Forums
Welcome to Live View – Take the tour to learn more
Start Tour
There is currently 1 person viewing this thread.
stewarty b
08 Jun 21 18:18
Joined:
Date Joined: 02 Aug 02
| Topic/replies: 30,459 | Blogger: stewarty b's blog
Two police officers were called to a distressing scene where the witnessed a 70 year old male weeping uncontrollably on a bench in a park. After calling paramedics to the scene they injected the man with 40mg of Diazepam to calm him down to see what the problem was.

WILLHE eventually managed to tell them...'I've tried four pharmacies and they're all out of Vaseline'.


He was last seen being driven to Newcastle and North Tyneside Crisis Team Ravenswood Clinic. Hope he recovers.
Pause Switch to Standard View WILLHE SHAFTEHIM found in tears on...
Show More
Loading...
Report stewarty b June 8, 2021 7:53 PM BST
I phoned the clinic for an update and the staff thought they had solved the problem. They got SHAFTHIM a tub of Vasaline however Shafthim threw it on the floor and started screaming forcing the staff to sedate him again. He was last heard mumbling...'I only do large tubs'.


Staff are now thinking somewhere more secure for him. I will update.
Report stewarty b June 8, 2021 9:04 PM BST
Update not inspiring. He's been moved to a secure unit after continually mumbling to himself...' I'm the daddy, I'm the daddy'.

One of the staff had had enough and said. no WILLHE, you the QUEENIE' and then it all kicked off. It took two female nurses to hold him down for his next injection.

Update later.
Report Rico-Dangleflaps June 8, 2021 9:15 PM BST
Report stewarty b June 8, 2021 10:15 PM BST
1.01 landed. Plenty more to come..
Report Rico-Dangleflaps June 8, 2021 10:34 PM BST
stewarty b 06 Jun 21 20:15
Prizeout?
wtf is this all about please? tia.

stewarty b 07 Jun 21 08:47

What is Prizeout?

Prizeout is a withdrawal method available for Betfair customers in the UK and Ireland.

Withdrawing with Prizeout will allow you the option to withdraw your winnings via a Gift Card instead of withdrawing to your bank or to another payment method.

Your Gift Card will be sent to you by Prizeout within minutes to your email address registered on your Betfair account. Please note that in certain situations there may be a slight delay, as we aim to help best protect our customers and keep your funds safe.

Prizeout offers exclusive deals and offers to users in the form of digital Gift Cards and will often have attractive offers with great brands.

possibly the thickest forumite ever to grace the forum..thicker than mandingo's ****.
Report stewarty b June 8, 2021 10:37 PM BST
WILLHE SHAFTHIM in full flow and an update from his 'premises' shortly...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1RHBAd5YUR8
Report stewarty b June 8, 2021 10:39 PM BST
Receipt
Unplaced bets
The following bets could not be placed

Back (Bet For)
Odds
Stake
Profit
Authorised Speed
1.63
£10,000.00
£6,300.00
You do not have sufficient available funds to place these bets or you have exceeded your exposure limit. Deposit now
Report Rico-Dangleflaps June 8, 2021 10:50 PM BST
mrs stewy currently riding the latex mandingo...
Report stewarty b June 8, 2021 11:00 PM BST
Latest update not good I'm afraid.


The staff noticed he wasn't eating so gave him his favorite meal.....fagg otts and tatties.


His eyes lit up wen he saw the fagg otts but still refused to eat.

Staff got concerned but solved the problem by getting him a bottle of Daddies sauce.

His eyes lit up.


Staff allowed him to take the bottle with him to bed to keep him calm.

They checked him half an hour later and the bottle has disappeared.

A personal body search tomorrow..
Report stewarty b June 8, 2021 11:08 PM BST
I feel sorry for WILLHE. It's all down to his science teacher when he tried to explain the planets. WILLHE was doing well until his teacher mentioned the planet Uranus.

WILLHE was never seen in school again.
Report Rico-Dangleflaps June 8, 2021 11:35 PM BST
stewarty b 06 Jun 21 20:15
Prizeout?

ffs ydc Laugh
Report stewarty b June 8, 2021 11:40 PM BST
OH No he's ordered 10 frozen packs of fagg otts from Iceland. Loves them apparently. Never tasted myself...
Report Rico-Dangleflaps June 8, 2021 11:44 PM BST
euphemism.
Report stewarty b June 8, 2021 11:47 PM BST
He's  had a colonoscopy but the consultant says he needs one a month. Apparently laps it up.
Report stewarty b June 9, 2021 12:12 AM BST
WILLHE bedded up but they will find that bottle of Daddies. Could be a lot of pain involved with that project...
Report chavman June 9, 2021 10:40 AM BST
Think stews got a hard on for you steve
Report stewarty b June 9, 2021 6:30 PM BST
Phoned the secure unit. Will update later.
Report greenteethnarrabacktroutmoy June 9, 2021 6:33 PM BST
stewy tumescent imo.
Report stewarty b June 9, 2021 6:35 PM BST
It's not good news I'm afraid.
Report stewarty b June 9, 2021 6:45 PM BST
The only good news I can report at present is that the staff have managed to get him to eat again. He was offered fish and chips but refused. One nurse said to him, 'What about with tossed salad WILLHE'? His eyes lit up and he devoured the lot but it was not a good scene when they let him watch some television..
Report flukes June 9, 2021 6:55 PM BST
Stew, you are starting to come across as another glentoby. Enough said.
Report stewarty b June 9, 2021 6:59 PM BST
fo
Report greenteethnarrabacktroutmoy June 9, 2021 7:13 PM BST
Report greenteethnarrabacktroutmoy June 9, 2021 7:15 PM BST
Report Hayden June 9, 2021 7:18 PM BST
Crikey , last time i witnessed a thread like this was during a Glenfibber meltdown.
Report greenteethnarrabacktroutmoy June 9, 2021 7:45 PM BST
mrs stewy obsessed with the latex mandingo.
Report stewarty b June 9, 2021 8:28 PM BST
Last I heard from the secure hospital was that SHAFTHIM was allowed to watch TV for a wee while last night. Who wants to be a millionaire came on and SHAFTHIM started to scream and mumble...'I'm one of the... but he couldn't get all the words out after biting one of the nurses in the @rse and having to be restrained with a muzzle.


The nurse was male but got his tetanus shot..
Report leif June 9, 2021 8:33 PM BST
Laugh

[back to lurking]
Report Rico-Dangleflaps June 9, 2021 9:38 PM BST
how dus noxio get a signal from the pedalo?
Report knoxville June 9, 2021 9:44 PM BST
sure why dont you cut n paste a few color pictures wanxershaft like the good little troll that you are
give us a laugh you fooktard
Report Rico-Dangleflaps June 9, 2021 10:11 PM BST
Report stewarty b June 9, 2021 11:20 PM BST
Latest from his institution is so so. He refuses to mix with the other inmates. One nurse thought he had the answer. 'Fancy a game of checkers or draughts WILLHE? He replied no....so the nurse suggested chess instead. ' What's chess? WILLHE replied'


Let's try a game WILLHE.


The nurse took out the board and pieces and set them up hoping it would give WILLHE some interest but WILLHE showed no interest....until he saw the bishops. A rampant fan now only using the bishops frequently in the hope of winning a game or get released. Mumbled to the nurse he was a chess/bishop man from now on.
Report chavman June 10, 2021 9:26 AM BST
Stew on the spice again 1.01
Report stewarty b June 10, 2021 10:56 AM BST
Phoned the institution this morning. The latest is disturbing to say the least. Will update later.
Report lead on June 10, 2021 11:19 AM BST
Pretty pathetic attempt at humour,Stewart...you need a break from here before it destroys you.
Report stewarty b June 10, 2021 11:38 AM BST
Thanks for that pathetic advice lead on. Time for you to visit Hazelhead zoo to be fed.
Report chavman June 10, 2021 1:50 PM BST
Any pretend monkeys there
Report greenteethnarrabacktroutmoy June 10, 2021 1:55 PM BST
yes..a bloke in an ape suit.
Report lead on June 10, 2021 2:05 PM BST
I have to admit though,that last riposte was quite funny stewartyGrin
Report stewarty b June 10, 2021 2:09 PM BST
I've got a cracker to come lead on.
Report lead on June 10, 2021 2:25 PM BST
I'm hanging from my branch on tenterhooks...used to get fed quite regularly at Hazelhead actually..in the cafe at the park.
Report stewarty b June 10, 2021 2:30 PM BST
Had many a  sandwich in the cafe. Nice place for a picnic and a few cold ones out of the cooler box whilst getting a tan.
Report greenteethnarrabacktroutmoy June 10, 2021 3:05 PM BST
Report stewarty b June 11, 2021 1:31 PM BST
I'm double checking the latest episode re: SHAFTHIM as it's really beyond belief and I want to get the facts 100% accurate. Will post later or Sunday with tomorrow being a busy day.


Like I say, it's beyond belief hence the double checking with the staff at the institution.
Report stewarty b June 14, 2021 6:54 AM BST
Latest update is that the staff are very concerned about SHAFTHIM. A weird and woeful weird story updated imminent.
Report chavman June 14, 2021 7:08 AM BST
It seems you’re the weird and woeful one stew
Report stewarty b June 14, 2021 7:36 AM BST
Get digging them holes craig.
Report greenteethnarrabacktroutmoy June 14, 2021 3:38 PM BST
wd STEWY CLICK HERE for free krankies poster
Post Your Reply
<CTRL+Enter> to submit
Please login to post a reply.

Wonder

Instance ID: 13539
www.betfair.com