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Ampleforth
16 Oct 14 12:28
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Date Joined: 06 Jan 12
| Topic/replies: 1,151 | Blogger: Ampleforth's blog
Whats next?  I can't take any more!!! Cry

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Replies: 40
By:
Mr Eboue
When: 16 Oct 14 12:31
Christmas music in shops will be the end for me.

Shotgun to the face. Screw you all.
By:
Ampleforth
When: 16 Oct 14 12:39
FFS, forgot about Xmas, dont think I can take everyone being happy oblivious to the fact that the end in nigh Cry
By:
call me a taxi
When: 16 Oct 14 12:39
Diane Abbott gets voted slimmer of the year

Somebody turns off all the lights while Nick Clegg is waffling on live TV at the Lib-Dem conference, but nobody notices as they're all asleep.

Cameron gets wrestled to the ground by a suicide bomber, he shouts 'We're all in this together!!', the crowd respond with 'Are we bollocks' and run for it.

Somebody in the audience shouts at Dimbleby on Question Time 'Shut your facking gob you BBC lackey, you're supposed to be impartial.'
By:
Ampleforth
When: 16 Oct 14 12:48
Come to think about it, when was the last time there was anything on the news that wasn't about war, disease, financial hardship, Rape, murder sex cases.. the last thing I can think of Kate and Wills sprog.....  these really are depressing times... and what makes it worse, the only candidates about to sort things out is Milliband and Farage....
By:
xmoneyx
When: 16 Oct 14 12:59
the end of the world is nigh
By:
tictacman1
When: 16 Oct 14 13:09
Share prices across Europe tumbled on Thursday amid fears of a global economic slowdown and the impact of the Ebola crisis.

The main stock markets in the UK, Germany and France fell more than 2%, tracking a sell-off in Asia and on Wall Street.

On Wednesday, London's FTSE 100 saw its heaviest one-day fall in 16 months.

Borrowing costs for Greece and Italy rose, and investors looking for a safe haven pushed the gold price higher.

Analysts said that a raft of disappointing economic and corporate news had unnerved investors.

Recent poor data from China, Germany and the US have heightened worries that global economic recovery could go into reverse.

And concerns about the spread of Ebola and its impact on emerging markets have added to the worries. Companies linked to travel and tourism have seen their share prices fall in the past couple of weeks, offsetting hopes that the recent fall in the oil price would lower their long-term fuel costs.


The price of US crude has gone below $80 a barrel for the first time since June 2012, pulling down oil-related shares such as BP and Tullow.

"It's beginning to feel a bit like a perfect storm," said Joe Rundle, head of trading at ETX Capital Market.

"You have the US Federal Reserve stopping printing money this month, deflation all over the place, oil coming down causing more deflation.

"Everyone is panicking to a certain extent and everything is on the downside, there is real momentum here and there's a lot of money changing hands," he said.

Capital Spreads dealer Jonathan Sudaria said the global economic situation did not warrant such a heavy share sell-off. But he said: "Add a potentially disastrous [Ebola] virus into the mix and the result is what we have here - pandemonium in the market place."


That man could be right...you will only need 2 things soon....Gold and a Gun !

keep smilingScared
By:
Mikael D'Haguenet
When: 16 Oct 14 13:13
Didn't David Icke predict all this on Wogan?
By:
HH Sultan Vinegar
When: 16 Oct 14 14:31
it's always darkest before the dawn Happy
By:
Facts
When: 16 Oct 14 14:49
Mikael D'Haguenet     16 Oct 14 13:13 
Didn't David Icke predict all this on Wogan?


Yeh but he's a nut job Laugh
By:
screaming from beneaththewaves
When: 16 Oct 14 14:58
Gold is the first thing which gets sold off when people are going broke. And if things get really desperate, governments confiscate whatever's left and make private sales illegal.

And I wouldn't trust myself to hit a barn door with a gun.

A garden and a large axe are the way to go for me. With those two I'd fancy my chances over anyone relying on gold and a gun.
By:
Ampleforth
When: 16 Oct 14 15:05
Shotguns are handy against zombies, however, exploding the head of an ebola victim at close range is a bad idea...  Its time to dig in, I'm off to tescos tonight to load up non perishable food....
By:
HH Sultan Vinegar
When: 16 Oct 14 15:13
there is a variety of adversaries for sure. I'm planning for the ultimate - a drug crazed ISIS rapist with an Ebola pit bull.
By:
screaming from beneaththewaves
When: 16 Oct 14 15:18

HH Sultan Vinegar yesterday
By:
HH Sultan Vinegar
When: 16 Oct 14 15:20
yep Sad
By:
HH Sultan Vinegar
When: 16 Oct 14 15:22
here's what I think the end of the world will really look like though...

By:
guinness2dear
When: 16 Oct 14 15:27
That's a normal Saturday at Analfield..
By:
HH Sultan Vinegar
When: 16 Oct 14 15:31
or

By:
guinness2dear
When: 16 Oct 14 15:40
Olaf and the Norwegian horde..
By:
brendanuk1
When: 16 Oct 14 16:10
where is this crash then Confused
By:
screaming from beneaththewaves
When: 16 Oct 14 16:20
By:
Ampleforth
When: 16 Oct 14 16:43
Ok, I have made List of what I need to survive a year in my house without leaving and the costs involved, I have presumed that the water supply and electricity supply will eventually breakdown once the pandemic takes hold....... Whats else may I need before I send the order off to ocado?

£700 ~ 365 tins of all day breakfast in a tin
£219 ~ 550 Litres of Mineral Water
£130 ~ 52 Fray Bentos Pies
£117 ~ 260 Tins of potatoes
£52 ~ 130 Tins of Peas
£23 ~ 52 Tins of Spaghetti hoops
£83 ~ 208 Tins of mixed Vegetables
£52 ~ 52 Tins of  Strawberries
£102 ~ 204 Tins Heinz Soup
£93 ~ 100 Tins Tuna
£129 ~ 50 bags mixed nuts/dried fruit
£121 ~ 700 Cerial Bars
£200 ~ 180 Litres UHT Milk
£180 ~ 180 Litres Aplle/Orange Juice
£120 ~ 52 misc boxes of Cereals
£125 ~ 52 rolls toilet paper.
£150 ~ 200 Litres of bleach
£15 ~ Wind up Torch
£25 ~ Wind up Radio
£50 ~ 25 Rolls of duct tape

£2900 ~ 365 packs of Ciggies
£1950 ~ 2920 bottles of beer


Running Total = £7486.00
By:
Ampleforth
When: 16 Oct 14 16:46
Joined: 12 Jan 02 | Topic/replies: 26,514 | Blogger: brendanuk1's blog

where is this crash then


you got here just in time, its on Monday, things going capput this weekend, Monday will be carnage... make preparations now, best of luck brother...
By:
tictacman1
When: 16 Oct 14 16:56
Laugh ^^^ very good....whats the duck tape for ? no matches/candles ?
By:
Ampleforth
When: 16 Oct 14 17:03
duck tape will be handy for sealing around windows doors etc, also, if my fortress was breached, with the use of other household items I could use the duct tape to concuct a basic ant ebola suit...

Dont need candles, got a wind up torch.. but will need matches for the ciggies!!!  Laugh thanks for the heads up.....
By:
Ampleforth
When: 16 Oct 14 17:07
actually I noticed a miscalulation

180 Litres of milk will never be enough for 52 packets of cereals,,,  I am upping the milk to 360 Litres
By:
call me a taxi
When: 16 Oct 14 17:07
you forgot your crimbo tree
By:
windsor knot
When: 16 Oct 14 17:12
how many copies of razzle ?
By:
call me a taxi
When: 16 Oct 14 17:16
I've stocked up with:

12 shotguns and 5,000 cartridges
12 Heckler & Koch MP5s with 5,000 rounds
a minefield round the house
CCTV on all 4 corners of the house

I'll go out an find my own food, probably by raiding Ampleforth's house.Devil
By:
HH Sultan Vinegar
When: 16 Oct 14 17:26
Ample's list reminds me of a Yank I knew in the sticks in NY state who horded all those things and more (including an M16), in anticipation of a global meltdown due to the Millenium Bug. Plain
By:
call me a taxi
When: 16 Oct 14 17:29
Laugh
By:
Ibrahima Sonko
When: 16 Oct 14 18:49
Couldnt care about the stock market, i would like to see every greedy non tax paying company go to the wall.

But if Ed Miliband became PM i think that would be the final straw, i would probably leave the country.
By:
akabula
When: 16 Oct 14 19:09
I don't care what happens next as long as Dianne Abbott Love is safe.
By:
Mikael D'Haguenet
When: 16 Oct 14 19:23
Ibrahima Sonko     16 Oct 14 18:49 
Couldnt care about the stock market, i would like to see every greedy non tax paying company go to the wall.

But if Ed Miliband became PM i think that would be the final straw, i would probably leave the country.


Reminds me of all those people who said the same thing before the 1997 election. None of the cửnts did though.
By:
Ibrahima Sonko
When: 16 Oct 14 19:24
glad you think so highly of me Mischief
By:
sidthekid
When: 16 Oct 14 19:30
Mikael D'Haguenet     16 Oct 14 13:13 
Didn't David Icke predict all this on Wogan?

Yes,
Unfortunately just about Everything he wrote in his book 30? years ago came True,
But we all said he was a Crazy in his Electric Blue tracksuit.
By:
Mc Moonbeam
When: 16 Oct 14 20:53
I must of slept through it all .. who is Ebola .. and where can I invest in an ISIS Confused
By:
Injera
When: 16 Oct 14 20:59
Hmm, 52 Fray Bentos Pies and 52 Toilet Rolls.

Perfect symmetry Ampleforth Laugh
By:
Foinavon
When: 16 Oct 14 23:29
Ampleforth,

You forgot the tin opener.
By:
Ampleforth
When: 17 Oct 14 09:38
I already have a tin opener in the house, remember I am not going off to live in the woods.. I will be at in my house. However I have to make a couple of additions, Toothpaste for obvious reasons, and sealable food bags for collecting my 'waste' when the water eventually goes off.  Plus I have decided to reduce the beer, I will need to be on full alert at all times.

£700 ~ 365 tins of all day breakfast in a tin
£219 ~ 550 Litres of Mineral Water
£130 ~ 52 Fray Bentos Pies
£117 ~ 260 Tins of potatoes
£52 ~ 130 Tins of Peas
£23 ~ 52 Tins of Spaghetti hoops
£83 ~ 208 Tins of mixed Vegetables
£52 ~ 52 Tins of  Strawberries
£102 ~ 204 Tins Heinz Soup
£93 ~ 100 Tins Tuna
£129 ~ 50 bags mixed nuts/dried fruit
£121 ~ 700 Cerial Bars
£200 ~ 180 Litres UHT Milk
£180 ~ 180 Litres Aplle/Orange Juice
£120 ~ 52 misc boxes of Cereals
£26 ~ 52 rolls toilet paper.
£150 ~ 200 Litres of bleach
£15 ~ Wind up Torch
£25 ~ Wind up Radio
£50 ~ 25 Rolls of duct tape

£2900 ~ 365 packs of Ciggies
£487.5 ~ 730 bottles of beer

£20 ~ 20 Tubes of toothpaste
£80 ~ 400 resealable freezer bags.


Running Total  £6074.50


Running Total = £7486.00
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