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14 Jul 15 14:29
Date Joined: 22 Mar 14
| Topic/replies: 162 | Blogger: Vatour's blog
Has anyone got any advice on a particular product they have been happy with. Did you lay it yourself or does it need to be done professionally?
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Report Aunty Post July 14, 2015 4:29 PM BST
Seeing as there are, probably,less than one in a thousand who have the stuff and, equally considering the profile of members on here,
I think you may be asking in the wrong area.

Seriously I only ever have seen it once, and that is on a property in the village.

It looks ridiculous, and is well matched by everything else they have done, which can only be described as in the school of absolute "Twee"!
Report lfc1971 July 14, 2015 4:32 PM BST
Ghastly stuff, should be banned.
Report Aunty Post July 14, 2015 4:33 PM BST
Apologies for my usual bad punctuation, and a correction, as I think one in ten thousand could be closer to the truth!
Report boxingthefox July 14, 2015 4:42 PM BST
They opened a Hungry Horse (The Steam Turbine)in Rugby last year near Currys PC World, spotted it on the way to Currys.  Artificial grass, plastic plants including  plastic palm trees!!!. I had a walk around the garden just to satisfy myself that I was not dreaming, fck knows what the food is like. The whole thing looked ridiculous. Chavvey and Twee does not describe it adequately.
Report Aunty Post July 14, 2015 4:50 PM BST
Yes but, did they have a windmill and a Flamingo on one leg?
Report boxingthefox July 14, 2015 5:00 PM BST
AP, I think I saw a plastic rabbit and plastic Koi in the fake pool Laugh it would actually be appropriate as the place is frequented by Diddy-Koi's, apparently!!
Report SlippyBlue July 14, 2015 5:57 PM BST
My next door neighbour has it, part patio the rest astroturf. It looks ok but wouldn't be for me. The previous owner did it and from what I can remember he did it himself and was relatively inexpensive.

By the way A.P. what exactly, in your opinion is "the profile of members on here"?
Report boxingthefox July 14, 2015 6:09 PM BST
Slippy why do you want to know about our "members" and their profiles, I don't think anything  has changed it's either Cavalier or Roundhead, ShockedLaughLaugh
Report SlippyBlue July 14, 2015 6:21 PM BST
I don't btf, I was just curious as to what AP's opinion was of people on here as he stated that considering the profile of the members it's unlikely anyone would know anything about artificial grass which I thought was a rather odd thing to say!
Report boxingthefox July 14, 2015 6:24 PM BST
Just joshing Slippy, WinkHappy
Report screaming from beneaththewaves July 14, 2015 7:13 PM BST
Don't expect to be able to lie out on your "lawn" in the summer. The thermal mass of this stuff means it stores vast amounts of heat on sunny days. Any pets won't be able to walk on it.

Also will soon look a mess if you have kids playing on it and wearing it down. This stuff doesn't grow back.
Report bigH July 14, 2015 8:17 PM BST
great for practicing your chipping
Report DEFCON [1] July 14, 2015 10:49 PM BST
If you go for the right stuff it's brilliant. Mines taken a pounding and still looks good.

Don't go for anything too long (30mm) as it will flatten easily. Also, go for the type that has the brownish moss effect layer woven in.

Try ordering samples from Tiger Turf.

Fitting wise - Over chalk you'll need to compact about 1 1/2 - 2" of sharp sand with a compacting plate (slightly more for clay) use a long straight edge to get the sand flat.
It also looks better if it's butted up to perimeter walls/ sleepers etc (tacking it down at the edges is optional). Once fitted throw on a dusting a patio sand.

And no, it doesn't get hot in the summer.
Report akabula July 15, 2015 12:14 AM BST
I've only seen it once in a private setting. Looked hideous tbh. Hardly wildlife friendly either.
Report Facts July 15, 2015 12:53 AM BST
Product details

If you're after a super natural look then the Nomow Luxury Artificial grass is for you. The long four colour pile and rich thatch has a show garden appearance.

Effect: Very realistic. Long length soft pile produces top quality rich realistic results to wow the neighbours.
Usage: Excellent for pets, gardens and play areas. Pet safe and good for children.
Width: 4m roll.
Height: 30mm.
Length: Enter into the quantity box, the number of metres you require for your length. For example, 5 will give you a length of 5m (20sq m coverage).
All orders will be received as 1 roll of artificial grass, not in metre strips.
Report THERE....IS....NO....SPOOOOON July 15, 2015 11:47 AM BST

"Copying" anything is inherently "dubious". 

Copying something "natural" magnifies the difficulty.

I'm a hard marker.

SOME of the artificial grass I see (and I see alot), base prepared and layed PROPERLY ,

can't deny looks fantastic.

Apart from the "no-mow" angle, the (variable) water restrictions in Australia made it very popular.

As for getting "hot"...I think Australian consumers would have made a serious noise about that...I haven't heard it.

Report Hound-Dog-2 July 15, 2015 12:00 PM BST
A family down the road had their front garden done over a year ago, it was professionally done.  At first I thought it looked too perfect too artificial.  But now with a year of sun and rain on it I would say it looks ok although I wouldn't have it myself.
Report Vatour July 15, 2015 1:40 PM BST
Thanks for the advice, it would have to look very close to the real thing in order for me to do it. I don't want an astro turf look.
Report Aunty Post July 15, 2015 3:42 PM BST
Have to look just out of interest....

The Touch of Luxury is created with our silky soft fibres; enriched with a deep thatch to create a feeling of lying down on a cloud!.

What a load of *****!
Report screaming from beneaththewaves July 15, 2015 4:54 PM BST
Be aware that having installed an artificial lawn you will then be required to install 2 grand's worth of stereo in your motor, enter the People's Postcode Lottery and buy the wife a Burberry handbag.
Report Aunty Post July 16, 2015 9:32 AM BST
Just wondering if they do it with stripes, or if you have to do your own!
Report G1_Jockey_4 July 16, 2015 9:43 AM BST
never tried artificial ....

is it the same buzz as grass?
Report Pastie July 16, 2015 10:04 AM BST
I laid artificial turf myself in my back garden. We had a patch of dirt about 8m long and 2m wide.

I was quite lucky because the dirt was already packed in so I only needed to do a bit of preparation before I could lay it. 

The only issue I had was carrying the roll I bought because it weighed a ton, so make sure you get some help.  Also, make sure you pay a bit extra for the good stuff.

Laying it was a doddle, and a couple of years later it still looks really good.
Report Pastie July 16, 2015 10:08 AM BST
Also, if you need help or ideas check out YouTube. There are plenty of videos on there offering help.
Report polybot July 17, 2015 10:24 AM BST
how often do you need to hoover it?
Report Hound-Dog-2 July 17, 2015 11:05 AM BST
A family down the road had an artificial lawn professionally done a year ago, I have just nipped out and took a photo for you, just waiting for 'pending approval' on here and you can see it.

At first it did look ridiculously green and fake, it doesn't look so bad now from a slight distance, but close-up it does look artificial. I'd say if you are going to get one use a good quality artificial grass and have it installed properly.
Report spellingandgrammarchecker July 17, 2015 12:34 PM BST
Do you have to cut it with an artificial mower?
Report Aunty Post July 17, 2015 12:39 PM BST
If all this plastic/simulated rubbish goes much further, it will be like "Leggo Land".

Painted roofs

Plastic doors and windows

That hideous plastic tile edging etc.

I recall a few years back someone tried to sell those illuminated, white plastic road centre signs to the Germans.

The German's response was  "Wir sind noch nicht bereit für die Kunststoff auf den Straßen"!
Report spellingandgrammarchecker July 17, 2015 1:16 PM BST
Well, you cant argue with that, and indeed, why would you?
Report Hound-Dog-2 July 17, 2015 3:24 PM BST
Here's that pic of a neighbour's artificial lawn.  From a distance it looks like the real thing and looks just like a very well kept lawn, almost too perfect. But no matter how expensive it will always look false close-up. I was also wondering about the drainage, because natural turf will soak up the rain, not sure about this stuff (?)

Personally I'd never have it, but depends what you want I suppose, advantages and disadvantages to it.

Report akabula July 17, 2015 3:26 PM BST
Brutal for our wildlife.
Report Aunty Post July 17, 2015 4:16 PM BST
Don't be surprised if you have it, and wake up to find it gone!

The gypsies and travelers would think nothing of rolling it up and away!
Report Aunty Post July 17, 2015 4:18 PM BST
Stick in a few plastic dandelions and some clover for authenticity.
Report screaming from beneaththewaves July 17, 2015 10:57 PM BST
Love the join down the middle.Laugh

Also the cunning way they've laid the plastic right up to the house wall, preventing damp from evaporating.

(AP: "Wir sind noch nicht bereit für den Kunststoff auf den Straßen!")
Report screaming from beneaththewaves July 17, 2015 11:01 PM BST
I suppose it wouldn't necessarily stop me from buying a house. All I'd need is a 20 grand discount for the cost and hassle of removing the plastic, finding somebody prepared to accept it all for disposal and then buying and laying turf.
Report Aunty Post July 18, 2015 11:05 AM BST
Thanks sfbtw....

Wir sind noch nicht bereit für Kunststoff auf den Straßen!
Report THERE....IS....NO....SPOOOOON July 18, 2015 11:30 AM BST
pic looks nothing like the quality I have seen Mischief
Report Hound-Dog-2 July 18, 2015 11:42 AM BST
^ the very worst quality ones look like that stuff you see in the greengrocers.
Report Coachbuster July 4, 2016 7:15 PM BST
lay real turf you lazy oiks   Devil
Report Coachbuster July 4, 2016 7:15 PM BST
a little tip when laying turf,

Remember - it's Green side up
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