There was a young nurse from Dundee...

who died of AIDS.

who had a sore Knee

was she the one in the boot of the car?

who whistled when having a pee

who loved to swallow my wee
when having a piddle
i did have a fiddle
now she cant do P.E

Ken Masters was a bloke on a mission
To every post he offered utmost derision
Some funny some sad, even once not too bad
But always with witty incision

ty and goodnight.

There was a young girl from Barking Creek
Who had a period twice a week
Said her friend from Woking
How provoking
You get no poking so to speak

There was a young nurse from Dundee

Who signed on social security
She signed on and signed on and signed on and signed on and signed on and signed on and signed on and signed on and signed on
and it's going to stay that way for ever

There was a young nurse from Dundee
Who only came up to my knee
But she had a big heart
Baked a lovely jam tart
Not bad for someone so wee

There was a young nurse from Dundee,
Who didn't mean that much to me.
I spanked her mainly,
then f00cked her @nally
I usually pay but she's free.

There was a young nurse from Dundee,
who invited a stray cat for tea,
she gave it cat tuna
under the lovely large luna
will it visit again? we shall see.

There was a young nurse from Dundee
Who had little or no integrity
She slept with West Ham
In the back of a van
And still didn't get round to me ! :(

:)

There was a young nurse from Dundee
Who'd had a hysterectomy*
"Should have done it on BUPA"
She exclaimed in her stupor
As she gave birth to not one but to three.

* (it does scan if you really try)

There was a young nurse from Dundee,
Who liked to have sex up a tree,
After a patients advances,
Whilst entwined in the branches,
With a conker she made history

There was a young nurse from Dundee
who was stung on the nose by a wasp
when asked ' did it hurt? '
she said ' No, not a lot,
it can do it again if it likes'

There was a young vampire called mable
Who's periods were extremely stable
every full moon
she got out her spoon
and drunk herself under the table

There was a young nurse from Dundee
Who had a problem with Big Charlie
To help ease the situation
She gave him colonic irrigation
And now he's as nice as can be

THEIR WAS A YOUNG NURSE FROM DUNDEE
WHO WANTED A BABY FROM ME
I SAID ALLMIGHTY
EVEN THOUGH I LIKE YOUR NIGHTY
YOUR HAVEING NO BABY FROM DO WAH DIDDY

Bish Bash Bosh Do Wah

there once was an overweight trucker
who wasn't much of a looker
but she's a bundle of fun
who like sex up the bum
and for a kebab she'll let you ** her

there was a young nurse from dundee
contracted a severe std
it appears she was fecked
in the mouth and the erse
and last man on was DOO WAH DIDDEE

There was a young nurse from Dundee...
Who got hooked up with Money Tree...
She did find him a bit**ers
But it was too late the did their conkers
He had told her all the wagers were Money Free

There was a young nurse from Dundee who asked to sit on my knee
i rocked her up and down then we hit the town
i bought her a drink then we danced to pink
she told me her name was jean she then caused a scene i took of quick pretended i was sick

flush youve allways got to spoil yourself

:)

There was a young nurse from Dundee
Who went to the land of the free
She was so far from blighty
She set fire to her nightie
And had to jump into the sea.

There was a young nurse from Dundee
Whose** was entirely hair-free
For a pluck or a strum
She'd take one up the bum
And she'd let you completely Scot-free.

There was a young nurse from Dundee
Who once paid a visit to me
She said Dundee Uni's rough,
But I don't give a chuff,
Cos St Andrew's is the place for me!

Do wah .. that is really beautiful. You could become the poet loriate.

THANK YOU MR LIBERATOR


ROSES ARE RED VIOLETS ARE BLUE
IF YOUR A LIBERATOR
ILL VOTE AT THE NEXT ELECTION
FOR YOU

VIOLETS ARE BLUE ROSES ARE RED
I MIGHT BE DISLEXIT
BUT I STILL LIKE YOU

there once was a man called diddy
gives out advice on betfair for free
he once was an alky
but he gave that the malky
and now he partakes only tea.

FLUSH FLUSH THE TIPSTER MAN
NEVER GAVE A WINNER TO ME OR MY MAM
SECOND OF FOUR WAS THE BEST THAT HE GAVE
I WONT BE TAKEING ANY WNNINGS WITH HIS TIPS
TO MY GRAVE

There was a man called Do wah Diddy
His posts made many happy
He loves the caps
That winds up horsey chaps
But don't let him control the cash kitty

;)

The was a young nurse from Dundee
Who struggled with integrity
Dipped her hands in the till
Said it was just such a thrill
Now she's inside doing a three

big charlies 9/10

There once was a nurse from Dundee.
Took my temperature; naked was she!
With my temperature rising,
which was hardly surprising,
it was soon up to a hundred and three!