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Is there anything more annoying than a house fly?

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Replies: 65
By:
ericster
When: 06 Jul 21 14:03

Jul 6, 2021 -- 1:15PM, FOYLESWAR wrote:


not saying you should get one of these barstool but when on holiday in spain years back the hotel had this big fookin grill type thing on the wall

By:
ericster
When: 06 Jul 21 14:04
Insectecutors, they don't half crackle 'n' pop, but they do the job. Flies and most other bugs can't resist them.
By:
duffy
When: 06 Jul 21 14:05
Pull the curtains when it fly's around the window to trap it, push window open...out it goes, no spray needed..simples
By:
chipbutty
When: 06 Jul 21 19:30
A house fly with a Scouse accent.
By:
elisjohn
When: 06 Jul 21 19:54
i love it when a fly walks on my arm  or leg Grin
By:
lead on
When: 06 Jul 21 19:58
Barry Hills trained The Fly.
By:
Hayden
When: 06 Jul 21 20:35
Having a good bet on one beaten a nose , reckon it would be a million the fly lasting 30 secs after that.
By:
doorman99
When: 06 Jul 21 20:53
The spray you need is called Kybosh, brilliant stuff but don't breath it in, you will have a sore throat otherwise.
By:
harry callaghan
When: 06 Jul 21 21:05
Dr Crippen 06 Jul 21 08:47 Joined: 16 Apr 02 | Topic/replies: 44,663 | Blogger: Dr Crippen's blog
Cut a long thick elastic band.
Hold the one end between the finger and thumb, and the other end between the finger and thumb of your other hand.

Stretch the elastic band and stalk the fly.

When your one hand is close to the fly, take aim and release the one end of the elastic band - splat. Strike one fly.

No quarter asked, no quarter given. That's the way I operate.

Brilliant this Laugh


DIFERENT GRAVY 12 06 Jul 21 09:50 Joined: 01 Mar 07 | Topic/replies: 3,812 | Blogger: DIFERENT GRAVY 12's blog
Also had an electric tennis racquet but it didnt last long.

With Wimbledon in mindGrin


Some exceptional analysis and commitment to the problem the opening post has faced in the past couple of daysHappy with key methods in order to restrain the creatureLaugh just a great effort and a highly enjoyable thread for people with nothing better to do than talk flys…admirable stuffHappy


Saddo not been back on, hopefully he hasn’t confronted the Hungarian weight lifter from next door…we can only hope he is in good health.
Another potential situation for the forum to help withConfused
By:
sageform
When: 07 Jul 21 07:58
People who open windows and allow flies in!
By:
elise
When: 07 Jul 21 10:23
i have a cheap and alternative solution - if the fly is on the window, use a glass spray, if the fly is around furniture use mr sheen, either knocks them out so you can finish the job but the real bonus is a quick wipe of the overspray and you can tell the mrs you've done housework and she'll be able to smell it meaning brownie points
By:
undertaker
When: 07 Jul 21 11:17
Vapona window stickers work well for us. We buy 8 stickers every spring (about £4 for a pack of 4 on ebay and they look like sunflowers) and stick them on our windows around the house. Within days there are piles of dead critters on the windowsills underneath each sticker. Once a year, peel them off (they don't leave a mess) and replace with a new one.

The electric tennis rackets are good for the giant wasps which come down our chimney every winter. They make a very satisfying BANG and produce a small puff of acrid smoke when the wasp is electrocuted.
By:
barstool
When: 07 Jul 21 12:23
undertaker... "giant wasps coming down our chimney in winter"

Sounds like you might have Burglars mate. Look out for the one wearing a mask and carrying a swagbag.
By:
chipbutty
When: 07 Jul 21 12:41
I didn't even know those tennis rackets existed. For the bloodthirsty couple, you could buy 2 and turn it into a nice game. I on the other hand am a big softy and leave windows and doors open and patiently coax them out with a few kind words, "go on buddy, you're ok" being a favourite.

God only knows why I'm single Sad
By:
elise
When: 07 Jul 21 12:46
u should still get one of his tennis rackets and then maybe try whacking a few women with it, you might get lucky and be able to drag one back to your place
By:
chipbutty
When: 07 Jul 21 12:55
I would rather entice a nice lady with my wit, charm and dashing good looks...... but as I've got none of these, which model racket would you suggest Elise? I like a larger lady so I'm thinking something with a big head?
By:
elise
When: 07 Jul 21 13:01
if you are in need a big head you're better off asking willie shafter imo, however i think you may be underselling yourself and you should start with a ping pong bat and just find the right sized @rse and give it a forehand
By:
elise
When: 07 Jul 21 13:03
similarly to my mr sheen option this can also be used as a fly swatter if you get bored of asking them to leave and if you get a 2nd one you could apply for a job at the local airport directing planes to their alotted parking spaces
By:
chipbutty
When: 07 Jul 21 13:09
This sounds like a good plan Elise although I'll have to adjust it slightly as I'm stronger on my backhand.
By:
elise
When: 07 Jul 21 13:10
i'd save the backhand for a decent catch like a supermodel or barmaid
By:
chipbutty
When: 07 Jul 21 13:22
I don't know what the barmaids are like where you are, but mine would need a double handed backhand if you know what I mean, and I doubt even that would stun her.
By:
FOYLESWAR
When: 07 Jul 21 13:59
just a few moments ago a big fly was buzzing around my front room, the missus had left the henry hoover out ,i didnt have a newspaper to roll and swat the fooka so switched the henry on took the head and pipes off and chased it round the room after about 2 mins i caught up with marty mc fly and he dissapeared down the tube .he  musta thought he was caught  in a mini tornado.
By:
1830
When: 07 Jul 21 15:14
Hairspray
By:
jackdaw
When: 07 Jul 21 15:28
A house fly has a life expectancy of about 3 weeks so why not just wait it out?
By:
lead on
When: 07 Jul 21 15:47
I'd say that the midgies are more annoying..quite demented by them at times
By:
barstool
When: 07 Jul 21 15:56
Went out on a boat to dine, on Loch Neigh in Northern Ireland. Had to come to shore early as a plague of Midges descended on us. Never seen anything like it, bit the hell out of us. Scottish Highland Lochs just as bad, can't possibly fish without a hat on. Balaclava best.
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