Cheltenham Festival
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1) A thread entitled "you know it's nearly Cheltenham when..." appears on the phorum
2) You go for a haircut and consider it your Festival Haircut
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2) You go for a haircut and consider it your Festival Haircut
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Replies: 61
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180s plunge thread pops up again
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Good one!
4) You wander over a bit of grass on the way to work and wonder how the going underfoot compares to 200 miles south east at Prestbury Park  |
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5) You're so close to losing the plot you get your east and west confused.
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6) you starting getting rid of the Scottish notes for nice English ones!!
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7) The Stat nerds appear!
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Joist
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You are frightened to open the RP website in case another of your ante post bets has been stuck down by injury or illness
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8) You have an opinion on the water table
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I definitely do no.4) every time we go for a walk in the park with the kids. By the second week of March she is normally saying "If I hear about the going one more time..."
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you get an official looking letter drop through the letter box informing you that you are required to do jury service ! and it just happens to be the week of the festival
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No way!!! That's horrendous. You should try and get out of it. Tell the judge you can't be a neutral jury member because of your ongoing struggles with racism. I had to work the Tuesday and Wednesday last year cos I was too slow getting the leave in the diary and the feckers had me on a training course. Didn't make the same mistake this year. Whole week got booked back in April 2015.
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no mary it happened to me a few years back .................got out of it in the end but made for some horrendous nights trying to sleep .................... the missus opened the letter and said "oh you've got to do jury service " oh year says I whens that THEN , second week in march says she , ME ...........OH YEAH ! then it hits me .alarm bells start ringing !....... me" give us that fookin letter ".............................dear sir ,you have been selected for jury service at the old bailey criminal court OR WORDS TO THAT EFFECT ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO !
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Good grief that would give me a heart attack reading that letter. How did you get out of it?
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some sad b,stard bumps the "top 10 rules for the festival thread " about 2 weeks before the event !
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Laughing and nodding at all of these :-)
9) When you start looking at the long-range forecast for Cheltenham in February! 10) You meet your mates and say: "hello, how are you? and have you any bankers yet?" |
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11) Your watching all the ante post handicap markets daily looking for the potenial McManus plunge
12) You start hearing from people who haven't spoken to you since last year, looking for tips for Cheltenham |
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Cretins start posting about 'xx number of sleeps to the start of the Supreme - feel like a kid at Christmas!'
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'Holier than thou' Flat boys start in with sh1t about the Dubai Carnival and the Lincoln
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Jonjo O'Neil and David Pipe make even less sense than usual
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Ming_the_Merciless
Joined: 22 May 09 Replies: 3107 26 Feb 16 09:01 7) The Stat nerds appear! Bingo! You read stuff like '......and Twiston-Davies is 0/61 in Chases at the Festival when the horse has had more than 51 days rest, was born under Capricorn rising and when it crossed a ley-line' ....and you actually give this stuff time of day!  |
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"4) You wander over a bit of grass on the way to work and wonder how the going underfoot compares to 200 miles south east at Prestbury Park Crazy"
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Jb23
8) You have an opinion on the water table Lol'ing profusely, so true! 13) You've started searching *insert random horse here* on Twitter looking for some backup that it's a handicap snip. |
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14) Anticipation for the arrival of NRNB on all races is greater than the arrival of your first-born child
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15) Every racing forum on the planet is 100x busier with no nothing types spouting off about how they think WPM might have a good week so they're following him blind.
16) Lush start their annual "Let's be anti-horse racing" season posting a list of horses injured or killed in their Cheltenham stores window, T@ssers like them sicken me to the core. |
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The f*ckin state of you lot
I'm just wondering how many are going to turn up in a Rich Ricci scarf, half tempted to take my baseball bat with me this year, at least for the first day. |
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Edward Gillespie or whoever is now the Clerk of the Course talk about watering the course if it hasn't rained for 30 mins.
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Simon Claisse starts to name drop celebrity weatherman John Kettley
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When the national lottery are in on the act
Please.............Don,t let it be Min |
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When you're up on a sunday morning with a hangover the size of Asia watching last years festival on 432
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Here here 180.
When you start dreaming about potential results. Woke up in a state of horror last night after dreaming STD took the wrong course in the champion hurdle & Tiger Roll won haha |
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Hahaha
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Had one the other night when min was second and myska won the supreme! Didn't even have a skinful the night before!
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The rain stops.............making all the form of the previous 4 months utterly worthless.
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when the wife stats nagging and says its ok for you away all week not giving a fck about me lol
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it must be a pretty lonley place on your own especially if its freezing cold and your losing
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.................... when Arsenals title push gets derailed once again
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