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I think the forum needs this kind of thread, non-gambling related bragging only please as we (unfortunately) have plenty of after-timing gambling winning threads
I will start with the fact that I got a hole in one at golf last week at the 12th on my local Course, my first ever.
I will start with the fact that I got a hole in one at golf last week at the 12th on my local Course, my first ever.
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I've written a lion romantic comedy in Spanish and it's got a poem in it.
I've sang with Robbie Williams and Liam Gallagher, live, in front of a crowd.
Can I just quickly do a bit of 'oneupmanship' on Tommy and mention I've actually met and had my photo taken with Peppa Pig?
All at regular prices, kenny, other than the 2 remaining Peppa Pigs (which were half price when I bought the box of 6).
And Tommy, your name didn't come up at all. She's clearly NEVER even heard of you
Tommy my friend, a fat lot of good your crazed Peppa Pig ice lolly buying did you eh? You won't ingratiate yourself with the gentle but doomed Pig with those antics.
If I were you, I'd take them back ASAP and ask to exchange them for a few half-decent Jubblies.
If I were you, I'd take them back ASAP and ask to exchange them for a few half-decent Jubblies.
Nah, I'll stick with the Piggy wiggies, Alun. They're strawberry ice cream and just enough when you just want a smidgeon of ice cream - especially strawberry flavoured ice cream.
They're actually in the shape of Peppa Pig too - which is a bit of a novelty!
They're actually in the shape of Peppa Pig too - which is a bit of a novelty!
mmmmm, they sound lovely TT. I'll phone her later and ask for a box to be sent to me 'on approval', although I imagine she'll just issue some high-powered instruction to some lackey to get them to me ASAP by Fedex. For God's sake I'm not the sort of man who can be expected to traipse out to Mr Patel's mini-market to buy ice lollies.
slippy ,I done the same its a hard hole the 4th at bognor crazy golf 
As for big the fact that is a 9 hole golf course has been omitted imo
I did actually hit a hole in one on a 70 yd pitch an putt hole ,reloaded and then
hit another ball to within 1 foot
we all thought it had gone in
As for big the fact that is a 9 hole golf course has been omitted imo
I did actually hit a hole in one on a 70 yd pitch an putt hole ,reloaded and then
hit another ball to within 1 foot
we all thought it had gone in
I've met and chatted with Pele
end of thread- no one can top that
end of thread- no one can top that
I batted with Sunil Gavavskar, he ran me out for nought much to the amusement of my team mates.
I rode a Derby winner, .................I was Lesters cell mate.
If I can mix my sports I must confess that as Big Issue and Slippy were scoring their holes in one I was riding their popsy's and also potting the brown.
I don't know if it can be classed as a brag but when at Uni I gave a speech as president of the law society and I had The Director Of Public Prosecutions sat next to me on the left (lovely lady) and the top Law Lord in the country on my right (miserable cnunt) and I was absolutely shiit faced.
no offence but thats sounds unbelievably boring eternaloptomist
But in my defence it was followed by a night of debauchery in which I played cards with a couple of honeys and then played a few other games. 
I once had David Bairstow (Johnny's father and future Yorkshire and England wicket-keeper) caught on the boundary in a school house game. He was younger than me but elevated as he was so good.
I once got three bj's in my bedroom in four days from 3 different women I knew
My sister was on stage with Ernie Wise when he was a young comedian. She was in the dancing troupe.
My brother in laws brother opened the bowling with Freddie Trueman for Yorkshire in the late 50's. His scalps included Doug Insole and Trevor Bailey.
I once dressed up as 3 different women and gave this bloke 3 bj's in his bedroom, he never had a clue
I was the most unluckiest hooker to not get capped by England.
I was the first person Kenny mann spoke to on here.
I was the first person Kenny mann spoke to on here.
I was alighting the train at Leeds City Station rushing to get the York connection. In my haste I almost sent Peter Bowles flyling. No mean feet as he's about 6-4. Sorry I shouted. Np problem, he retorted.
I once scuttled a bird who was so heavy that when she hefted her leg over me to stop me escaping I really couldn't escape.
If I ever move to Brasford I'm going to use Kenny mann as a reference
Bradford even. Not that I even know where that place is of course.
I can picture it now ..
Slippy Blue .. Most unluckiest hooker in Brasford
Slippy Blue .. Most unluckiest hooker in Brasford
Bradford's great, check this out. Superb speeded up footage. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vTYNp3C0iu4
I drove through Bradford once. It made Neasden look like Beverley Hills.
just went onto google maps street view to see what bradford is actually like, dragged the yellow man on the map and it went blank for 10 seconds, almost like even it didnt want to go there took me to godwin/sunbridge road where the first thing i see is two estate agents and a thomas cook as well as one closed down shop, looks like the only businesses up there are the ones offering a way out
took me to godwin/sunbridge road where the first thing i see is two estate agents and a thomas cook as well as one closed down shop, looks like the only businesses up there are the ones offering a way out
Being as it's your birthday , but i made myself LOL
Kenny, HRH has been one of the best forum contributors in the last decade on here, that was harsh and very unjustified, for me.
Yeah top guy HRH
only kidding you know that Slippy
only kidding you know that Slippy
well if he'd checked the link I provided he'd have noticed that Bradford isn't quite like that now, but he chose to ignore it and make a smart asred comment.
well if you travel 4 miles or more in any direction it's fantastic. The City Centre has far too many nationalities. Most of the decent people have moved to the outskirts. A lot can't afford it of course, sadly.
I think Ilkley (Bradford postcode) is the 3rd most sought after place in the UK.
Punched the Duke of Cambridge in the crown jewels and got away with it.
Kenny, that's quite cool, and I'm guessing central. No idea of the exact parts we drove through, as I was a passenger, but going from north of Leeds towards Manchester, but there was a stretch that was an absolute hole - Sentiments echoed by a few of the natives. Of course many places have their rough parts, but this was grim.
Thank you, sorry for being rude, I was going to apologise tomorrow.
In that case, I suppose I better release this cat I've just taken hostage then 
in all seriousness i know nothing about bradford other than reputation and its reputation is very bad, but tbh i would be massilvey surprised if bradford had one of the top 3 sought after postcodes, i mean some of the places in certan parts of london and surrey are the most expensive in the country,
Bradford itself isn't Ayers, but I can assure you that Ilkley is one of the most sought after. Travel just a few miles outside of Bradford and it is very exclusive.
£830,000
3 bedroom detached bungalow for sale Panorama Drive, Ilkley, West Yorkshire
Set amidst impressive landscaped grounds with outstanding views across the Wharfe Valley, this very spacious detached bungalow provides a splendid layout of well appointed accommodation positioned within a highly sought after location, only moments from Ilkley Moor.
3 bedroom detached bungalow for sale Panorama Drive, Ilkley, West Yorkshire
Set amidst impressive landscaped grounds with outstanding views across the Wharfe Valley, this very spacious detached bungalow provides a splendid layout of well appointed accommodation positioned within a highly sought after location, only moments from Ilkley Moor.
I met a girl from Bradford at the weekend. Quite a good lass, but a bit of a minger - (not bragging, an addendum to earlier posts).
The Queen shook my hand in 1983 and thanked me for my service to OUR country whilst attaching a medal to my jacket. Enough said.
Apart from that, once got Perrie Mans autograph at Pot Black in 1977? and bumped into Lawrence Llewellyn Bowen in Cavendish House (House of Frasier)in Cheltenham about 6 years ago. We were both looking at TVs. I went for the 36" Panasonic. Needless to say he went for the 60" Sony!
Still rate my chat with HM our Queen the highlight though!
Apart from that, once got Perrie Mans autograph at Pot Black in 1977? and bumped into Lawrence Llewellyn Bowen in Cavendish House (House of Frasier)in Cheltenham about 6 years ago. We were both looking at TVs. I went for the 36" Panasonic. Needless to say he went for the 60" Sony!
Still rate my chat with HM our Queen the highlight though!
Not a clue Kenny. We went to the same university at about the same time, and knew some of the same people, so we spent no time talking about where we were originally from.
In keeping with Joel's theme, I've put one more past Gordon Banks than Pele did.
It was either 1990 or 1991 (I played from 1987 to 1996) in our own team competition, I won my first 12 single matches in the East London Darts League, and if my last dart hadn't hit the wire on double 8 and ended up on the floor, it would have have been 13. My team mate Brian was unlucky, we were both on 12 wins, but he had to play after me, and he also lost.
The last time I played snooker - last Wednesday - in five consecutive frames I made a 95,89,59,55,117.
"£830,000
3 bedroom detached bungalow for sale Panorama Drive, Ilkley, West Yorkshire
Set amidst impressive landscaped grounds with outstanding views across the Wharfe Valley, this very spacious detached bungalow provides a splendid layout of well appointed accommodation positioned within a highly sought after location, only moments from Ilkley Moor."
Can you put the link on, please, Kenny? I want to see it, it sounds lovely!
We could start chit-chat's very own Escape to the Country
3 bedroom detached bungalow for sale Panorama Drive, Ilkley, West Yorkshire
Set amidst impressive landscaped grounds with outstanding views across the Wharfe Valley, this very spacious detached bungalow provides a splendid layout of well appointed accommodation positioned within a highly sought after location, only moments from Ilkley Moor."
Can you put the link on, please, Kenny? I want to see it, it sounds lovely!
We could start chit-chat's very own Escape to the Country
will do later today, it's awaiting approval. Must dash, taking a chick out for a spot of lunch.
kenny
in south kensingston 830 grand wouldn't buy you a decent front gate
in south kensingston 830 grand wouldn't buy you a decent front gate
ffs, think how many cats you could rescue for that sort of money.
You'll agree that Ilkley is nicer than Kensington when you see the photo.
Think of all the songbirds you'd save if you paid someone that money to drown all the cats they could find.
Looks nice but is there a dog track and a casino nearby?
Thanks, Kenny. It looks lovely.
Not wanting to appear ungrateful I was hoping for a link to the estate agent so I could have a look inside
Not wanting to appear ungrateful I was hoping for a link to the estate agent so I could have a look inside
http://www.rightmove.co.uk/property-for-sale/property-38182768.html
It is grim, and overpriced, check back on nethousprices in a couple of years and it'll have gone for 650-700k imo.
I see they have a mini Narnia lamp post in the garden
Going inside for a look.
Will report back.
Going inside for a look.
Will report back.
The kitchen is lovely, the bathroom's quite nice.
The rest just needs updating cosmetically.
The sitting room carpet and curtains would be the first things to go
It looks to be in a fantastic location.
I think that must be a very expensive part of the world to live.
The rest just needs updating cosmetically.
The sitting room carpet and curtains would be the first things to go
It looks to be in a fantastic location.
I think that must be a very expensive part of the world to live.
Took 4 wickets for 6 runs one season.
Sounds impressive as an average, but I was only wheeled out for the tail enders of the really bad teams.
Used to get it to turn quite well, but with the pace of a sloth. We stuck a guy who was really fast but wildly inaccurate at the other end. With our combined efforts it was usually just a matter of plugging away until we actually hit the wicket.
Seemed to work, but would have been smacked out of the ground by anyone who could actually bat.
Sounds impressive as an average, but I was only wheeled out for the tail enders of the really bad teams.
Used to get it to turn quite well, but with the pace of a sloth. We stuck a guy who was really fast but wildly inaccurate at the other end. With our combined efforts it was usually just a matter of plugging away until we actually hit the wicket.
Seemed to work, but would have been smacked out of the ground by anyone who could actually bat.
I've just had my first season bowling spin instead of seam, hm. Should have done it years ago. In my younger days I could turn it miles, without being able to say within a square kilometer where it was gonna land. Now I know where it's going, the old fingers ain't so supple, so not as much spin, but generally much more enjoyable, much less tiring and less damaging to the left knee. I'm a bit sick the season has ended.
I never really fell in love with cricket like I did many sports, I just got thoroughly bored with fielding. Bowling fine, batting fine, but standing in the middle of a field doing fa bored me to tears. Pretty rubbish at actually throwing too, which didn't help.
Fielding sucks, that's a fact.
Still my favourite team sport though, perhaps because it is really just a succession of individual battles in a team setting. All the sports I'm actually good at are all individual sports.
Still my favourite team sport though, perhaps because it is really just a succession of individual battles in a team setting. All the sports I'm actually good at are all individual sports.
I guess it's time to ressurect this thread, as yesterday I got another Hole-in-One. The same hole as last time, the 12th on my course. A nice steady wedge with a little draw, pin just tucked behind the bunker on right, one bounce and in. Okay it's stroke index 18 and only 122 yards but still made me happy though as it was the Sunday Morning Fiddle, I had to purchase a bottle of whiskey from the Bar.
I achieved the maximum score on an original pacman machine in the early eighties. I believe that I might have been the first person to make it, even though Wikipedia has it down to some American chap called Billy Mitchell.
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