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I was falling in love, but now I'm only falling apart. Nothing I can do, a total eclipse of the heart.
Wise words indeed.
Wise words indeed.
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DID YOU KNOW THAT MARIA CALLAS ATE A TAPE WORM IN A RAW BEEFY MEAL JUST TO GET THIN, BODIL? AND HENCE SHE DESTROYED THE COLOSSAL VOICE SHE POSSESSED AS A FAT BURD! 
I may be mad, I may be blind, I may be viciously unkind but I can still read what you're thinking.
BOXINGTHEFOX - DOES THAT MEAN HE GETS THE VAST MAJORITY OF THE ROYALTIES??
I'm pretty sure some dominant tape worms post on here.
DID YOU KNOW THAT MARIA CALLAS ATE A TAPE WORM , did they tape that episode of her life,
I'll get me cape.
I'll get me cape.
There was a guy in the news last week with a tapeworm in his brain, they had MRI scans of it moving.
Not sure what his forum name was but I've got some suspicions
Not sure what his forum name was but I've got some suspicions
BOXINGTHEFOX - DOES THAT MEAN HE GETS THE VAST MAJORITY OF THE ROYALTIES?? Angry, I honestly don't know, just know it's an iconic song, brilliantly sung.
The tape worm sang a line from a U2 song when it was in Callas' stomach :
"You're the reason why
The Opera's in me..."
I'll get me silver-topped cane...
"You're the reason why
The Opera's in me..."
I'll get me silver-topped cane...
I've started to write a song with the working title of poached eggs- Have gleaned ideas from other songs 
this could be a chart topper!
this could be a chart topper!
I always felt - slight - regret about the sh%t I post late at night. Thank you for making me feel less bad about me.
Crags - are they poached in a special poached-egg pan or just a normal pan that poaches eggs?
Just stick them in a pan of boiling water with a bit of vinegar in it.
The fans used to send Callas super-expensive chocolates but she wouldn't touch them...instead, she would send out for dirt cheap Three Musketeers candy bars from the local newsagent...
Vel, earlier I got myself a "darkies walloper and chips, when was the last time you did?
I used to have demons in my room at night. Desire, despair, desire, so many monsters.
Do you swirl the water, Crags, like Gary Rhodes? I think you should be quite specific - in the song, like :
I swirl the water
Just like I oughter
Them lovely soft yolks
Feed the crazee folks
Like Shep and John Noakes
Blah blah blah etc.
I swirl the water
Just like I oughter
Them lovely soft yolks
Feed the crazee folks
Like Shep and John Noakes
Blah blah blah etc.
- stick to haddock n chips maself!
Eventually the fish will be coming for you, Vel. Natural justice. Your guttyguts easing the Greenland migration. Give and take.
I posted that Annie Lennox tune elsewhere not too long ago...
Just googled 3-Musketeers candy...looks like a USA equivalent of a Mars' bar or Milky Way...
I used to be lunatic from the gracious days
I used to be woebegone and so restless nights
I used to be woebegone and so restless nights
Oh Vel, I'm sick at heart over this latest England/Scotland sh&te. We are going to split and everyone will lose - but Scotland the most. All the talent/money will go south - and beyond. How did we let these f*ckwits get hold of the levers of power?
Eh??
Yer a bit late wi' that, pal!
Feckin' aftertimer!
Yer a bit late wi' that, pal!
Feckin' aftertimer!
Not at all. The air-heads sort of convinced the air-heads. How is that my fault? I did the hard yards - eventually - iron logic.
It's all YOUR fault Bodil that I couldn't continue the story about the gangsters in Devon & Exeter - the hit-woman was tied to an Ikea chair and all sorts of explosive things were about to occur -- INSTEAD, I am typing sh1t about poached egg utensils and cheap chocolate...you are a fooking DISGRACE!
Exactly -- the Tiverton Mastiff is extremely depressed.
http://the-mastiff-by-marcel-wynants.com/onewebstatic/f3acd9b5b1-7post26.jpg
Some say life will beat you down, and break your heart, steal your crown ...
Don't make me hate you, btf. Matters of life and death are being sorted here.
Sorry bodil, fell alseep there, I promise to keep up sobriety allowing, , no malice, just a bit of fun, I'm away a good night and good luck all.
All in all.. 7/10. Would have been marked down without my efforts on it 
... mutter ... It really was life and death this end.
I can do this. As will most of you eventually. Sleep well all.
I can do this. As will most of you eventually. Sleep well all.
Another time Bonnie Tyler wouldn't get out of the Aegean Sea. Onassis got really angry as he had businessmen to entertain on the boat - at lunchtime, like. He shouted and shouted but Bonnie Tyler ignored him and kept swimming. Eventually, Onassis ordered the servants to move Bonnie Tyler's grand piano out onto the deck.
"Bonnie!" shouted Onassis, "Get out of the water or the piano joins you!"
"Bonnie!" shouted Onassis, "Get out of the water or the piano joins you!"
I really have poached some lyrics, though. Have spread them out on the carpet and will be picking them out at random.I bet even the likes of Bowie never thought of doing something like that. Ya get me?
We didn't start the fire, it was always burning since the world was turning ...
Meanwhile, in Monmouthshire and Brecon Canal, Maria Callas spent five quid buying an assortment of cheap sweets from Arthur Jones the local newsagent.
First line of my certain chart topper is... kill do now joke head gin voter milk foam back more does
Bowie was only copying - APE-ing - the Dadaists of yore, who did that WAY WAY back.
I woke up this morning, got myself a gun ...
Who can blame me with you lot?
Who can blame me with you lot?
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cut-up_technique
CUT-UP technique...mentions Dada...Bowie...Radiohead...
CUT-UP technique...mentions Dada...Bowie...Radiohead...
Look what they've done to my song, ma
Look what they've done to my song
Well it's the only thing that I could do half right
And it's turning out all wrong, ma
Look what they've done to my song!
ARTHUR JONES, Monmouthshire and Brecon Canal Song Society.
Look what they've done to my song
Well it's the only thing that I could do half right
And it's turning out all wrong, ma
Look what they've done to my song!
ARTHUR JONES, Monmouthshire and Brecon Canal Song Society.
Bonnie Tyler got out of the water in double-quick time.
Onassis just laughed.
Onassis just laughed.
I believe that some girl was aloud(sic) to get to No 1 with such nonsense as this..
Baby I don't own a pistol
My tongue wagging when you wiggle
I'll end up kissing you with or without the mistle
Love the open toes and the clothes
Even though we ain't official
Baby I don't own a pistol
My tongue wagging when you wiggle
I'll end up kissing you with or without the mistle
Love the open toes and the clothes
Even though we ain't official
Meanwhile, in a pub in the East End of London, Chas & Dave felt their fingers SURGE WITH POWER as they approached the old ivories...
Rabbit! RABBIT! Rabbitrabbitrabbit-- Rabbitrabbitrabbit - feckin' SAINSBURY'S!!
Night all
Got to ask yourself a question - where are you now? Where are you now?
Look who's alone now - it's not me. It's not me.
Look who's alone now - it's not me. It's not me.
Nightal...
Then Chas and Dave broke wind simultaneously because of the cheese sandwiches and Guinness...
Then Chas and Dave broke wind simultaneously because of the cheese sandwiches and Guinness...
Hare is one final image : Bonnie Tyler, as she is NOW, riding naked except for a pair of green wellies and Marigold gloves, across the Newmarket heath, on a disturbed 14-year son of Charnwood Forest...
You would pay good money to see that, wouldn't you?
7.30 am tomorrow -- be there -- pay da man. No cameras or mobile phones allowed.
7.30 am tomorrow -- be there -- pay da man. No cameras or mobile phones allowed.
Ha!
Have you ever lived in a film which no one has ever written a script to, Vel and Bodil?
It's pretty fantastic -and I love every bizarre, nonsensical minute of it.
However, I've been semi-poached tonight by a taxi driver. At least it keeps the options open!
Have you ever lived in a film which no one has ever written a script to, Vel and Bodil?
It's pretty fantastic -and I love every bizarre, nonsensical minute of it.
However, I've been semi-poached tonight by a taxi driver. At least it keeps the options open!
Good night Tommy - I have to be up early tomorrow as Craig Whyte (Mexican bandit) is up before the JUDGE tomorrow at Glasgow Sheriff Court --
They have finally CAPTURED him...
They have finally CAPTURED him...
Must just add: I'm surprised by the pair of you having anything to do with the malicious crags cretins.
Wrong, wrong, wrong.
Sick in the head pair of freaks (the crags).
You really both know far better than that.
Wrong, wrong, wrong.
Sick in the head pair of freaks (the crags).
You really both know far better than that.
Hey Toes - good to hear from you. I'm going through something I recall you doing years ago.
Hey Bodil.
I hope it's something good. If not: Bear up - and I wish you all the best.
I hope it's something good. If not: Bear up - and I wish you all the best.
He did a MISSION to destroy the Rangers 
but now - like Zapata - or even Zappa - he must pay the price......yes, the price of lack of freedom......and incarceration...across da nation...
but now - like Zapata - or even Zappa - he must pay the price......yes, the price of lack of freedom......and incarceration...across da nation...
Commiserations then Bodil.
Life can be such a ratbag at times.
Life can be such a ratbag at times.
Run my heroic one - run! 
Leap on the horse of Bonnie Tyler, that swift black son of Charnwood Forest! Hold on...gallop into the night!-- as you grasp the bouncing breasts of bonny Bonnie! 
Freeeedommmm!
Leap on the horse of Bonnie Tyler, that swift black son of Charnwood Forest! Hold on...gallop into the night!-- as you grasp the bouncing breasts of bonny Bonnie! Freeeedommmm!
We all know that isn't how it works. But we would kill to escape it. Count me in - eventually.
Good luck in court Vel!
I'm always in - for everything - Bodil!
I'm always in - for everything - Bodil!
It's my mother, tt. In hospital (ironically a wonderfully functioning institution despite owing many millons via PPI.
Killing them all regardless is surely right?
Killing them all regardless is surely right?
So sorry to learn that, Bodil.
I really wish you all the best.
I really wish you all the best.
She was great,then she was fine.
At 95 you have limited opportunities. But age hooks them, eventually. Then erases them. And then there's nothing.
At 95 you have limited opportunities. But age hooks them, eventually. Then erases them. And then there's nothing.
She is still fighting. As will I, as will you. We will not let them have easy victories.
Hmmm.
Well, it ain't getting me yet.
I've got 18 years to make up - and by Christ, how I'm doing so at the moment!
Well, it ain't getting me yet.
I've got 18 years to make up - and by Christ, how I'm doing so at the moment!
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