How many keys on your ring?

If you are then how do I find the key to your heart

Thinly veiled 'I have a job and own a bike' thread?

Don't forget his windows too Roger...the fecking show off.

1. * key ring  (for a start)

2. Thinly veiled, "I don't own a car"

3. Unknown key = Basement dungeon or wife's chastity belt

Come on guys, open up your keyrings for Chit-Chat scrutiny, my database isn't going to fill itself.

car key
front door key
back door key
key to sister's house
key to padlock for back gate
tesco club card key fob
blood donors info fob
I ♥ Nigel Farage Keyring

good thread

HH get rid of that Tesco club card fob......man up !

2 irrational dislikes in life

a) Attired men, who drape undone bow-ties around their neck, for that sophisticated, end of the evening look
b) People who carry  weighty bunches of keyrings around, burdened with dozens of pointless keys.

One doorkey for me, attached to a light, rounded keyring.
(Car key is a card, which is annoying, because I can't attach the two together,
meaning I occasionaly forget the doorkey, to get back in, if the house is empty)

All other keys - back door, conservatory, shed, bike etc. have their own keyrings and only come out when necessary

What's the point of carrying a monolithic bunch of metal around everywhere?
Plus, I loathe blokes who undo their bow-ties

Nothing irrational about number 1 imo.

Car keys are electronic blobbins that live in a pot on the microwave

There's another key-ring I'd forgotten about so I'll detail it here:

Shed keyring:

1 x shed key
1 x massive solid diamond

People often forget to have a little name and address tag on their key-rings. It saves so much hassle in the case of loss.

^^^But make sure it is not your name and address ....oc !

I have just checked in the mirror and there are no keys on my ring ... does this mean I am special?

Only one shed Ken?

dear oh dear.

Car key,
two front door keys
key to the safe where I keep all my dosh

2 x sheds, one for bikes only and one large one for general shedware. A man should have many sheds.

Excellent Ken,, I have two sheds at home and one on my allotment.

There's also a garage that's not wide enough for the car and is, to all intents and purposes, a rather well-appointed shed, if that counts. Well, it's wide enough for the car but you'd have to climb out through the back door if you wanted to park in there.

It's all give and no take, this thread, isn't it.

Another pet hate for poppydog - What about that certain kind of man (and it's always a man) who has his keys in his pocket attached to a long chain which is, in turn, attached to a belt loop? Death by ferrets for them, imo.

Man I play golf with occasionally has his tee peg attached to a bunch of keys with a piece of string (honest), so that when he plays his shot, his tee peg doesn't go flying and get lost.
I know a tee peg's not a key, but I thought forumites would find this both novel and interesting.
But perhaps not.

I found that both novel and interesting, I thought you would like to know.

Genuinely, what's a tee peg - is it just an ordinary golf tee

Furthermore, does the string not interfere with his swing?

Acrylic tag with paper insert
"car and house keys" one side
"name name" and "e-mail@eircom.net" other side

Front door mortice lock key
Front door mortice lock key
Front door Yale lock key
Car key

No address on the tag for obvious reasons.
Two mortice locks on the front door.
A plastic box of other keys/spares under the car passenger seat.

Tee peg is the thing you put your ball on before you hit/miss it (the tee is the big green thing covered in grass where you stand to hit the ball).
He takes the keys out of his pocket and places them near the tee peg before he strikes the ball.  If you think about it, if he kept his keys in his pocket with the string attached to the tee peg, when he plays his shot he would probably send his trousers down the fairway as well as the ball.
Some people say golf is boring, but not where I play.

Yale key - front door
Mortice key - front door
Union key - back door
Yale key - side door
Rented out flat - 2 keys
Brothers house - 2 keys
Office - 2 keys
Car - 1 key
Bottle opener x 1

My keyring:
1 x front door key
2 x car keys
(my car and wifes car, wife doesn't have a spare key to my car) 

Back door key stays in the lock 24/7
All window keys stay in the locks 24/7
Patio door keys stay in the locks 24/7

All the other keys hang up in the kitchen
2 x side door
1 x padlock to shed
1 x key to meter cupboard outside
1 x key to mother-in-laws house
1 x key to sister-in-laws house
1 x key to next doors house
1 x key to house over the road
1 x key to safe (that has fack all in it)
1 x Komatsu fork lift truck key
And about 8 keys I have no idea about

Bike D-lock key
Back-door key
Garage door key
Porch key
Key to padlock on garage side door
Letterbox key
Side-entrance gate key

Like Ken I would keep my car keys on top of the microwave if I owned a car. Or a microwave.
I would also like to have a key to the shed door, but equally the shed would like to have a door that closes.

My sheds don't have locks either on the basis that the shed is worth more than the contents and I don't want it trashed by thieves trying to get in.
I've seen people with keys attached to a little chain and also with a little holster on the belt for their phone. What are they trying to say about themselves?

that tee peg keyring is a good idea. I might try marketing a gardeners key ring with a spade and/or fork.

I'd like one with a wheelbarrow H.H. Not too expensive mind.

Seriously, am I the only person with a bottle opener on their key ring? I thought it was in the rules.

I don't have any keys.

BTW why do you need to carry a shed key or more than one key to your house? Why not have then at home?

OK, get ready for a veil. A thin one.

Town house front door key.
Town house flat key.
Country house key.
2 padlock keys for the gym.
Key to my little safe box which contains all manner of delightful things.

cracking fred this!

erm...3 keys and a tiny usb memory card thingy. for all my important files, in case i gt burgled.
trouble is, i havent backed up those files onto the card for about 3 years so its pretty pointless.

call me a taxi wrote:

My keyring:
1 x front door key
2 x car keys
(my car and wifes car, wife doesn't have a spare key to my car)

Back door key stays in the lock 24/7
All window keys stay in the locks 24/7
Patio door keys stay in the locks 24/7

All the other keys hang up in the kitchen
2 x side door
1 x padlock to shed
1 x key to meter cupboard outside
1 x key to mother-in-laws house
1 x key to sister-in-laws house
1 x key to next doors house
1 x key to house over the road
1 x key to safe (that has fack all in it)
1 x Komatsu fork lift truck key
And about 8 keys I have no idea about

saves them torturing you for the combo!

He could lend them the fork-lift truck, to just take it away

spellingandgrammarchecker
Seriously, am I the only person with a bottle opener on their key ring? I thought it was in the rules.

A man should be able to take off the cap of a beer bottle without a bottle opener.

Check here
http://www.urlesque.com/2010/09/20/open-beer-bottle-without-bottle-opener/
I use a bottle of beer as a bottle opener.

Foinavon
I'd like one with a wheelbarrow H.H. Not too expensive mind.

Great idea - might also be a market on building sites for that.

Don't think so, Sultan. It would cause your trousers to fall down from your waist, and no builder likes that.

true