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Emily Bishop's Gusset
16 Jan 10 22:48
Joined:
Date Joined: 07 Oct 09
| Topic/replies: 177 | Blogger: Emily Bishop's Gusset's blog
Ok here's the story...

As I reckon, I few of us on here have got in trouble on Facebook regarding old girlfriends, school friends etc, and to my shame I am in that position at the moment..The story is quite simple, I've known this girl/women for a few years now ever since we started work together from the age of 18..(this is going back 20 years now!)....It was always the same, I'd want her and she would play hard to get etc,etc, then she would make a play for me and I'd play it cool...Cut a long stort short, eventually she married a work friend of mine, had 2 kids whilst in this time I moved abroad with my girlfriend...

I returned to the UK about one year ago and found out she was on FB and started talking via the chat thingy etc and arranged to see her for a beer....we went for the aforementioned beer, got it on to a certain extent but nothing too sexual and that was that....However, I was seen out in my local City with her and my girlfriend found out and as she knew that I had history with this girl was not too impressed to say the least...After a long talk,I promised not to contact this girl again and delete her from my FB account but being a bit of a love rat I recently went to see this other girl again..

Now, my girlfriend works at a well know supermarket on a saturday and so a week or so ago I drove her to work at 6am and then went to visit this other girl....Problem is this...my car was in for a service and was required to be kept in for a couple of days..I borrowed my father in laws car to take my girlfriend to work and normally I'd come straight home...not this time, and unfo I was flashed by a speed camera in his car about 1mile away from this girls house....he will get the ticket and how do I explain this away...?
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Report thegame • January 16, 2010 10:51 PM GMT
spaff on her chebs
Report punterfleecer • January 16, 2010 10:52 PM GMT
how about, not **ing on yer bird?
Report Emily Bishop's Gusset • January 16, 2010 10:52 PM GMT
haha...I didn't expect anything less...:)
Report Emily Bishop's Gusset • January 16, 2010 10:53 PM GMT
haven't **ed as such
Report punterfleecer • January 16, 2010 10:53 PM GMT
you're better writing to dear dierdrie

however, it's good that you're in this predicament
Report Emily Bishop's Gusset • January 16, 2010 10:54 PM GMT
I find the advice here of more value..
Report punterfleecer • January 16, 2010 10:54 PM GMT
got it on to a certain extent but nothing too sexual

explain that then if its not **ing?
Report club20 • January 16, 2010 10:54 PM GMT
explain to them that you are a **ing b@rstard that is led astray by his c0ck
Report Crisp77 • January 16, 2010 10:54 PM GMT
You couldn't make it up
Report blackjackking • January 16, 2010 10:55 PM GMT
200 posts NAP
Report club20 • January 16, 2010 10:56 PM GMT
oh .. and dont drive like a muppet
Report Emily Bishop's Gusset • January 16, 2010 10:57 PM GMT
I know it looks bad, but I haven't done anything really out of order apart from take this girl for a drink without telling the gf..
Report Jimmy Diamond • January 16, 2010 10:58 PM GMT
does father in law no about other girl?

If not could you not ask him if he'd keep the ticket queit as you feel 'embarrassed' about the whole thing.
Report dustman • January 16, 2010 10:59 PM GMT
put some panties in the glove box.
Report Jimmy Diamond • January 16, 2010 10:59 PM GMT
or think of a good reason you were in the area.
Report DaveEdwards • January 16, 2010 11:01 PM GMT
Nevermind all the negative posts.

You need to think of a close friend or relative who lives past where this woman lives. Male friend/relative would be best as they are more likely to back you up. You were visiting them of course.

It would have been better if you'd come clean about the speed camera early, it would have looked like you had less to hide. You still might have time to do this, I don't know. The key to getting out of this is to keep your story simple. If you try to get too elaborate it will unravel later on.

Alternatively, you were visiting a shop in that direction where you were looking to buy your current woman a gift etc, but this could have difficulties as she may start to think that you feel guilty about soemthing and are trying to cover it up by buying her something.
Report DaveEdwards • January 16, 2010 11:03 PM GMT
And when you are delivering your story, don't fidget at all. Especially touching your neck etc and maintain eye contact with her at all times. If you look away it won't stack up. You have to remain cool on the outside, even if inside you are going through it!
Report Emily Bishop's Gusset • January 16, 2010 11:03 PM GMT
He knows a little yeah, problem is she lives in a village outside my home city which I wouldn't normally go nowhere near...only saving grace that I can think of is that i have a cousin that lives there, but why i would visit him at 6,30 on a saturday morning is anybodys guess..
Report Emily Bishop's Gusset • January 16, 2010 11:04 PM GMT
posted this after Daves post....good advice
Report Crisp77 • January 16, 2010 11:05 PM GMT
Say you were borrowing his fishing rods.
Report DaveEdwards • January 16, 2010 11:05 PM GMT
Because your cousin had a family issue to discuss face to face and was going out early for some reason. This is your out!
Report Emily Bishop's Gusset • January 16, 2010 11:05 PM GMT
I could have found my miraclle river card!!
Report DaveEdwards • January 16, 2010 11:06 PM GMT
You know it! Speak to him and get the story straight!

Good luck!
Report sparkygayle • January 16, 2010 11:09 PM GMT
EBG - would make a point of rogering the old flame B4 the speed ticket lands coz as sure as eggs are eggs, the truth WILL come out so you may as well do what you WILL be accused of anyway.
GL mate, you may need it.
Report inner city sumo • January 16, 2010 11:09 PM GMT
Why don't you dump your girlfriend?
Report JamesBlakesHugeArse • January 16, 2010 11:13 PM GMT
from what i remember about UK speed cameras is that most of them dont have any film in them, so the chance of the ticket turning up is small
Report Live Forever • January 16, 2010 11:38 PM GMT
...only saving grace that I can think of is that i have a cousin that lives there, but why i would visit him at 6,30 on a saturday morning is anybodys guess..

Well, in that case, by the same rule, why would you visit this woman at 0630 on a Saturday morning, given that she is 'just a mate'?

I put it to you that you were hoping to bend her over the washing machine before the c0ck crows - and that is the difference and why you would not visit your cousin at the same ungodly hour.
Report SuperSuperShire • January 16, 2010 11:43 PM GMT
If the ticket does come thru just say you fancied going for an early morning drive - even suggest you and her go for a drive this weekend, and take a route similar to the one you got caught speeding.
Report The Leopard • January 16, 2010 11:46 PM GMT
I wonder if women have similar scheming threads in their chat rooms...?
Report chicken shack • January 16, 2010 11:47 PM GMT
a very bad arb,trying to recover your losts.
Report FatherMaguire • January 17, 2010 12:01 AM GMT
If there is a cemetery nearby, you could tell her you went corpse-grinding
Report kendonaga • January 17, 2010 9:44 AM GMT
your best idea is to call your father in law and tell him you got done speeding but dont tell the wife cos she always going on that i drive to fast and that would make her day,, if he has got a wife he will surely understand that women do your head in when your driving,.. make no mistake you will get found out if you keep going to see this bird!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!gl
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