Wonga

Wonga’s CEO, Norman Buggger-Crumpets, said “The irony isn’t lost on us.”

“I’ve begged our collections team to let us off the hook, but we’ve programmed them to be single-minded heartless w@nk-pheasants of the highest order.”

“They’ve told us we either have to pay up, or some thoroughly terrifying men will come to take anything that isn’t nailed down, and maybe have a go on my wife.”

“It’s simultaneously a testament to our extensive training program, and a massive pain in my @rse.”