Advice please

Whos names on the mortgage

Both

offer her a sweetner couple of grand cash to sell at the price the house is worth at the mo



Get a builder m8 to put in a big repair estimate,roof and trusses,damp,subsidence etc tell shes got to pay half that might make her get rid quicker

Ok cheers 11kv thought of all that kind of stuff, just wanted to know if legally I have the right to buy her out as it was her that left, but the answer is obviously no then?

Fink its a sell it split the money.........................explain to her after costs she gets a lot less.........PROVE that your paying it ALL NOW if she aint.............no 50/50 now...............Y aint married

She has been paying all the time since she left, which made me think she would come back sooner or later. (like a mug!)

Now I know she isn't coming back I just want to get her out of my life completely, and this will be the last thing.

Had the same situation mate about a year ago.........proper rubbish because it adds to an already bad time in your life...... but enough of all that gay emotional stuff.

Bottom line is you have to put your feelings aside and play dirty. She has no legal right to sell but if she isnt paying her half of the upkeep then you can take action against her. Is she still paying half the mortgage?

You need to make it as expensive as possible for her to keep the house so she starts thinking its not worth it.........dont have any feelings of wanting to be nice to her still..........it will get you nowhere.

Then do what i did.....get out, enjoy the single life for a bit and get stuck into as much flange as is possible!

Yeah Jimmy she is and always has paid half of the mortgage.

I think what I'll do is tell her I'm going to build an extension and have some other work done and she'll have to pay half and see how she reacts. The extension is something I have always thought about anyway so she knows I'm not just making it up.

It's hard to be horrible to her as there is still part of me saying don't blow it completely, she might still come back. But it's getting me nowhere, (apart from an insomniac), so it's time to man up!

Thanks for the replies on this.
Cheers.

Regardless of whether your relationship is over or not, the aim in life should always be to make the best out of any given situation. So here's my advice, You are already living in the house alone and only paying 50% of the mortgage.

All you now have to do is find a lodger to share, charge him/her the other 50% of the mortgage, this way you live mortgage/rent free.

Remember there are lots of girls on the high street but very few rent free houses.

It's hard to be horrible to her as there is still part of me saying don't blow it completely, she might still come back. But it's getting me nowhere, (apart from an insomniac), so it's time to man up!

This is a girl who cheated on you and went off with someone else, how could you possibly ever want her back? Get those stupid thoughts out of your head.
You're not being horrible, you just want to move on and you should do what you have to.  Good luck

If she's being a bitch and digging her heels in for the sake of it just to take one final bite out of you, call her bluff and say you flogging your half to a local villain and she can from here on in deal with him!

Nocash 25 Sep 12 08:01
Regardless of whether your relationship is over or not, the aim in life should always be to make the best out of any given situation. So here's my advice, You are already living in the house alone and only paying 50% of the mortgage.

All you now have to do is find a lodger to share, charge him/her the other 50% of the mortgage, this way you live mortgage/rent free.

...is the correct answer. You cannot get rid of the house without her approval. As she is already paying half of the costs, you are actually doing quite well currently (she could easily be a complete cow and refuse to contribute anything whilst also refusing to sell, leaving you stuck in limbo). Get a lodger to cover your half of costs and live cost free. Put the amount you would have paid towards the house each month into a savings account so when she finally sees sense you not only get your half of the house but you have a decent chunk saved up to add to it for your next place.

Punter h, there's some good advice here. It seems you just cant realise yet that you may have fallen on your feet. In my youth I got so fixated on a girl I acted like a complete mug thinking she would come back....forget her!!!
Good luck!

I would imagine that she would have to approve of the lodger idea. I slso imaginet hat she would be due half of his rent.

The house is probably going to have to go up for sale. Take the loss and both move on. Why do you think that hanging on will be more profitable? If prices rise, then your next house price rises also.

I wouldn't even run the lodger idea past her, I would just get on with it. My guess is that as she has gone off but is still happy to pay her share of everything that she won't kick up a fuss. If she doesn't like the idea of it, she can always either buy his half/sell him her half to end everything. Try it.

There has to be a logical reason why she's still paying half of the mortgage but not living there.

a) Has more money than sense.
b) She may end up moving back in when she has spent the other blokes wonga.
c) She's going to offer to buy you out.

or

a) the property prices are cr@p at the moment and it is not really worth selling for the amount people are willing or you will end up in negative equity with no assets

Yes that is the reason Magic flea which is fair enough.

I'm staying here whatever happens, I have thought about a lodger but it's not really practical with the layout of the house ie you have to walk through each bedroom to get to the end one. Not that I want a lodger anyway tbh.

I also told her I was thinking of renting it but I don't think she believed me, although she didn't seem bothered. I think I can do what I want as long as she keeps her share she's happy.

So as said above it could be worse, it's just all a bit of a brainfrazzler atm.

Thanks again everyone for the input, some helpful advice.
Cheers,
H.

btw i believe if you want to create an extension and she disagrees, as part owner she is under no obligation to pay for it, plus she can stop the planning permission.

Oh right, she wouldn't stop planning permission or be a cow as we still get on and she just isn't like that.

I was halfway fitting a new kitchen (just couldn't be arsed to get on with it) but told her I wasn't doing anything more to the house until I knew what was happening with it. That was at Xmas but she offered to pay half so that's not a problem, or it wasn't then.

Nice idea from Roger
Would make an app with citizen advice to clarify legalities of selling etc though just in case........gl

have you thought about shooting her in the face?

No, but wouldn't think twice about shooting the weasel she fooked off with.

Why the anger at the man who doesn't know you? I never understand this. Surely you would rather shoot your ex in the face?

House layout sounds perfect. Get a hottie as a lodger, you take the end bedroom, then you can justifiably walk through her bedroom pretty much whenever you want.

Only joking Money Chaser, anger is baggage and I'm through that stage.

Roger, I like your thinking and as it happens my bedroom is already the end one.