Chit Chat
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14 Nov 09
08:13
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Date Joined:
15 Oct 05
From the wifes book club.. Warned not allowed to make a single joke.
what shall I talk about.?
Upside one of them is a professional chef.
what shall I talk about.?
Upside one of them is a professional chef.
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Replies: 54
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Oh come on; pie jokes, fingers in dykes etc. Your wife is being unreasonable. I'm not suggesting a **phobic tirade, but a little levity at least.
My gay friends are very funny and would be horrified if a dinner guest sat there in terrified silence. |
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Take a video camera dor the action later.
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Best to be open and crude about it imo
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Are they butch/femme? or butch/butch?
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1.01 fish fingers to be served
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If you have seafood , dont ask for a finger bowl
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Take a furry cup
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be gutted if they dont ask you for a threesome ;\
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surely his wife can make her own mind up
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You could always steer the conversation around to Prisoner Cell Block H.
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Kev , one is a hippo and one is a skinny cropped haired dyke that could pass as a dyke
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The mention of a 3some has made me quite sick.. you would need a shovel to reach the big ones fufu
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But by all accounts they are great drinkers.. therfore danger is getting bladdered and being unable to resit the Bille Jean King "strapadichtomy" joke from years gone by
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RR - you should be yourself!
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if cheese and biscuits come out try the -
"What's the difference between a Ritz cracker and a lesbian? One's a snack cracker, the other's a crack snacker." |
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is Rugoo on the menu
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Was in the same poition (ahem) once. Ended up buying a bed off them by the end of the night.
At least it was clean. |
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Melon Fan(ny)
Roast Beaver Flapjacks |
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nothing better than all gathering around the fire and munching away on their carpet
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Just don't get into this state. Harry Enfield sketch when the gay son brings his boyfriend home for Xmas.
Boyfriend "Can I have a mince pie?" Father "Sure, I'll get out of your way" Boyfriend "What?" Father "I thought you wanted to mince by" http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pC5rpJgCUQ0&feature=related |
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I've never been to Lesbos.
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This joke always goes down well with my lesbian mates.
Martina Navratilova visits her gynaecologist for a check-up. As she gets dressed, she asks him how everything looked down there. "Magnificent, Martina, quite magnificent" he enthused. "Oh come on, there must be something not quite as magnificent as it should be" she asked "No Martina, you are just perfect. I can only ask you, 'how do you keep everything so clean and tidy?' " "Well, it's not all down to me, I have a woman in twice a week". |
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a lesbian is describing how she feels -she said as soon as i wake up i think about women ,when i am at work all i think about is women ,when i get home all i think about is women,
feck me for 49 years i thought i was straight ive just realised im a lesbian! |
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^ better punctuation would have helped that one...
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Also like -
Q. What do you call an opened can of tuna in a lesb1an's flat? A. Pot Pourri. |
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Ham on Ham (menu NAP) BON APPETIT
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If you are pleased by the meal, offer to straighten them out.
If the meal displeases, subject them to a gayyist rant. |
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with that username just try not to come between them .
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regvarney 14 Nov 13:17
luddite, 12.07.....i have posted that joke on here several times..... ....at least have the good grace to put me in the credits Sandy Toksvig told me it on The News Quiz the other night |
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Sultans jokes are in the memory bank for later.
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What did one lesbian vampire say to the other?
"See you then - same time next month." |
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Think I will text to missus when she is sitting opposite me during the dinner those beauties
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lol Rabbit - that's a must.
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will report on progress tomorrow
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Just got a text from Rampant. He says "Car keys have just gone in the bowl" :0
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Q: How can you tell if two lesbians are twins?
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They will not eat their brussels
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Update imminent I would hope.
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can't wait ;-)
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