Chit Chat
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04 Dec 09
18:05
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Date Joined:
04 Feb 09
I'll open up the confessional booth. Dipping the hampton in sherbet when we got a family dog aged 14 (me not the dog). You can guess the rest no doubt. Not sure I'll DABlle in that again. Mind I came like a FOUNTAIN.
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Replies: 42
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Hope you wiped the dog's arse first
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You've led a very sheltered life,imo
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Perce, I love you :)
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Roque - care to share ?
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No thanks Mpr,I'd get banned!
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I once took a girl home, i was paraletic on cider, in the night i got out of bed a took a huge sh1t about 3 paces from the bed, i awoke in the morning,to a huge jobby in my eyeline, noticed said bird was still asleep, made my way to the bathroom, and started screaming you filthy hound, get out there, she believed my dog had come in the room and done it, she didnt know i didnt have a dog.
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:)
It's only illegal if the gibbon says "No" apparently. |
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Splicer, you are absolved my son. Say three hail jobbies and away you go. Next......
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splicer that is sick. I really hope that isnt true
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Amen
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Greggo, unburden yourself my son...................
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Unfortunately greggs it is, i learnt my lesson very young, 12 pints of cider and your arris falls out ;)
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Splicer Keats 04 Dec 19:10
I once took a girl home, i was paraletic on cider, in the night i got out of bed a took a huge sh1t about 3 paces from the bed, i awoke in the morning,to a huge jobby in my eyeline, noticed said bird was still asleep, made my way to the bathroom, and started screaming you filthy hound, get out there, she believed my dog had come in the room and done it, she didnt know i didnt have a dog. ^ yawn urban myth and already posted 2037 times on betfair,must do better. |
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my goodness, I hope you dont get that drunk now
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greggs it was my flat, i had to clean it up off the carpet...never again.
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serves you right
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Hearts, not a myth in the Splicer household, these legends must have some substance.
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I could even tell you the girls name, but you lot might facebook her :)
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I one went carrol singing with some religious folk and pocketed about 7 quid.
I am a thief. Who will rot in the fiery chasms of hell. :( |
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yawnnnnnnn
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Here we go again
I once took 2 sponsor forms home from school, filled both but only declared 1, oh the shame. |
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OK let's get some RULES here. I'm a busy priest. I'm only going to absolve the really BIG sins now (or the ones that involve peoples privates).
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I murdered a curry once.
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Missing the conception of my 3 kids.
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Splicer Keats 04 Dec 19:10
I once took a girl home, i was paraletic on cider, in the night i got out of bed a took a huge sh1t about 3 paces from the bed, i awoke in the morning,to a huge jobby in my eyeline, noticed said bird was still asleep, made my way to the bathroom, and started screaming you filthy hound, get out there, she believed my dog had come in the room and done it, she didnt know i didnt have a dog. Splicer Keats verbal diarrhoea |
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I had my brother shot in the head whilst he was on a boat fishing in a lake.
That will teach him for sneaking. |
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That's ok Eb. Died doing what he loved. ABSLOVED.
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I once told a girlfriend that i was going to work and caught a plane to Thailand to escape from the country-i did ring her after a month to say sorry though..........
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As a child i snuck up on a lady bending at a grave and i armed my diablo catapult with a mint imperial took aim and hit her arse. she screamed and i ran back into the woods. :(
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ok so that doesnt really make my top 100 things im ashamed of. but i did feel bad for a minute.
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Splicer Keats
verbal diarrhoea ^ I concur |
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Is that true Ghamsty?
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yes.
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Awful, deplorable behavior.
I hope you were proud of yourself. :( ;) |
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Sorry Gam. You are NOT pardoned. A foxes glacier mint would have had more clout to it.
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hmmm, hot an ambulance with a battenburg? is that bad? and a german in the face with a sausage.
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hit** not hot.
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If the sausage was Matthew Kelly and the German Herr Flick, then I'll begrudgingly let it through.
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as a young teen i suppose i was a bit of an arse. i wouldnt start fights ever. but a friend was living in the centre of town in a very high up flat, you could pick out your targets with ease and they knew not of where it came. Except the guy comin out of the pub who i got with a teabag and he actutally threatened to beat me up, hardly equal to a teabag landing on your head i'd say.
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