Sandbags in place, pump primed...

come next week it will all be water under the bridge

Best of luck Clarky.

Thanks

Not looking too clever at moment. :(

Good luck Clarky old chum.

Good luck mate.

At least us northerners do bad weather properly. A few big waves lap on the beach in brighton and its headline news for them soft southern koonts

Floods?

He's referring to a married man's preparation for breaching his wife's borders.

I'm sleeping on sofa in lounge tonight, on flood watch every hour or so,
mrs clarky thinks I'm a brave soldier and has made me tea and cakes.

Nice one, it's like camping indoors and I'll be watching wall to wall porn and eating crisps. Game on.

where do you live mate

One doesn't want to carp, Noah, but what's the point of you sleeping downstairs?

Snowdonia foothills.

good luck mate

Lounge is right next to back door Orioles, not withstanding the fact it's also got Sky and is closer to the fridge, don't tell Mrs C though, I've wound up my head torch and have my hat warming by the fire ready for my next sweep of the grounds.

gd luck m8

I'd be upstairs. If you've shored up the defences ... make for high ground!

Hope you make it.

Cheers

I've put 4 of mrs C's frozen veg lasagnes under the feet of the sofa, should give me a couple more hours.

Very funny Clarky!

I'm going out for a reccy, I may be sometime.

He's gone :(

is he in**ermouth?

Don't be coarse, we're grieving.

50 years from now kids will be reading about clarkson in school. Nobody will remember Captain Oates. A new British hero may have perished tonight.

fingers crossed 4u clarkson - pob luc

FK ME. It's carnage out there, the cover has blown off the barbecue and there is about an inch deep puddle underneath the kid's swing.

is he in**ermouth? - I've just booked that on Sky Red Hot Farm

Diolch Ivor, seriously guys, the river has just broken it's bank the rain has eased a bit, but if it doesn't stop the water will be lapping at my door in about 3 hours.

Bugger, you made it, I was going to ask for one of those lasagnes as a memorial.

Praise the Lord and pass the lilo! :)

the fvcker in the bottom floor flat has always ridiculed me for paying a couple of grand more than him for my top floor flat in our block by the river...............anyway i'm off to bed now :D

Surely Clarky there is more to come from higher ground whether it stops raining or not. You need to get out of there . man the boats

Those lasagnes will probably last about 50 years, they will be like the 4 bloody commandments, some fella called Gwylim will find them washed up on the beach with the chiselled inscription 'burn after finding'.

There's a new build atop Snowdon - maybe relocate next Spring ;)

You're not wrong Dobbo, even after the rain stops the levels rise for a couple more hours, but they do go down quick, which coincidentally is another DVD I've got lined up for later.

I was flooded last year. It's a surreal experience. I noticed the lights reflecting off the waves below made quite beautiful patterns on the ceiling. And, surprisingly, I wasn't drunk. But it was just clean flood water - no sewage. Sewage tends to cast a pall on things.

Nice one, it's like camping indoors and I'll be watching wall to wall porn and eating crisps. Game on.

:D

Going out for another recce.

Nothing you can do about it clarkson. Just make contingent plans. Once that's done, relax and enjoy the show of Mother Nature's indifferent strength.

Not good, banks well and truly breached and raining heavy again, SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT.!!

Have you moved anything upstairs yet ?

I'll wait till she's gone to sleep .

If you haven't really got a pump there is one in my shed you can borrow

Thanks Dobson, just got one of these badboys today, think I will be firing it up before the night is out.

http://www.justgenerators.co.uk/pages/HondaWP20.htm

Move things upstairs now! It moves awful quick! And makes a pretty awful noise as it moves through the plumbing.

undie101 19 Nov 22:24
where do you live mate
------------------------------------
clarkson 19 Nov 22:25
Snowdon
=====================
Kfin heck we are ALL in trouble :0 :0

clarky ...Tell that Noah guy next door to stop making that racket with his hammer + saw..

Good news, Clarky.
The BBC weather report says the rain will be dying out overnight and will have moved eastwards by Friday morning.

Then more heavy rain Saturday/Sunday.

Still waiting for that TT.? It's blowing a bloody hooly out there now. :(

It's calmed down a lot here, Clarky, and the rain stopped a long time ago.

Had no rain here for two days. Didn't stop for the previous four.

I think it's hitting your area tomorrow afternoon, BC, but not to the extent Cumbria etc have had the last couple of days.

Doomed! We're all doomed!

I picked up about a 'million' dead leaves from the back garden this morning. Still very windy today, but the two trees are not bare yet. Great drainage in this part of Norfolk. Some roads outside Wisbech tend to flood, but never had a problem here.

If you're anywhere near the fens you're under water in a decade.

So they reckon, Bodil.
I don't care.

Nor me.

Looks like it was probably the most rainfall in 24hrs EVER recorded in Britain, not official but likely to have beaten the record of 11 inches in 1955 :0

It's been very, very windy here for quite a few days.
It keeps blowing the gas fire out. Luckily, the thing has an automatic cut-out when that happens, otherwise I'd be brown bread now!

Tha back garden always used to be dry as a bone, even after plenty of rain, until they built houses on the farmland behind me.
Now, there are so many of the new householders have put down plastic sheeting and pebbles/flagstones in their gardens, mine becomes like a bog after a day or two of rain, as it all drains off here.

I really wish people would give some consideration what they're doing when they employ such measures. It's dreadful for the wildlife, let alone other householders.

You should kill them TT. And hang their shrunken heads outside the front door. What have you got to lose?

Good idea Bodil!

Good stuff.

I still haven't forgiven the prats who cut down the 3 oak trees (3 different people).
A shocking thing to do.

In the garden and rising. !!!! :0

Oh dear, Clarky!
Get the saucepans ready to bail out!

CLARKY

Are you still with us ? :(

===================================
Brother in law suffers from floods, Tommy. In an area that shouldn't flood, near Romford. Drains in the road at the front can cope, but back gardens can't. He's the third from last house on a gentle downhill slope. Got a very long garden, but found out in the first winter he was there why most of the other people had concreted over their garden. It was 2 feet deep at the bottom of his garden after heavy rain. All the houses are built two feet above the ground at the back. The last house in the road is dry, but his garden could host the swimming Olympic events after heavy rain.

This, this is a very high quality thread. Bravo to all concerned.

... and so we commit our brother, Clarky, and his sofa, to the 4 " deep.

Eternal Father, strong to save,
Whose arm hath bound the restless wave,
Who bidd'st the mighty ocean deep
Its own appointed limits keep;
Oh, hear us when we cry to Thee,
For those in peril on the sea!

^^ my favourite hymn in junior school. :)

Hope all is well, clarky. Marooned in Langdale here. Can't get out in any direction. The Co-op say they still have food for a few days yet.

I have to say, despite my view that religion is the final word on human stupidity and cowardice, I do like a good hymn.

Of course, it would better if it didn't require Clarky clinging to the roof of his home and eating his shoes, but still ...

slartybartfast 20 Nov 12:01
Hope all is well, clarky. Marooned in Langdale here. Can't get out in any direction. The Co-op say they still have food for a few days yet.


Don't tell him, Pikes :)

Very good, Charlie!

They used to call me 'laughing boy'..... look at me now :(

=======================

CLARKSON

WHERE ARE YOU OLD SON ?

I'm on the farkin roof, the RAF have just turned up in a Wessex from Valley, Mrs Clarky mentioned a mug of tea and a slab of Vegetable Lasagne and now they've all disappeared saying something about a pier rescue in Colwyn Bay..!! Stupid woman. :(

Seriously, the rain stopped just after 3am and the levels have dropped quite well through the day, garden was fully submerged and got abou 6 ft from the back door at it's height. Promising more tomorrow so all hands on deck again, well, me in the lounge again.

I know I'm making light of it, and hopefully it won't breach our house defences, but my thoughts do go out to all those people who have been seriously affected by these floods, particularly the family and friends of the policeman who drowned in Darlington. Sad news.

I saw the photos of**ermouth early this morning, 4 collapsed bridges and water up to 8 feet deep in some streets. 11 missing but 10 found later in the day.

Tragic for the policemans family.

Keswick last night wasn't that bad.

Best of luck in welsh Wales mate.

sounds terrible. all the best, lads

Darlington - Workington