When you are in the gents and someone in a cubicle is taking a dump...

Er...that was s n i g g e r.

ladies loudest

... depends if I'm in a cubicle in the gents or in the ladies.

I'm a bit more concerned about those people who come out of a cubicle and walk straight out without washing their hands.I see this often.

Visit Public toilets often Rog ?

I brace myself for the smell and get out as quickly as possible.

I dare say Lady Sybil would get turned on by it.

I have to wait until the whole toilet is empty, if someone is next to me I will wait till they are away ... sometimes Ive seen myself sitting in one for 30 minutes waiting on the place to have no people in it

iamajambo • September 4, 2014 1:18 PM BST
I'm a bit more concerned about those people who come out of a cubicle and walk straight out without washing their hands.I see this often.Cry

I was just going to post the same, often this is in Morrisons. I noticed one chap who did this, then pick up a shopping basket and head for the fruit and veg section, where he proceeded to examine the pairs for firmness ffs.

I like a nice firm pair.

A relevant joke ...
Man goes in cubicle and prepares himself for a number 2.
He then hears voice of guy in next cubicle saying "hi, how are you today?"
Man says, not wishing to be unfriendly, but a bit uncomfortabe "err, o.k. thanks"
Guy says "so, what have you been up to?"
Man says "err, nothing much really"
Guy says "sorry, I'll have to call you back.  There's some tw*t in the next cubicle answering my questions".

I usually soak a few paper towels soak them in cold water and lob them over the door,hoping it hits them on the head and they jump up and sh!t down their leg.
I then wait outside to see if they come out striding away good style or hopefully hirpling along like a wounded crab.

I hate when you go to put the toilet roll back on the holder and then you suddenly realise someone has made a glory hole.

Public toilets how common........

Was in a bistro today at lunchtime. After I dined I went to the loo for a p1ss, discovered there was only a single cubicle which was occupied. I waited and an old guy came out. I went in and, **** me, anything like the stench he left there. There must have been rotting fish in his bowels.

erse did lunch today

If you think the smell is bad in Britain, think about how bad it is in countries such as Germany where shelf toilets are common. The ones where you crap onto a shelf and it sits there in the air steaming and smelling until you flush, not into water that masks it. They can make a room uninhabitable in seconds.

..erse would love them? :)

Is that what they call it, I thought it was a viewing window.

Sep 4, 2014 -- 5:36PM, Just Checking wrote:

If you think the smell is bad in Britain, think about how bad it is in countries such as Germany where shelf toilets are common. The ones where you crap onto a shelf and it sits there in the air steaming and smelling until you flush, not into water that masks it. They can make a room uninhabitable in seconds...erse would love them? :)

they should clarify the rules on this. I got arrested for public indecency after getting confused in the classic literature section of a Berlin bookshop.

I heard a funny toilet story last week. A friend of mine is a salesman. One of his colleagues visited a client at their office. He was busting for a crap but thought he could make it through the meeting. The futility of this battle soon became apparent and he had to excuse himself, and run down the corridor to the nearest toilet. Job done. He was standing wiping his backside (weirdo) and as he threw the soiled paper into the basin he somehow missed. It hit the rim and bouneed under the cubicle next door and the air was pierced with the screams of a woman. In his haste he'd used the ladies by mistake. For some reason he said "sorry" which caused the screams to grow louder, arousing the attention of a security guard. Fortunately he was able to convince the guard of his mistake and go back to the meeting, where nothing was said.

Class Barry!

I once worked for a huge multi-national and one day I had terrible toothache. One of the girls in the office gave me some Olbas Oil and suggested that I rub it on. For reasons lost to me now, I decided to do this in the gents. Job done I walked out of the door and quite taken with the smell of my finger that I had used for the task, was having a good sniff at it..... just as the head of UK sales, a woman, was rounding the bend. The look of horror on her face was epic, I started into a stuttering explanation, but before I had gone any further than, "no, no ,nooooo...", she had literally run away back from whence she came.

Within months I was made redundant, I like to think the two incidents are unconnected as my whole dept got the boot, but..........

"He was standing wiping his backside (weirdo)"

I always used to stand to wipe but I've been experimenting with some success with a sit down technique.

I didn't realise standing was considered so strange? !