gone the entire week without speaking to another human being and it has really gotten to me. I'm thinking negatively and my anxiety is through the roof - I dread going in and feel like everyday is my first day.
I haven't bought any of this up with my supervisor as she is based in America and so our contact is mostly limited to work related issues, she comes across as very professional and she trained me relatively well given the challenges of doing it over the phone and sharing screens or talking over IM. I also don't want to come across as moaning about where I'm sitting as it sounds like something a child would do especially as it sounds like her office in America is made up of those cubicles that you see in American movies.
I thought I would give it some time as I am fairly shy (probably minor social anxiety) and so always take some time to settle and make new friends when I start a new job but after almost 3 months it just doesn't feel like it is going to happen here. I know that companies have different cultures but having come from a startup environment where almost everyone was friendly & outgoing and there was so many out of office activities to a place where I am effectively the office loner is pretty depressing.
As I say, it's been a few weeks now and I'm in a bad way mentally about the company and working environment. I'm not really sure what to do. I don't want this to sound like I'm moaning but what was supposed to be a great move for me feels like anything but.
Does anyone have any similar experiences?
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Replies: 47
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i am on betfair most days working in a small box room and hardly ever see anyone ..... i think i have cabin fever
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Do something to take you mind off the isolation, music or radio. Get out at lunch time and meet up with someone you know. Have a look at noticeboard for groups or get in touch with HR about activities, might be sh1te, might meet someone who feels the same
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I personally would never work for an American company, they just seem too controlling and dictating over their overseas subsidiaries
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sounds very similar to a position i was in 10 years ago. it drove me bonkers and made me realise what a load of bollox working is really. You spend most of your life with people that you wouldn't let tie your shoe laces up. i cant really advise you what to do ... you have to sort that out for yourself. For what its worth one day i just fcuked off one lunchtime finito. i have never worked since that day and dont regret it for one minute. sure i have to cut my cloth accordingly but i am much happier than i have ever been.
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Brendan could well be right. You will probably find other people feel the same as you.
Maybe you could make it your mission to bring more joy into the workplace  I couldn't think of anything worse than working in the envirinment you describe. Good luck |
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I find this is common with big companies. All looks attractive from the outside but when you get in realisation kicks in. Because they are a big company and pay better they expect more from you...they attract individuals who work there for ages who are motivated by ££££ and not much else...and because there are so many long-timers it can be difficult to fit in. Try to collar some fellow newbies who feel the same would be my advise and/or accept any social invitations that come your way.
I've always found working for smaller companies better, but of course they pay less so it's catch 22. |
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Can you relocate to work on the same floor as the sales team you are meant to be supporting? Doesn't have to be a "moaning" suggestion, make it sound like a practical suggestion, which it probably is anyway.
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Yep I have suggested it and my boss even said it was supposed to happen but at the moment there is no sign of it forthcoming. It is in the one ray of light that is keeping me sane and the reason I haven't walked already.
I guess with her being in America it means the bureaucracy and logistics of making these things happen is extremely slow. I even asked her if I should reach out to the sales team leader about getting a desk sorted for myself down there but she said definitely not to do that but didn't give a reason why - some kind of history/office politics maybe? The Finance Manager who manages the floor that I am on doesn't give a damn about me, he has said in the friendliest way possible that he wants me moved downstairs and the whole desk move was down to him. I don't blame him for putting me on the spare desks as I am not part of his department at all and he's kind of been lumbered with me but it's so depressing walking in every morning to a completely empty batch of desks. It's another thing that's hard to adjust with working for a big company - having a set desk with a big desktop computer. At the startup I had a laptop and could go and sit pretty much anywhere within reason. I've been applying for other jobs tonight, the realisation that until my probation ends I only have to give a weeks notice so going to see if I can maybe land something else. |
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You couldn't bet the odds on that this probation period will end with a handshake and the best of luck.
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Get out quick...company sounds like a load of rubbish to me
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You don't say what age group you are in!
Reading between the lines I am thinking youare only in your twenties so have a long career ahead of you. My first comment was going to be just get out of the place if you are so screwed up being there. Then I re-read this which seems to contradict your feelings about yourself..... "I've never worked in a large company before and am definitely going through some adjustment around that. In addition to this, it's quite a "cold" place on a personal level. It's not uncommon for colleagues with whom you may be working directly behind a few feet away to not have even spoken to each other. Some people don't even say good morning to their immediate team when they arrive and leave in the evening without saying a word anyone else as they put their coat on and walk out". Work is work, not a social experience. I've been self employed since '82 but one company that I worked with gave me a work station in "Contracts/Order Progression". All female staff and it was like a ****ing zoo in there. Small wonder they made so many mistakes, and I couldn't concentrate, nor speak as I wanted to on the phone with my personal team. This was a custom built £1.5 million facility but quickly outgrown so they had a"Portakabin" type building into which I managed to take half as my own office, which was a different class. I only spent a couple of hours there sorting out the guys before getting off for more important stuff. Either go, or put on the headphones, as someone else said, and read the quote above as it aint just you! Have your social media sites open to stop yourself going insane, and keep a lookout for something else, if you can't hack it! |
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Ever looked up at the many high rise buildings in your city(In my case,Melbourne.) and wondered just how productive the workers are that sit on a computer all day?
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For me, I think you need to remind yourself that it's just the place you go to so you can pay your bills and afford the things that make life fun outside of work. Make sure you have something to look forward to at the end of the day, a game of footy, a few beers with the lads, a guitar lesson. If you're allowed an ipod or radio on your pc then use that (it's amazing how much faster the day can be when the morning is a countdown to lunch then Radcliffe & Maconie, and by the time that finishes it's 4!)
Another point I'd say is that you're getting some very valuable experience of working at a big organisation. It looks brilliant on a cv for future employers. If you can stick it out a year or two you could be in a position to choose your own company. Also, Christmas with it's office party and some nights out is only a few weeks away. It's amazing how many boundaries are broken down at these. |
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Good advice from ours4keeps, particularly about having something to look forward to in the evening and seeing the job as a means to doing other stuff.
It would be different if things were being made bad by the behaviour of another colleague but that isn’t the case here so given time (and Xmas parties!), things should improve. The fact that there are a lot of people working there is a bonus as you are much more likely to find someone with similar interests to you. |
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I'd suggest a daily walk to get you out of the office. I go out for a 20-30 min walk every day and listen to music on my walk. Fresh air, sunshine if you're lucky, but just a break from your work environment. I worked for 28 years for large companies and the main issues in one of two companies, was the demanding workload. You'd have your full time job, then six pages of objectives to do through the year! At the end of the year some managers would spend more time talking to you about the 5% you had not completed, rather than the 95% you had! It was very demoralising at times. Also, when real pay rises effectively came to an end, you felt less and less motivated.
As you get older, you don't need any additional stress. I now work in a small company. You know everyone, they work at a much slower pace. There is no them and us culture of management and staff at this company. When I look back at my experience with one large company, I'm very glad I now work at a small company. I work in such a way that I do a lot of work in a relatively short space of time and then have quite a lot of free time. I spend a lot of time on the internet and have found subscriptions to 2 news websites has given me interesting content to read. Despite spending a lot of time on the internet, I complete significantly more work than the two lazy 6its I work with! One bloke is counting out his last few years. The other person, a woman, is very lazy. |
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The irony of working for a large organisation is you have probably never felt more lonely in your life, is three months long enough to realise this is not for you ?
Probably yes but like someone else said hang on till the end of the year & if you still feel that way then look for another job. |
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I'd buy a few lotto tickets.
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Zazu
02 Oct 15 01:25 Joined: 06 Apr 11 | Topic/replies: 3,383 | Blogger: Zazu's blog Should count yourself lucky you managed to get the job imo Sounds like you have zero social skills. Unfair and unhelpful. Besides, the OP has said he probably has mild social anxiety. Anyway, you say you work in finance. There must be plenty of jobs in your field. Some good advice on here, but if it was me, I would leave before it made me ill. Although I would probably leave it until the New Year unless the situation became intolerable. Have you considered consulting your GP about your social anxiety? GL |
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Ask to move to the same floor as the sales team you are supporting to "be more effective".
My suggestion is you bring up the subject with the US people if possible. Before I retired I worked as a one person finance person for a 240 person business unit in a 1500 employee company. I was based half a mile from the main finance area. There was no input into the running of the unit or how the info was kept (badly kept of course). It was all operational people. It was just dig into the rubbishy info on the system and produce sparkling finance stuff. The place was full of "interesting" people. One guys had three offices (isyn). Think of Father Jack (in the father Ted series) and that would describe most there. I took early retirement after two years in that unit. It took 14 months from application to exit. I think no one else wanted to accept the position. |
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Thanks for the replies guys, mostly all very helpful and has given me a lot to think about.
Yes I had CBT last year for my social anxiety which helped a bit. It is extremely minor and I am usually fine. It really manifests itself in places like this where I haven’t for want of a better word made to be felt welcome or made any friends. I am not expecting any special treatment or people just to accept me into a social circle but it is quite soul destroying being put on a table by myself and being an introvert by nature has made me retreat further into my shell. I think the worst thing is that it becomes a vicious cycle as it makes me miserable and so I probably come across as unapproachable. There are a few jobs in finance but I am unqualified in specialist finance subjects and have no desire to study the ACCA or anything like that and so my options are limited as that rules out most accountancy level jobs and so I basically am doing more glorified admin jobs that involve finance. Somebody asked me earlier my age – I’m 35 so fairly far along in my career although have only ever had two major jobs which were at workplaces where I guess I fitted in from the off or at least didn’t feel like I had this much anxiety. |
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richdeniro 02 Oct 15 12:24
Somebody asked me earlier my age – I’m 35 so fairly far along in my career Still 30 plus years to go Rich, if you have to try something new its far from too late. |
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An alternative point of view.
Many years ago I got a job for a big company in a new dept. A floor of the office was kitted out for us. It turned out to be a flop and people drifted away. After a year I was the only one left and as I was self employed and bringing in business they said I could stay on. I had the entire floor of the building to myself. Downstairs they were packed in like sardines and they would ask if I'd like to move down there because I must be lonely. The fact is I loved it. No annoying office banter, I could come and go as I pleased, sit out on the fire escape in the sun, push chairs together and have a nap. I think they regarded me as the mad man in the attic. It was a sad day when they said they wanted their office back. |
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Zazu
Zazu 02 Oct 15 01:25 Joined: 06 Apr 11 | Topic/replies: 3,385 | Blogger: Zazu's blog Should count yourself lucky you managed to get the job imo Sounds like you have zero social skills. ^ Something you obviously relate to ! ps you sound like a rite ****. |
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Worked for the same firm in diff jobs for 35 yrs
You will never be happy take the cash and enjoy your time away from work that is the best advice I was given from fellas the had done 50 years plus............. |
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that *
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Being that this is in London, the majority of people would appear to be self centered and aloof.
Don't read too much into this, but my experience of trying to converse with anyone in a London based business is nigh on impossible, as I never seem to get someone who speaks understandable English. Always foreign types, who speak like a ****ing machine gun, and who are incapable of slowing down when I suggest we will get there a lot quicker if they will! Ask yourself if you really want to be "pally" with these people. Just be as aloof as they are, get on with the job without interruptions and, as I said before, just be grateful to have your own space. |
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One question I would ask is how is your job going. Are you actually managing to do the job you were paid for?
That is the most important thing. It appears you are just sharing office space with others. So you are fact working for yourself. The only people you need to relate are the EMAA sales team who you are supporting. So get to know them. Otherwise take Thin and Crispys advice just come and go as you need to. Just a smile or nod to others on your floor that is all you need. It may take a lot longer to get to know people than 10 weeks. My advice would be to ensure you are doing your job well. not a lot else matters But if you are really that unhappy with it move on |
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I would wait for the end of your probationary period, when I assume your Supervisor
will comment on your performance. She will ask you how you feel about things surely, you could bring this up It could be nobody else knows what you there for, they may think you are just an agency worker and wont be staying anyway. It sounds a very cold place, but I assume you are being paid extra money. If you really cannot adapt look for another job. |
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I wish you well Richderino...This is just one phase in your life and will be something you look back on as a blip when you are working in a place that suits you better and enjoying happier days.
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Rich,youve got a bf a/c but still need to go out to work?whats going on mate?
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London ,are you from London ?
Im from London started work for a big company in the North East ,can honestly say I have never met more friendy people in my life ,I no longer work there due to suffering health problems but the people I met there are all my friends on FB .. Ive worked in London ,totally different experience ,people very self centred and can deffo be clicky in offices ,just the way it is there ... |
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People is the north are much more friendly. Those in the south largely keep themselves to themselves.
ca 30 years ago. myself & some friends met some women from Southport on holiday. They invited up up for a weekend and we all went out Friday & Saturday. The local people were mostly really friendly. You'd get women come up and talk to you in the pub that you had never met. That's a million chance down in the south. |
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some of us are still hopeing Stow
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Thanks again for the replies. I do interact with the sales team but it is mostly over email and the occasional meeting rather than in an office environment.
I've just received a calendar invite for a one on one call with my manager which is scheduled for the day my probation period ends on the 21st. I will maybe ask about moving to the floor where the sales team sit then. Do people recommend I should mention the fact I do feel a little isolated where I am sat? As in let her know I'm sat completely alone on a bank of 6 desks and it feels a little weird that I have very little interaction with the people around me? |
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Do people recommend I should mention the fact I do feel a little isolated where I am sat?
Absolutely not! Put it in a different way, such as "It surely can't be efficient for a person connected to a specific department, to not be 'hands on' within that department". Cut out the me, me, me, feeling sorry for myself, bullshit! |
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It's not what you say, it's the way that you say it!
E.g. "You've really hurt and upset me"...which prompts a reply such as "Well you deserve it". Put another way "I feel really hurt and upset"....which may receive a response such as "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to upset you"! |
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Rich, stop worrying about being introvert, that is you and is not gonna change. Just be yourself, look how many people have replied on here with friendly advice and responses.
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We give better advice than Jeremy Kyle on here
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I have managed to get a interview for another job on Monday which I think the work environment will be much better for me.
I am sure they will ask why I want to leave my current role having only been there for 3 months. What would be a good answer for this? |